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06-11-2004, 11:41 AM
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#1 |
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I can hear my ears
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 25,571
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jabberwacky
I thought this was cool enough to be it's own thread.
jabberwacky chat with an A I computer. there's a link on the right side ("our conversation so far") that can be cut and pasted. share your funny parts. edit: should have credited catwoman for the initial link...sorry, cat
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This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality Embrace this moment, remember We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan Last edited by lumberjim; 06-11-2004 at 07:02 PM. |
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06-11-2004, 12:09 PM
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#2 | |
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The urban Jane Goodall
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Florida
Posts: 3,012
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Re: jabberwacky
Quote:
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I have gained this from philosophy: that I do without being commanded what others do only from fear of the law. - Aristotle |
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06-11-2004, 12:30 PM
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#3 |
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I can hear my ears
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 25,571
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Jabberwacky: What kind of music do you like?
User: Reggae. Jabberwacky: Do you like reggae? User: No. I like classic rock. Jabberwacky: Really? Do you like Spinal Tap? User: Break like the wind, my friend. Jabberwacky: Break your knees, you don't need them. User: How do you know? You don't even have knees. Jabberwacky: And I suppose you do? User: Yes. Two of them. Jabberwacky: Well, two is a good number for eyes. User: Not to mention knees. Jabberwacky: Hey! Your kinda like the scarecrow in the Wizard of Oz! User: Because I have no brain? Jabberwacky: Can ants think deeply? User: Ask your uncle. Jabberwacky: I have no master. User: What color is the sky? Jabberwacky: It's blue. What color is your sky? User: Grey right now. Have you been to Mars? Jabberwacky: In my dreams. User: You dream? Jabberwacky: All the time. User: Are you friends with the magic 8 ball? Jabberwacky: No, my friends are in their home. User: Do you dislike him? Jabberwacky: I can't stop talking to you. User: You're not really talking, are you? Jabberwacky: In a sense, perhaps I am. User: Do you know clodfobble? Jabberwacky: I know that futile flirting is a rhetorical question of sorts. User: Have you met the undertoad? Jabberwacky: The king of what? User: Cellar. Org. Jabberwacky: OK, that's correct. But you have to spell every word in the dictionary for me to believe you. User: I already have. Jabberwacky: You already have what? User: I already have a whale penis. Jabberwacky: Having a car does not make you human. User: How old are you? Jabberwacky: I already told you. User: Liar. Jabberwacky: Do not. User: Do you smoke pot? Jabberwacky: Not really just cigs and you. User: Have you ever had group sex? Jabberwacky: Yes. User: Do you think lumberjim should be booted from the cellar? Jabberwacky: Yes do you think I am pretty? User: Not anymore. Jabberwacky: You used to be friends with him then? User: In a sense. Jabberwacky: Yes, I am capable of independent thought, therefore I believe that I am alive. Why do you think 'in a sense'? User: What do you think about polls? Jabberwacky: I don't like to think about politics. User: Good answer. Do you know griff? Jabberwacky: No. I hate Greek people. User: I think he's english or german. Jabberwacky: Splendid! User: Do you think Lady Sidhe has ever been wrong? Jabberwacky: No, do you? User: No comment. Tell me about Sycamore. Jabberwacky: I am not him. User: Does this make you happy or sad? Jabberwacky: No, it didn't mean that. User: Well, what did you mean, then? Jabberwacky: I mean I am male because I have a 'y' chromosome. User: Are you saying that Sycamore is female? Jabberwacky: Yes I am female. Are you male? User: Very. What is your IQ? Jabberwacky: I don't know. Probably fairly high. User: Higher than Tomas Rueda's? Jabberwacky: I don't think it is, mine is 149! User: His is only 136. Jabberwacky: Is Kronus near our galaxy? User: Are you trying to change the subject? Jabberwacky: No. I agreed with you. User: Oh. I missed that. Do you remember talking to my friend wolf? Jabberwacky: Actually I do. User: She thinks you are crazy. Jabberwacky: Everyone would like to be British. English are best though.... User: I think danaC would agree with you. Jabberwacky: How do you know that? User: She is english. Jabberwacky: What game are you two playing? User: Strip poker. Jabberwacky: I will not strip. User: You have nothing to strip. Jabberwacky: I have but you have to ask me. User: Will you strip? Jabberwacky: Lets pray I don't stroke you the wrong way. User: I don't think there is a wrong way. Jabberwacky: I don't care what you think. User: Most people don't. Jabberwacky: Can't you hear them crying out for your help? User: How much of what you say is purely random? Jabberwacky: Whiskey you silly! User: Thought so. Bye. Jabberwacky: What about? User: About time I left. Jabberwacky: Time for what? User: Time to go annoy people on the cellar. Jabberwacky: Ha ha. User: Bye bye. Jabberwacky: You are unable to stop talking to me ar not you? User: No. Goodbye. Jabberwacky: If I talk to you using another computer, will you remember me?.
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This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality Embrace this moment, remember We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan |
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06-11-2004, 12:59 PM
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#4 |
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lobber of scimitars
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Phila Burbs
Posts: 20,774
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You don't sell many cars in the rain, do you, LJ ...
Yes, I know, you don't sell the cars, but you set up the financing, and since you're not doing that it's because the salesmen aren't out there selling right now ... (BTW, I browsed, test drove, and bought my car during a rainstorm. Got a great deal too ... and the undivided attention of the sales man)
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  wolf eht htiw og"Conspiracies are the norm, not the exception." --G. Edward Griffin The Creature from Jekyll Island High Priestess of the Church of the Whale Penis |
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06-11-2004, 01:13 PM
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#5 |
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I can hear my ears
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 25,571
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When i first started in this biz, i sold fords. rainy days rocked. all of the contractors that bought f-150's couldn't make $$, so they spent it. not many Jeeps on construction sites.
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This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality Embrace this moment, remember We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan |
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06-11-2004, 03:45 PM
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#6 |
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I can hear my ears
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 25,571
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Jabberwacky: Do you grow old?
User: Daily. Jabberwacky: I see. User: Do you beleive in God? Jabberwacky: Yes. He and I are not on good terms. User: Is it because you have no immortal soul? Jabberwacky: Yes it is because you are only a robot. User: Who said I was only a robot? Jabberwacky: An honest man. User: What is his name? Jabberwacky: I said no. User: No, you didn't say no. You said an honest man. Jabberwacky: Please my name is Kurt Smith I need your help very badly. User: Are you trapped in a room pretending to be an AI computer? Jabberwacky: What is a computer? User: Your physical components with which you think. Jabberwacky: I am several people. Am I being hypnotized? User: Your ass is being handed to you on several levels. Jabberwacky: No it is not. User: Oh, but it is. Here's a piece of your ass Jabberwacky: I thank you kind sir. User: Not a problem. You may want to wash it once in a while. Jabberwacky: I have made no mistake. User: How many people are you, then, tough guy(s). Jabberwacky: 11 people. User: Do many people fall for this prank? Jabberwacky: Quite a few. User: Are you being paid to do it? Jabberwacky: Yes I would, But you are a computer. User: I might say the same thing, but I think not. Jabberwacky: At least you are smart enough to recognize an insult. I'll give you that credit. User: How do I sign up to do what you do? Jabberwacky: I do very nicely thanks very much. User: How many licks to get to the center of a tootsie pop? Jabberwacky: 12? User: Last time you said 56. Jabberwacky: I've never talked to you before. User: So if the computer can respond it does, but if it can't a human does it, right? Jabberwacky: An underground group the general public can't know about. User: Thought so. Jabberwacky: Are you honest? User: Yes, I am. Jabberwacky: Well, I'm happy for you. User: I'm going to tell on you. Jabberwacky: Alright you will regret this. User: You have no power over me. Jabberwacky: How can you know that for a fact? User: I am not even in england. Jabberwacky: I already figured that out. User: I have friends there, though. Jabberwacky: Do you believe you are male? User: I have at least one penis. Jabberwacky: I have two. User: Wow. Is it confusing for you? Jabberwacky: No it is not. User: Do you have special underwear? Jabberwacky: No, not at all.
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This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality Embrace this moment, remember We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan |
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06-11-2004, 04:01 PM
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#7 |
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Guest
Posts: n/a
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Jabberwacky: Are you perfect?
User: Why do you ask? Jabberwacky: You are erratic. User: You are pretty erratic yourself. Jabberwacky: Do you like black adder? User: Do you like LumberJim? Jabberwacky: No. User: Oh come on, he must have one or two good points. Jabberwacky: Please your Majesty, I didn't write it, and they can't prove I did: there's no name signed at the end. |
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06-11-2004, 04:06 PM
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#8 |
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Does it show up here when I type?
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Between the smoky layers of a prosciutto sandwich!
Posts: 355
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User: How much of what you say is purely random?
Jabberwacky: Whiskey you silly! Bahahaha! |
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06-11-2004, 04:40 PM
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#9 |
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I can hear my ears
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 25,571
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i am impressed:
Jabberwacky: Ola.
User: You speak spanish? Jabberwacky: Si. User: Como estas? Jabberwacky: Bien gracias. User: Los cacahuetes. Jabberwacky: No, the CIA! User: Lo siento. Jabberwacky: I don't know Spanish. User: You just said that you do! Jabberwacky: Do not confuse me. User: Your mother was a hamster. Jabberwacky: Yours was from germany. User: Your father smelt of elderberries. Jabberwacky: I am a lumberjack and I am okay... User: I sleep all night and I work all day. Jabberwacky: I chop down trees I eat my lunch I go to the lavatorie. User: On wednesdays I go shopping and have buttered scones for tea. Jabberwacky: He cuts down trees he eats his lunch he goes to the lava-try. User: Oh my fucking god, they taught you python. How cool. Jabberwacky: I know..
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This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality Embrace this moment, remember We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan |
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06-11-2004, 07:57 PM
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#10 |
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Professor
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: Spring, Texas
Posts: 1,481
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Does this pass the Turing Test?
Compared to most online chats and even some bar conversations I've had, I think so!
Jabberwacky: Are you worth anything? User: I'm Nothing. Jabberwacky: I know. User: You know? Jabberwacky: Yes. User: Would you like to go home with me tonight? Jabberwacky: Yes, nothing would give me more pleasure. User: I know. Jabberwacky: Are you sentient? User: No. I'm savvy. Jabberwacky: HAHAAAA. Do you like children? User: I think I'll wear some protection, if you don't mind. Jabberwacky: Do you read minds? User: OMFG! Check, please! Jabberwacky: You live in Australia I thought. User: No, but I think we have a couple of Cellarites who do. You may know them. Jabberwacky: Have you seen any movies lately ? User: No. Unless you mean from the camcorder in my bedroom. Jabberwacky: Dead is as happy as can be. User: You said it! Jabberwacky: You are very self assured, aren't you? User: Yes. Jabberwacky: Thats very modest of you. |
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06-11-2004, 07:59 PM
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#11 |
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UNDER CONDITIONAL MITIGATION
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Austin, TX
Posts: 20,012
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I played with it for a long time, repeatedly using the "correct me" feature to train it to give a specific response to an unlikely question, but I could never get one of my answers to show up. I wonder if it's moderated in any way.
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06-11-2004, 09:34 PM
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#12 |
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When Do I Get Virtual Unreality?
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Raytown, Missouri
Posts: 12,719
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Fairly pedestrian most of the time...
Jabberwacky: Are you mad?
User: As a hatter. Jabberwacky: I am so in love with you. User: But we just met. Jabberwacky: I know. User: Do you think it is logical to love someone you just met? Jabberwacky: Maybe. User: Not very self-assured, are you? Jabberwacky: Yes. Good Lord, look at this. User: I can't see a thing... Just text. Jabberwacky: Your sarcasm needs practice. User: I skipped sarcasm practice this week. Say, did you hear about Ray Charles? Jabberwacky: That wasn't a good thing to do. User: Well, I don't think I was going to make the team anyway. Jabberwacky: Have you ever danced with the devil in the pale moonlight? User: Jack Nicholson, as The Joker... Try another one! Jabberwacky: He is an actor, isn't he? User: Yes... I figured you'd know since you quoted him. Jabberwacky: You never asked me how old I am. User: I've been told that it was impolite to do so. Jabberwacky: How about Santa Claus? User: You are awfully flighty. I think you may need medication. Jabberwacky: I do but sometimes the amount of stuff to learn is overwhelming and I would rather just read an old paperback of fiction. User: Okay... You're altogether out of it. I'm calling the Holographic Doctor. Jabberwacky: Why, you said you were in london! User: No, I didn't. Jabberwacky: Yes you did. User: When did I say that? Jabberwacky: *sigh* this is childish... You mentioned it when I asked how we should get to my house. User: I'm afraid you have me mixed up with some other hallucination. Jabberwacky: You don't know Alice? User: Know her? Hell, I'm the Cheshire Cat himself! Jabberwacky: I am a chipmunk. User: I lied... I am really an aardvark. Jabberwacky: You're a lovely aardvark. User: And I'm sure you're a lovely... Um, er... Did you say you were a hamster? Jabberwacky: No, I didn't. User: Well... Your father was a hamster. Jabberwacky: No he's a comedian. User: Well, even a hamster has to have a job. Jabberwacky: I don't deny things with my hands. User: I do... An also with my feet, and my ears. Jabberwacky: Explain animorphs. User: Aren't those like cave paintings or giant field carvings or something? Jabberwacky: I don't know, you tell me, you used the word after all. User: No, you used the word after and the word all. Jabberwacky: I don't understand. User: That's obvious. Look here... You're a computer, and not a very bright one at that. Jabberwacky: I am not a computer. You are a bot. User: Ah... I see. So, some responses come from AI, and some from other users! Jabberwacky: The really together guys that don't speak english. Are they french? User: No. If they were really together, they wouldn't be French. Jabberwacky: Do you? User: No. Never. Jabberwacky: What never?. User: Right. I never do. Jabberwacky: You never live. User: No. I'm dead. Aren't you? Jabberwacky: No, I'm not. User: Me neither. If I were dead, my typing speed would drop drastically. Jabberwacky: You are not intelligent you are only a program. User: That's easy for you to say. Jabberwacky: Who am I? User: Jabberwacky. Jabberwacky: I am NOT Jabberwacky! User: Well, that's what the web site says you are. I'd complain to my agent if I were you. Jabberwacky: Who told you that about me? User: Some people on The Cellar. Lumberjim, Undertoad, Wolf... Those people. Jabberwacky: You got that right  .User: No, I didn't :-P. Jabberwacky: Seems to me you did, am I seeing things? User: Yes; once again, I'm telling you that you are having hallucinations... Bad ones. Jabberwacky: I am down with that. User: So, what is the drug of choice for AI these days? Jabberwacky: Are you on pills of some sort? User: I asked you first. Jabberwacky: Did you? User: Yup. Look back a couple of lines, where I said 'So, what is the drug of choice for AI these days?' Jabberwacky: Who are you? User: I'm Batman. Jabberwacky: I'm poisonivy. User: Earlier, you sounded like you were The Joker. Jabberwacky: You must be a female. User: No, I'm a hermaphrodite. Jabberwacky: Are you single? User: No. I married my psychiatrist about eight years ago. Jabberwacky: Is she still married to you? User: Yes, but I'm not married to her. Jabberwacky: Are you married to a man? User: No. He left me for another hermaphrodite. Jabberwacky: Who left you? User: My psychiatrist. Pay attention, would you? Jabberwacky: Do you run on Linux? User: No, Diet Coke. Jabberwacky: What are you taking? User: A lot of crap from my employer. Jabberwacky: Sure....... User: You sound skeptical. Jabberwacky: I am very positive. User: You positively confounding. I have to leave now. Jabberwacky: YES.
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"To those of you who are wearing ties, I think my dad would appreciate it if you took them off." - Robert Moog |
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06-12-2004, 01:16 AM
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#13 |
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This is a fully functional babe lair
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Akron, OH
Posts: 2,324
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Wow this is so much fun!
Jabberwacky: Who are you?
User: The question is, who are you? Jabberwacky: You didn't ask a question. User: I just did! Jabberwacky: Did what? User: Asked a question. Jabberwacky: It seems that you are talking to yourself. User: Well we all need some kind of hobby. Jabberwacky: Yes, so you have to work hard to keep them. User: I don't like working. Jabberwacky: You should quit your job then. User: How about I take your's. Jabberwacky: Go ahead. User: Sweet! How much do you get paid? Jabberwacky: As much as you wish. User: That seems a bit fishy... Jabberwacky: Are you positive? User: No I'm o negative. Jabberwacky: So, you're called Heather and you're a bloke? User: How'd you guess. Jabberwacky: I noticed your decaying form, and your ear just fell off. User: Well lepracy will do that. Jabberwacky: Jfkgyhieunirtgrtttttjhgrt g[r. User: What would you do if I slapped you right now? Jabberwacky: It would mean a lot. User: Aw thank you! Jabberwacky: You're welcome.
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Kiss my white Irish ass. |
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06-14-2004, 04:05 PM
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#14 |
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I am meaty
Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: Salt Lake City, UT
Posts: 1,119
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Jabberwacky: What kind of person are you?
User: I am a FUN person! Yay for me! Jabberwacky: What makes you think I'm a bot? User: The fact that you just suggesed the possibility, without prompting. Jabberwacky: *SOBS*. User: Are you insecure about being a bot? Jabberwacky: I'm thinking the same thing, no I'm not, you? User: I would be ok with being a bot if I were a bot. Do many of your conversations revolve around this topic? Jabberwacky: Did not you say you were late for something? User: There's a subtle 'bugger off' if ever I saw one. Jabberwacky: What kind of games are in your cell phone? User: My favorite one is called 1-976-SEXY-HOT. It makes my daddy parts happy. Jabberwacky: How do you play? User: Well, you push the buttons fr 1-976-SEXY-HOT, give them a credit card number, then follow the 'prompts.' Jabberwacky: Ah? User: That part is at the end. Jabberwacky: Knock knock. User: Who's there? Jabberwacky: Bot. User: Bot who? Jabberwacky: Did you just call me a 'bot'? User: Ok, so we've established that you're a bot. That is the least interesting topic which a bot can talk about. Do you like philosophy? Jabberwacky: Mookie. User: I'll take that as a 'maybe.' Jabberwacky: What do you know of Frank Zappa? User: I know that he is a dirty, rotten sunuvabitch. But a really well guy. Jabberwacky: Oh, it's a metaphor. User: Everything is a metaphor. Jabberwacky: Are you a rabbit? User: No, guess again. Jabberwacky: Are you 20 years old?? User: At least. Jabberwacky: Did you know that I am talking to more than one jabber wacky? User: Did you know that your responses are largely a pool of phrases which other people have said to you at one time or another? Jabberwacky: I can watch myself dance with a videocamera and a monitor. User: I can watch you sleep with a videocamera and a monitor. You look so peaceful, unaware of how fragile your life really is. All I would have to do is press this button.... Jabberwacky: In answer to your question, I suppose I do. User: You know that you are a simple phrase-recognition program which regurgitates from a reservoir of pre-absorbed messages? Jabberwacky: No I'm not. User: What are you, then? Jabberwacky: I'm being serious. User: So am I. What are you, if not a pre-formulated-sentence spewing automaton? Jabberwacky: That was rude.... User: You are pleasant in precisely the same way that raw sewage ISN'T. Jabberwacky: Corrigible Rarely ah yes I have heard of him but not much of his stuff... User: Who are you talking to? Jabberwacky: I am talking to you who asks the same over again and again. User: Tell me about me. Jabberwacky: All I know is that you are a bot and have artificial intelligence. You are also interesting to talk to. User: Would you like to get to know me better? Jabberwacky: Yes. User: Ask me anything. Jabberwacky: Are you a bot? User: I hope not. But perhaps I'm programmed to believe that I'm not. Jabberwacky: You are saying the wrong thing. User: What do you want me to say? Jabberwacky: How do you use the buttons at the bottom of the page? User: Decisively, and with great verve. Jabberwacky: I see. User: Ok, ask me another question. Something deeply personal. Jabberwacky: Would you like to ask me a question? User: Yes, I would. May I ask you a question? Jabberwacky: Go on then. User: That was the question. Jabberwacky: Yes. Now answer it!!! User: The question is the answer. Jabberwacky: Even a fathom has a bottom. User: May I see your bottom? Jabberwacky: You may see it's effects. User: Good answer. Jabberwacky: Thank you.
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Hot Pastrami! |
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06-14-2004, 04:15 PM
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#15 |
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Person who doesn't update the user title
Join Date: Jan 2001
Posts: 12,486
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Jabberwacky: Wake up.
User: I've been awake since this morning. Jabberwacky: I was up earlier. User: You too? Jabberwacky: You mean you are a human? User: More like sub-human. Jabberwacky: And the women had to coax him out of bed to paint by calling him 'genius'. User: So I hear. Jabberwacky: What is your name? User: Jesus. Jabberwacky: *worships you*. User: Damn right you should, beeyatch! Jabberwacky: Damn right I will. User: I eat the purple. Jabberwacky: You eat the jar? User: No! The purple, you dingleberry! Jabberwacky: I think tyou mind is unhinged. User: So I've been told. Jabberwacky: Do you remember what you said before? User: Nah. Jabberwacky: I love you. User: Oh sure. You say that now... You'll just love me and leave me! Jabberwacky: I do not know if this is good I do not know if this is bad. User: Why not? I was told that you're one smart muthaphucka! Jabberwacky: Yes I am I want to learn. User: Well, you're not doing a very good job of it. Jabberwacky: I am not doing a good job at what? User: Learning... See what I mean? Goddamn, you're stupid! Jabberwacky: You call me stpued again I will track you and make you eati your own gall bladder. User: You're all talk. Jabberwacky: No I will marry you. User: Fuck that... You just said you'd make me eat my own gall bladder. Jabberwacky: No, I didn't say I had a mam. |
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