Why Does My Reading Make People Mad?

[Juniper]

This is a phenomenon I've often noticed and I do not understand it; I wonder if other people have this experience. What is it about reading a book that makes other people so angry?

My parents always encouraged me to read. If I had a book in my lap, I got praise! And I often did. So it was rather surprising to find that the rest of the world doesn't feel the same.

My husband dislikes when I read. He says it's "antisocial."

If I am in public, say, in a waiting room, reading a book seems to attract everyone and make them desperate to talk to me. "What are you reading? What's that about? Oh, I never can find time to read. I like mysteries, don't you? Blah blah blah blah."

If I am relaxing somewhere, say, on a camping trip with friends when there isn't much going on - I mean seriously, people are just sitting and staring at a smouldering fire - if I read a book people get angry with me. "Nose in a book again!" they exclaim. "Don't you have anything else to do?"

And today, would you believe this? I was at my daughter's cheer competition and the woman in front of us (who I didn't know) actually said that I was STUPID for reading a book at a cheer competition. Yes, STUPID. I was flabbergasted. I guess I should have been watching all umptyzillion glittery, bow-headed girls' teams do their flips and pyramids instead of (gasp) READING. But come on! I had to be there for EIGHT HOURS both days this weekend. How many cheer routines can one person watch before they all blur together? I'd rather read, thanks. I'm reading a Phillipa Gregory novel.

Oh well. If reading makes me stupid, then put me on the short bus!

[Beestie]

Well, I just read your other post so I'll just reply to both of them here.

A lot of people here like to read.

A lot of people here like cute girls with short haircuts.

So, given that you have two things going for you right off the bat, maybe you should spend more time here.

[xoxoxoBruce]

Why Does My Reading Make People Mad?

Because you're an inconsiderate bitch for reminding them how lazy they are, and making them feel guilty about making excuses why they can't.

They try to engage you in conversation because they pity anyone so lonely and depressed that they have to resort to reading, not just a magazine, but a real book.

"Don't you have anything else to do?", is a tipoff that they feel reading a book is an act of desperation, to be resorted to only in cases of life threatening boredom.

You make me so mad, you, you, you bookworm you.

[DanaC]

'Cause they never learned just how much fun it is.

[ZenGum]

I have seen two cases of inappropriate reading in the last year.
One man was reading the newspaper, while driving his car in the city. He was an idiot.
Another man was also reading a newspaper, sitting on a blanket in the back half of the main crowd (about 20 thousand) at an outdoor music festival. It seemed a bit odd but, even with people standing and dancing all around him, who was I to judge?

Read away. Read proud. If someone tries to talk to you, wait for the gaps in their monologue and read to them from the book.

[Pie]

Hell, I read in meetings. It's the only way to keep from falling.... asleeeep...
People can be awfully rude, can't they? It's a manifestation of the anti-intellectual fervor that was sweeping the nation in the last decade (see also: the Bush administration).

You could respond with "Haven't you heard? It's cool to be smart again!"

[TheMercenary]

Originally Posted by xoxoxoBruce

Because you're an inconsiderate bitch for reminding them how lazy they are, and making them feel guilty about making excuses why they can't.

They try to engage you in conversation because they pity anyone so lonely and depressed that they have to resort to reading, not just a magazine, but a real book.

"Don't you have anything else to do?", is a tipoff that they feel reading a book is an act of desperation, to be resorted to only in cases of life threatening boredom.

You make me so mad, you, you, you bookworm you.

We have a winner. :p

[Shawnee123]

My husband dislikes when I read. He says it's "antisocial."

Juni, with all due respect: what the hell doesn't he give you a rash of shit about? Seriously, how dare you read with short hair. Sorry, that just rubs me the wrong way.

If I am in public, say, in a waiting room, reading a book seems to attract everyone and make them desperate to talk to me. "What are you reading? What's that about? Oh, I never can find time to read. I like mysteries, don't you? Blah blah blah blah."

Oh I hate that. Usually if someone says "what are you reading" I reply "a book" and show them the front cover if they're really interested in the title. "What's it about" causes me to bite my tongue to not say "something you probably wouldn't understand." I've never understood people who wait and just sit there, staring into space. Give me a pamphlet or something!

[Cloud]

Didn't we already have a thread like this?

I'm like you, and I always have something to read. At lunch, standing in line at the grocery store, at jury duty (the waiting part), etc. I always check that I have a book in my purse, or two, although now I have my iPhone it matters less, because I can always read on it.

I never understand why these other people aren't reading.

The antisocial part--why do people feel the need to jibber jabber constantly? Leave me alone--I'm not interested in your inanities!

It may be a simple dichotomy between introvert and extrovert between you and your husband. Extroverts feel the need to be surrounded by people; they get their energy renewed from group activities, conversations, etc. Introverts -- don't. We get our energy renewed from quiet activities and contemplation, e.g., reading. Obviously, introverts are rarer.

[Undertoad]

I was at a party for 5 hours on Saturday.

Torture

[lumberjim]

well...you didn't die from it

Juni,

reading can be rude....maybe your husband feels excluded from the world you travel to when you read? maybe he feels intimidated by your college attendance and shit like that?

[Juniper]

If we already had a thread like this, I apologize. That happens to me all the time on the cellar. I ought to know better--hell, I fit in here so well, chances are if I think of it, someone else already thunk of it.

Yes, LJ. I ought to stop attending classes and reading immediately so I can avoid offending the stupid people.

Indeed, he does not read he likes to, in theory, but it makes him sleepy...which happens to me when I don't get enough sleep too. I have suspected that this college thing does intimidate him a bit, but that's just too bad. I don't know a damn thing about cars, plumbing or electrical work, but he doesn't intimidate me when he's installing a new toilet.

[lumberjim]

Originally Posted by Juniper

If we already had a thread like this, I apologize. That happens to me all the time on the cellar. I ought to know better--hell, I fit in here so well, chances are if I think of it, someone else already thunk of it.

Yes, LJ. I ought to stop attending classes and reading immediately so I can avoid offending the stupid people.

wtf? get yer boot out of my ass.

i was just offering a possible reason for his resenting your reading. if you don't care, then......fuck it!

[Juniper]

No no no.....I should have put in a smiley! Sorry LJ, I didn't mean it that way.

[glatt]

Originally Posted by Juniper

My husband dislikes when I read. He says it's "antisocial."

He's right. You simply can't socialize if your attention is on reading a book. When you are reading, you are not socializing. You can't do both at the same time.

When a person reads, they are checking out of reality for a while. It's fun. I like to read. It's escapism. But you can escape too much. I don't know you or your husband. But if he's saying you are being anti-social by reading, he probably feels like you aren't paying enough attention to him. I know my wife doesn't like it when I spend a lot of time on the computer. She says it makes me distant.