I have been on the wagon for a while now, but I definitely feel like stepping off today. I guess its holiday depression and the fact that my ride to my AA meeting never showed, but I'm feeling like fuck this. I'm sitting in my apartment all alone and there's no one to care if I go buy a pint of peppermint schnapps. Its very hard not having a car and being disabled, and sometimes - like today, things get the best of me. Maybe I'll just go curl up on the bed with my cats and take a nap and I'll feel better when I wake up. I am really trying to do this sobriety thing, but I feel very near defeat today.