Aug 26, 2009: Cockney ATM

xoxoxoBruce · 08-25-2009, 11:36 PM

Of course ATM machines around the world use the local language...
...except in the USA where you have to press 1 for the local language.

This ATM uses Cockney.

Quote:

Bank Machine, which runs 2,500 ATMs across the country, was aiming to amuse, but it has grander ambitions too. It hopes to follow the Cockney cash machines with Brummie, Geordie, Scouse and Scots ATMs. It hopes that ATMs will serve to keep these dialects alive in Britain.

Some were amused, but not all.

Quote:

But John Strachan, 52, an IT worker from Dundee, found the experience troubling. When it offered to serve him in English or Cockney, he suspected a hoax. He selected Cockney.

“Readin’ your bladder of lard”, read the message on the screen. It asked for his “Huckleberry Finn”. Then more bewildering questions: did he wanted to see his balance on the Charlie Sheen? Did he wish to change his Huckleberry Finn or did he simply require sausage and mash, with or without a receipt?

After the concept was explained to him, he was so indignant that he resorted to slang himself: “It’s complete pants,” he said. “Using an ATM is a very sensitive moment.”

Yeah Bank Machine, don't mess with a guy's sensitive moments.

link

ZenGum · 08-26-2009, 12:01 AM

"Sausage and Mash"???

Surely it is Bangers and Mash.

Mind you, when I saw "Cockney ATM", my filthy little mind went somewhere different.

ats · 08-26-2009, 08:11 AM

There are some photos on the DNA Lounge site of their customised ATM with a bunch of industrial-music-themed messages. Apparently some customers get a bit antsy about an ATM displaying the banner "SURPRISE, SURPRISE: THE GOVERNMENT LIES"...

birdclaw · 08-26-2009, 09:11 AM

So I hate to be "that guy" but I need a translator. Balance on Fleet Street? Written in blood?

monster · 08-26-2009, 09:16 AM

no translation is possible. That's not true cockney slang. great idea but very disappointing. very poorly executed. i've a good mind to get on the dog about this pony.

xoxoxoBruce · 08-26-2009, 10:30 AM

Quote:

There seemed to be a scarcity of real Cockneys in Spitalfields to communicate with the cash machine in their mother tongue.

Farther east, however, next to the Cockney cash machine in Hackney, Roy Parker, 62, a bona fide Cockney, was working behind the counter of a mini-cab firm. So, what did he think of the ATM outside?

“Real Cockneys don’t have bank accounts or all that palava,” he said. “They put it under the mattress.”

limey · 08-26-2009, 01:16 PM

Cab drivers have their accounts in Switzerland, I believe ...

Gravdigr · 08-26-2009, 04:02 PM

Get your money from a machine??? An A.T. wha??? This'll never catch on...

08-26-2009, 12:01 AM	#2
ZenGum Doctor Wtf Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Badelaide, Baustralia Posts: 12,861	"Sausage and Mash"??? Surely it is Bangers and Mash. Mind you, when I saw "Cockney ATM", my filthy little mind went somewhere different. __________________ Shut up and hug. MoreThanPretty, Nov 5, 2008. Just because I'm nominally polite, does not make me a pussy. Sundae Girl.

08-26-2009, 09:11 AM	#4
birdclaw putting the "g" in flight Join Date: Jun 2008 Posts: 145	So I hate to be "that guy" but I need a translator. Balance on Fleet Street? Written in blood? __________________ “The difference between a man and a boy is, a boy wants to grow up to be a fireman, but a man wants to grow up to be a giant monster fireman.”

08-26-2009, 09:16 AM	#5
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	no translation is possible. That's not true cockney slang. great idea but very disappointing. very poorly executed. i've a good mind to get on the dog about this pony. __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

08-26-2009, 01:16 PM	#7
limey Encroaching on your decrees Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: An island within the south-west coast of Scotland Posts: 7,016	Cab drivers have their accounts in Switzerland, I believe ... __________________ Living it up on the edge ... of civilisation, within the southwest coast of

08-26-2009, 04:02 PM	#8
Gravdigr The Un-Tuckian Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: South Central...KY that is Posts: 39,517	Get your money from a machine??? An A.T. wha??? This'll never catch on... __________________ These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off.

08-26-2009, 08:11 AM	#3
ats Neophyte-in-training Join Date: Aug 2009 Posts: 3	There are some photos on the DNA Lounge site of their customised ATM with a bunch of industrial-music-themed messages. Apparently some customers get a bit antsy about an ATM displaying the banner "SURPRISE, SURPRISE: THE GOVERNMENT LIES"...

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