Is using proper titles in social situations pretentious?

[glatt]

In today's paper, there was a fluff column about doctors who insist on using their proper title even in social situations.

I'm friends with a doctor, and I call her by her first name in social situations. When I'm visiting a doctor, I probably call them Dr. So And So, but usually I don't address them by name because they are the only other one in the room, and if I'm talking, it must be to them.

In this column, they had this amusing bit:

“A physician is always addressed as Dr. so-and-so,” wrote Margaret S. Choa, MD. “It’s the proper title. Always. In any situation: business or social situations.”

Dr. Choa said that she was raised in the Chinese culture, a culture based on respect, where even siblings are identified by their respective places in the hierarchy. Wrote Dr. Choa: “Americans as a general rule do not respect titles because everyone is supposed to be equal. Ha! Inferior people are the only ones who want to be equal to superior ones.”

So my question is, should doctors be addressed with their proper title in social situations? Have they earned that courtesy after going through the long and difficult process of becoming a doctor? Or do we all put our pants on one leg at a time, and they should just be called Mr. or Mrs. So And So?

[Spexxvet]

U.N. Representative: So, Mr. Evil...
Dr. Evil: It's Dr. Evil, I didn't spend six years in Evil Medical School to be called "mister," thank you very much.

In a professional setting, I can them Dr., if they let me know that they are a dr. If I only know them socially, I call them by their first name.

The ones who correct you if you don't call them Dr. are usually not someone I would socialize with, anyway.

[smoothmoniker]

We make a big deal out of the title "Professor" for our undergrads, but our grad students call most of us by first name. It signals the transition from student to colleague.

In social settings, anybody who insists on a formal title is an ass.

[infinite monkey]

Please call me Generallissimo Doctor Major Poobah Infinite Monkey. kthx.

[footfootfoot]

I see this as an issue of rank and self importance. the AMA is essentially an exclusive guild. Had the trades in this country kept up with guilds, there'd be no DIY shops and doctors would address tradesmen as Master and Journeyman.

I know I am an equal in every regard to any doctor in my field of expertise. In my mind I am a peer if not a colleague. I usually call docs by thir first name unless they are much older than, in which case I call them Mr. (Just kidding)

[Gravdigr]

Originally Posted by footfootfoot

...I know I am an equal in every regard to any doctor in my field of expertise...

Humble, too.

[infinite monkey]

Originally Posted by Gravdigr

Humble, too.

*snicker*

[Clodfobble]

“A physician is always addressed as Dr. so-and-so,” wrote Margaret S. Choa, MD. “It’s the proper title. Always. In any situation: business or social situations.”

I suspect that her idea of a "social situation" is a formal cocktail party thrown by some rich dude who barely knows half his guests. If she makes the other moms at the soccer game call her "Dr. Choa"... well then I'd imagine it's not an issue, since they won't actually talk to her.

[glatt]

I just Googled her. She's older. So I can understand if she's Chinese and an older generation, she's going to have different attitudes. For what it's worth, I never heard of the medical school she attended. I wouldn't be bragging about being superior if I went to medical school in the tropics.

[casimendocina]

Originally Posted by glatt

I just Googled her. She's older. So I can understand if she's Chinese and an older generation, she's going to have different attitudes...

:nods: Her attitudes are cultural and generational so fair enough if she's within her own culture. Otherwise, I 'd agree with what everyone else has said.

[infinite monkey]

It's Doctor Evil, I didn't spend six years in Evil Medical School to be called "mister," thank you very much.

[sexobon]

I've met people for whom what they do for a living IS who they are. It's especially true of those who have forsaken other relationships in their devotion to a profession. If they want to be called by their title, I don't begrudge them that.

Yet for others, I may whimsically combine names and titles like ... glattiator!

[glatt]

Originally Posted by sexobon

Yet for others, I may whimsically combine names and titles like ... glattiator!

Glatt. The glatt meister. Glattiator. Making copies. Glatt...

[Sundae]

I wonder if sex counts as a social situation?

[Crimson Ghost]

Originally Posted by Sundae Girl

I wonder if sex counts as a social situation?

Only at a gang-bang or bukkake video shoot.

And if wine and cheese are served, it's most definitely a social situation.