What is the whiniest, most horrible song EVER?

[infinite monkey]

Diary by Bread is pretty whiny, but that was the times. There was also a song about giving your love a cherry or something.

I found her diary underneath a tree.
and started reading about me.
The words began stick and tears to flow.
Her meaning now was clear to see.
The love she'd waited for was someone else not me
Wouldn't you know it, she wouldn't show it.


Why the fuck was her diary underneath a tree? Was she homeless? Is the image supposed to invoke a fairyland where people floated around and wrote diaries in tree-dotted meadows, with butterflies and rainbows, where happy little bunnies hopped around bringing ribbons of gold?

They were going to call it "She's just not that into you" but they weren't sure that had lasting value, like diaries under trees.