The utterly pointless heid of Lumberjim thread

[monster]

http://www.cellar.org/showthread.php...333#post651333

Definitely not a pointy heid, therefore pointless.

[Trilby]

he looks a little wall-eyed there.

[ZenGum]

If Lumberjim's heid were just 1% larger, it would collapse under it's own gravity and form a neutron star.

[monster]

If it weren't for lumberjim's heid, the earth would orbit the moon

[squirell nutkin]

Considered inaccurate, the platinum-iridium bar was replaced by lumberjims heid as the standard benchmark for a meter.

It was replaced however when it was discovered that you know who's brain produced 1,650,763.73 wavelengths of the orange-red emission line in the electromagnetic spectrum of the krypton-86 atom in a vacuum every time she thought about baby kittehs.

[Shawnee123]

Just 'cause your haid looks like a filbert jar:

THE BOY AND THE FILBERTS

A Boy put his hand into a jar of Filberts, and grasped as many as his fist could possibly hold. But when he tried to pull it out again, he found he couldn't do so, for the neck of the jar was too small to allow of the passage of so large a handful. Unwilling to lose his nuts but unable to withdraw his hand, he burst into tears. A bystander, who saw where the trouble lay, said to him, "Come, my boy, don't be so greedy: be content with half the amount, and you'll be able to get your hand out without difficulty."

Do not attempt too much at once.

[toranokaze]

Lumberjim what a small head. -Things you will never hear

[Sundae]

Lumberjim's Heid is so massive that Jim Croce wrote a song about it.

[toranokaze]

I love that song

[squirell nutkin]

"lj' heid"

(As recorded by )
SN

I guess that it was bound to happen
Was just a matter of time
But now I've come to my decision
And it's a-one of the painful kind
'Cause now it seems that you wanted a Big Heid
Just the regular size wouldn't do
But baby I can't find a big, enormous hat for you.

You really got to hand it to you
'Cause man you really tried
But for ev'ry time that we went shoping
There were two times that I cried
And you were tryin' to make me your milliner
And that's the one thing that I couldn't do
'Cause baby I can't find a big, enormous hat for you..

'Cause big heads are meant for turnin'
And people are bound to change
And hat racks are meant for burnin'
When the heads and ball caps they join aren't the same.

Still I'll hope that you can find barber
Who could cut what I could not
He'll have to try the "giant shear", or maybe a "super cuts"
'Cause I never was much of a barber before
And I ain't 'bout to start nothin' new
And baby I can't trim that big, enormous head for you.

'Cause big heads are meant for turnin'
And people are bound to change
And hat racks are meant for burnin'
When the heads and ball caps they join aren't the same.

Still I'll hope that you can find barber
Who could cut what I could not
He'll have to try the "giant shear", or maybe a "super cuts"
'Cause I never was much of a barber before
And I ain't 'bout to start nothin' new
And baby I can't trim that big, enormous head for you.

[Clodfobble]

Originally Posted by Shawnee123

THE BOY AND THE FILBERTS
...

OMG I hated that parable as a kid. I was always like, "Goddammit, just take one fistful out, then put your damn hand back in a second time, you moron!" My teachers were always rather irritated at my interpretation of the lesson.

[squirell nutkin]

Never heard that parable, but that is a way to catch monkeys. And once again, shop vac.

[Griff]

There are tribes in the South Pacific who believe that one day a plane will arrive large enough to carry that haieeed.

[Shawnee123]

Originally Posted by Clodfobble

OMG I hated that parable as a kid. I was always like, "Goddammit, just take one fistful out, then put your damn hand back in a second time, you moron!" My teachers were always rather irritated at my interpretation of the lesson.

Seriously. That stupid kid doesn't deserve any filberts, that's for sure!

Today, that kid is having trouble getting through the McDonalds drive-thru.