what ever happened to good old porn flicks?

lumberjim · 03-29-2004, 03:08 PM

They don't make 'em like they used to.

All the tits are plastic. There are no plot lines. ( not even hokey ones). It's the same 5 guys in every movie. The scenes are repetitive, and too long. I personally am not turned on by 10 straight minutes of a shot from behind some guy's shaved sack.

Is anyone making good porn anymore?

be-bop · 03-29-2004, 04:04 PM

They don't make 'em like they used to.

Hey it's the digital age man , Make your own. I thought thats what Home Video was invented for......

Troubleshooter · 03-29-2004, 04:24 PM

Your best bet nowadays is the compilation DVD's. You can pick your flavor. If your depravity of choice is female, Latvian, lesbian transvestites there's bound to be a 4 hour compilation to suit your tastes.

Elspode · 03-29-2004, 04:42 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by be-bop
They don't make 'em like they used to.

Hey it's the digital age man , Make your own. I thought thats what Home Video was invented for......

]
Careful...this is Lumberjim you're talking about. Next thing you know, we'll have an Amateur Porn thread started in Lumberjim's Office...

SteveDallas · 03-29-2004, 04:46 PM

And the problem with that would be............

what, exactly???

perth · 03-29-2004, 04:47 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by SteveDallas
And the problem with that would be............

what, exactly???

You mean *besides* the possibility of seeing LJ in all his "glory"?

lumberjim · 03-29-2004, 04:52 PM

I'm afraid that even I would be grossed out by that.

SteveDallas · 03-29-2004, 05:07 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by perth

You mean *besides* the possibility of seeing LJ in all his "glory"?

Hmmm that would be a problem.... Hopefully he'd go the "Seymour Butts" route and simply handle the camera. (Speaking of which, "The Family Business" was worth a Netflix rental. Or at least the first disc was.)

perth · 03-29-2004, 05:17 PM

Hmmm. Is NetFlix worth the price? I've been tempted to try it out, but the thought of yet another monthly payment makes me cringe.

xoxoxoBruce · 03-29-2004, 05:34 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by lumberjim
There are no plot lines. ( not even hokey ones). It's the same 5 guys in every movie. The scenes are repetitive, and too long.

I didn't know that. I guess watching 3 minutes at a time, you miss those subtleties.

blue · 03-29-2004, 05:45 PM

3 minutes? Pfftttt! I could beat that.

And for the record I get credit for suggesting the amateur porn forum first.

lumberjim · 03-29-2004, 05:52 PM

blue, blue,blue....man is judged by his actions, not his words.

SteveDallas · 03-29-2004, 05:53 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by perth
Hmmm. Is NetFlix worth the price? I've been tempted to try it out, but the thought of yet another monthly payment makes me cringe.

It depends on how much you spend on video rentals and what you like. If you get a hot top seller a couple times a month, it's probably not worth it. If you you rent 5 or more a month and/or you're interested in other things besides the mega-hits, you should seriously consider Netflix. (There are also competing services like greencine.com and nicheflix.com for those who are REALLY into foreign/art things, but they tend to have slower turnaround time than Netflix since Netflix has different shipping locations around the country. Of course that depends on exactly where you live.)

Edit: Strictly in order to avoid thread hijacking, you also have xrentdvd.com.

Dagney · 03-29-2004, 06:19 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by SteveDallas
And the problem with that would be............

what, exactly???

Not enough bandwith for my butt **G**

lumberjim · 03-29-2004, 07:56 PM

amatuer porn is only tolerable to those starring in it. And that just barely. There are legends of hotels where the porn on your tv is the action in the room next door.

I'm thinking more along the lines of Behind the Green Door, and Deep throat. the "new porn" MIGHT have a premise, like a group of people at a resort or on a dude ranch, or girls in prison, but the mst appealing thing for me was always the lead up to the deed. A bit of graphic detail can be good, but you gotta keep those scenes brief, and then move to the next. The sexiest thing, IMO, is the whole "sex could happen anywhere" knid of thing. Like, you( I say "you" meaning the star of the film that you imagine yourself as) go to the dentist, and it's a Librarian Hot" dentist, and she ravishes you right in the chair, or you get pulled over by a female cop.....or you stumble into the dormitory of an all girls catholic college.....

the films they make now might as well be a guy calling a hooker, and banging her by the pool. there's no mystery....you KNOW they're gonna do it.

03-29-2004, 03:08 PM	#1
lumberjim I can hear my ears Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 25,571	what ever happened to good old porn flicks? They don't make 'em like they used to. All the tits are plastic. There are no plot lines. ( not even hokey ones). It's the same 5 guys in every movie. The scenes are repetitive, and too long. I personally am not turned on by 10 straight minutes of a shot from behind some guy's shaved sack. Is anyone making good porn anymore? __________________ This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality Embrace this moment, remember We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan Last edited by lumberjim; 03-29-2004 at 04:14 PM.

03-29-2004, 04:04 PM	#2
be-bop Operations Operative Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: scotland/uk Posts: 664	Re: what ever happened to good old porn flicks? They don't make 'em like they used to. Hey it's the digital age man , Make your own. I thought thats what Home Video was invented for......

03-29-2004, 04:24 PM	#3
Troubleshooter The urban Jane Goodall Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Florida Posts: 3,012	Your best bet nowadays is the compilation DVD's. You can pick your flavor. If your depravity of choice is female, Latvian, lesbian transvestites there's bound to be a 4 hour compilation to suit your tastes. __________________ I have gained this from philosophy: that I do without being commanded what others do only from fear of the law. - Aristotle

03-29-2004, 04:52 PM	#7
lumberjim I can hear my ears Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 25,571	I'm afraid that even I would be grossed out by that. __________________ This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality Embrace this moment, remember We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan

03-29-2004, 05:45 PM	#11
blue Operations Operative Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: Northern WI Posts: 739	3 minutes? Pfftttt! I could beat that. And for the record I get credit for suggesting the amateur porn forum first. __________________ If you spot a tornado, always remember to point at it, yell "tornado!", and run like hell.

03-29-2004, 04:46 PM	#5
SteveDallas Your Bartender Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Philly Burbs, PA Posts: 7,651	And the problem with that would be............ what, exactly???

03-29-2004, 05:17 PM	#9
perth Strong Silent Type Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Fort Collins, CO Posts: 1,949	Hmmm. Is NetFlix worth the price? I've been tempted to try it out, but the thought of yet another monthly payment makes me cringe.

03-29-2004, 05:52 PM	#12
lumberjim I can hear my ears Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 25,571	blue, blue,blue....man is judged by his actions, not his words. __________________ This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality Embrace this moment, remember We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan

03-29-2004, 07:56 PM	#15
lumberjim I can hear my ears Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 25,571	amatuer porn is only tolerable to those starring in it. And that just barely. There are legends of hotels where the porn on your tv is the action in the room next door. I'm thinking more along the lines of Behind the Green Door, and Deep throat. the "new porn" MIGHT have a premise, like a group of people at a resort or on a dude ranch, or girls in prison, but the mst appealing thing for me was always the lead up to the deed. A bit of graphic detail can be good, but you gotta keep those scenes brief, and then move to the next. The sexiest thing, IMO, is the whole "sex could happen anywhere" knid of thing. Like, you( I say "you" meaning the star of the film that you imagine yourself as) go to the dentist, and it's a Librarian Hot" dentist, and she ravishes you right in the chair, or you get pulled over by a female cop.....or you stumble into the dormitory of an all girls catholic college..... the films they make now might as well be a guy calling a hooker, and banging her by the pool. there's no mystery....you KNOW they're gonna do it. __________________ This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality Embrace this moment, remember We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan

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