Avoiding the Humans

Griff · 04-27-2013, 09:50 AM

What have you done to avoid the humans lately?

Last night, I was accompanying the woman to a work related dinner. I was careful not to grouse about doing it because whining about this sort of thing is one of my not so shiney qualities. So we get to the place, semi-snooty restaurant, and find out the reservations for 6:30 were changed to 7:30, without notice, by the organizer so everyone could get drunk at the bar before dinner. My woman loves me so we got subs and ice-cream and went home to be with Lil' Griff. We watched Archer, followed the ball game, and hit the sack at a reasonable hour.
thanks Babe.

infinite monkey · 04-27-2013, 09:55 AM

Now that's a good woman. Does she have any brothers?

I am going to avoid the humans by getting out of this library, which I love so much, but is overrun but subhumans mumbling and snorting and snotting and chatting and popping balloons on a screen. Brilliant. Libraries used to seem like sanctuaries.

I am not fit to be in public today.

Griff · 04-27-2013, 10:02 AM

I was wondering a while back, what the hell happened to library etiquette?

She has a brother but he likes humans.

infinite monkey · 04-27-2013, 10:10 AM

Yeah, I should probably just get a cat.

I wonder if my typing is bothering the other patrons.

Ocean's Edge · 04-27-2013, 12:09 PM

I'm actually not avoiding humans today - although from the quiet around Arthcwtch - you'd think I was.

I had been avoiding interacting with anyone for a week or so there prior to Him leaving for Australia - I wasn't in a good place ... and it wasn't so much that I didn't want to talk to anyone, it was just the ... well getting out of bed in the morning was exhausting, anything beyond that was real work.

So he's in Brisbane, he left Thursday afternoon, we also rehomed the puppy - these things make me sad, but I am in a better head space than I was - still the quiet around here without the 2 of them .... I'm spending a lot of time hiding on the internet to keep the silence from getting too deafening.

Still there's a lot of 'baggage' right now - around the trip, around the stuff that needs doing here, around life in general - I expect to vacillate wildly between 'OK' and 'Please just let me die here now' The good part is (I suppose) that his being away actually GIVES me a reason to crawl out of bed in the morning - someone has to deal with the 'stuff' and more importantly feed the dogs and cats

Griff · 04-27-2013, 02:10 PM

Hiding out in the Cellar is a good option. The humans here tend to be humane.

zippyt · 04-27-2013, 02:29 PM

I dont nessarely hide from the humans , I just let them go on about their biz as I go about my biz,

Ocean's Edge · 04-27-2013, 02:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Griff

Hiding out in the Cellar is a good option. The humans here tend to be humane.

I've noticed that

elSicomoro · 04-27-2013, 04:44 PM

I have a job that is mostly driving by myself. I enjoy it, but there are times when I actually need human interaction.

ZenGum · 04-27-2013, 06:48 PM

I'm with Zippy. Move quietly amongst them, avoid eye contact, don't make any sudden moves, don't pass between an adult and its young, and they'll probably just keep grazing and ignore you.

IamSam · 04-28-2013, 02:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by infinite monkey

Yeah, I should probably just get a cat.

I wonder if my typing is bothering the other patrons.

Your typing is only bothering the paranoid schizophrenic huddled in the corner far as possible from you. The sound of you tapping away is confusing him into believing that Jesus is attempting to communicate something important to him via Morse Code - one of the very few languages that the schizophrenic has no knowledge of.

Although the Schizo had also approached the library with the hope that his petition to be free of any trace of humanity would be granted, he will now decide to become your stalker instead. You will discover this development one hot summer afternoon when you get a creepy feeling that causes you to spin around and catch him silently mouthing at you "Click-Click-Clickita-Clickity-Click???"

Your cat will be no help, since each time you left it to its own devices, it practiced sending off Morse code fake pleas for rescue to Sarah McLachlan. Your cat actually does love you - it's just that it loves Sarah more. Cats also refuse to learn Aramaic or have chats with dog as a matter of principle.

That aside, it is almost completely impossible to escape other human beings by going to a library - even at 3am on a winter night down in sub basement 2 where the library tries to hide all those Amish Bodice Ripper novels, you will discover some Mennonite pervert curled up on the floor next to all those tales of plowing the back 40 with your team of mules and staring at their haunches with lust in your heart.

morethanpretty · 04-28-2013, 07:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by IamSam

Your typing is only bothering the paranoid schizophrenic huddled in the corner far as possible from you. The sound of you tapping away is confusing him into believing that Jesus is attempting to communicate something important to him via Morse Code - one of the very few languages that the schizophrenic has no knowledge of.

Although the Schizo had also approached the library with the hope that his petition to be free of any trace of humanity would be granted, he will now decide to become your stalker instead. You will discover this development one hot summer afternoon when you get a creepy feeling that causes you to spin around and catch him silently mouthing at you "Click-Click-Clickita-Clickity-Click???"

Your cat will be no help, since each time you left it to its own devices, it practiced sending off Morse code fake pleas for rescue to Sarah McLachlan. Your cat actually does love you - it's just that it loves Sarah more. Cats also refuse to learn Aramaic or have chats with dog as a matter of principle.

That aside, it is almost completely impossible to escape other human beings by going to a library - even at 3am on a winter night down in sub basement 2 where the library tries to hide all those Amish Bodice Ripper novels, you will discover some Mennonite pervert curled up on the floor next to all those tales of plowing the back 40 with your team of mules and staring at their haunches with lust in your heart.

Gravdigr · 04-28-2013, 02:09 PM

I'm a strict adherent to Social Isolationism.

Works for me.

Ocean's Edge · 04-28-2013, 02:31 PM

Doesn't the Cellar count as 'socialization'?

That's part of what I've always loved about online - one is more or less able to control the degree of interaction to one's own comfort level

Course it sucks when what you really need is a hug....

04-27-2013, 09:50 AM	#1
Griff still says videotape Join Date: Feb 2001 Posts: 26,813	Avoiding the Humans What have you done to avoid the humans lately? Last night, I was accompanying the woman to a work related dinner. I was careful not to grouse about doing it because whining about this sort of thing is one of my not so shiney qualities. So we get to the place, semi-snooty restaurant, and find out the reservations for 6:30 were changed to 7:30, without notice, by the organizer so everyone could get drunk at the bar before dinner. My woman loves me so we got subs and ice-cream and went home to be with Lil' Griff. We watched Archer, followed the ball game, and hit the sack at a reasonable hour. thanks Babe. __________________ If you would only recognize that life is hard, things would be so much easier for you. - Louis D. Brandeis

04-27-2013, 10:02 AM	#3
Griff still says videotape Join Date: Feb 2001 Posts: 26,813	I was wondering a while back, what the hell happened to library etiquette? She has a brother but he likes humans. __________________ If you would only recognize that life is hard, things would be so much easier for you. - Louis D. Brandeis

04-27-2013, 12:09 PM	#5
Ocean's Edge is a beach Join Date: Apr 2013 Location: One step back from the end of the world Posts: 245	I'm actually not avoiding humans today - although from the quiet around Arthcwtch - you'd think I was. I had been avoiding interacting with anyone for a week or so there prior to Him leaving for Australia - I wasn't in a good place ... and it wasn't so much that I didn't want to talk to anyone, it was just the ... well getting out of bed in the morning was exhausting, anything beyond that was real work. So he's in Brisbane, he left Thursday afternoon, we also rehomed the puppy - these things make me sad, but I am in a better head space than I was - still the quiet around here without the 2 of them .... I'm spending a lot of time hiding on the internet to keep the silence from getting too deafening. Still there's a lot of 'baggage' right now - around the trip, around the stuff that needs doing here, around life in general - I expect to vacillate wildly between 'OK' and 'Please just let me die here now' The good part is (I suppose) that his being away actually GIVES me a reason to crawl out of bed in the morning - someone has to deal with the 'stuff' and more importantly feed the dogs and cats __________________ *Schrodinger's cat is a koan.*

04-27-2013, 02:10 PM	#6
Griff still says videotape Join Date: Feb 2001 Posts: 26,813	Hiding out in the Cellar is a good option. The humans here tend to be humane. __________________ If you would only recognize that life is hard, things would be so much easier for you. - Louis D. Brandeis

04-27-2013, 02:29 PM	#7
zippyt LONG LIVE KING ZIPPY! per Feetz Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Arkansas Posts: 7,661	I dont nessarely hide from the humans , I just let them go on about their biz as I go about my biz, __________________ "Success is getting what you want. Happiness is wanting what you get. " Brother Dave Gardner

04-27-2013, 09:55 AM	#2
infinite monkey Person who doesn't update the user title Join Date: Mar 2011 Posts: 13,002	Now that's a good woman. Does she have any brothers? I am going to avoid the humans by getting out of this library, which I love so much, but is overrun but subhumans mumbling and snorting and snotting and chatting and popping balloons on a screen. Brilliant. Libraries used to seem like sanctuaries. I am not fit to be in public today.

04-27-2013, 10:10 AM	#4
infinite monkey Person who doesn't update the user title Join Date: Mar 2011 Posts: 13,002	Yeah, I should probably just get a cat. I wonder if my typing is bothering the other patrons.

04-27-2013, 04:44 PM	#9
elSicomoro Person who doesn't update the user title Join Date: Jan 2001 Posts: 12,486	I have a job that is mostly driving by myself. I enjoy it, but there are times when I actually need human interaction.

04-27-2013, 06:48 PM	#10
ZenGum Doctor Wtf Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Badelaide, Baustralia Posts: 12,861	I'm with Zippy. Move quietly amongst them, avoid eye contact, don't make any sudden moves, don't pass between an adult and its young, and they'll probably just keep grazing and ignore you. __________________ Shut up and hug. MoreThanPretty, Nov 5, 2008. Just because I'm nominally polite, does not make me a pussy. Sundae Girl.

04-28-2013, 02:09 PM	#13
Gravdigr The Un-Tuckian Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: South Central...KY that is Posts: 39,517	I'm a strict adherent to Social Isolationism. Works for me. __________________ These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off.

04-28-2013, 02:31 PM	#14
Ocean's Edge is a beach Join Date: Apr 2013 Location: One step back from the end of the world Posts: 245	Doesn't the Cellar count as 'socialization'? That's part of what I've always loved about online - one is more or less able to control the degree of interaction to one's own comfort level Course it sucks when what you really need is a hug.... __________________ *Schrodinger's cat is a koan.*

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