Haggard CURED

Flint · 02-07-2007, 04:20 PM

One of four ministers who oversaw three weeks of intensive counseling for the Rev. Ted Haggard said the disgraced minister emerged convinced that he is "completely heterosexual." And baby Jesus raised his tiny, fat baby fist in victory! The menace of teh ghey has been banished back to Hell, where it belongs. Let this be a lesson to those evil-doers who would "recruit" our children: baby Jesus is coming for you. Get cured, or get bashed. Your call.

xoxoxoBruce · 02-07-2007, 05:09 PM

Quote:

It was also the oversight board that strongly urged Haggard to go into secular work.

Maybe teaching school or helping coach a boys team.

Cloud · 02-07-2007, 05:36 PM

This whole thing had me laughing hysterically while it was happening.

However,

Bruce, with respect--I know your comment is meant to be humorous but--please do not equate homosexuality with pedophilia. They are not the same orientation at all, and the affair (if you can call it that) Haggard had was with an adult male. The idea that all homosexual men prey on little boys is inaccurate, unfair, and helps perpetuate prejudice and hatred against this segment of society.

Cloud--striking a blow against violence! er . . .

Further edit: Hope this doesn't get me in trouble! It's my 69th post! I once got thrown off a cat lover's forum, because I said I had my cat's "balls chopped off" and I was told, with extreme frostiness, that it was "a family forum."

Ibby · 02-07-2007, 07:05 PM

Hahhahahahhahaha, this is about as far from a 'family' forum as you can get...

I think Stewart's take on this is the best. "You know how when you were a kid, to keep you from smoking, if your dad caught you with a cigarrette... he'd make you smoke the whole carton? ... ..."

Ronald Cherrycoke · 02-07-2007, 07:15 PM

One of four ministers who oversaw three weeks of intensive counseling for the Rev. Ted Haggard said the disgraced minister emerged convinced that he is "completely heterosexual.

At least that`s what he is telling his wife and congreagation.

Cloud · 02-07-2007, 07:21 PM

it would be a much better story if he came out completely converted, wanting to spread the word-God Loves Queers!

Now that I'd believe.

Ronald Cherrycoke · 02-07-2007, 07:24 PM

One of four ministers who oversaw three weeks of intensive counseling for the Rev. Ted Haggard said the disgraced minister emerged convinced that he is "completely heterosexual.

That`s his story....and he`s sticking to it!

cowhead · 02-08-2007, 07:10 AM

uh huh.. the whole thing has struck me as just plain silly.. perhaps little baby jesus uses shock therapy? lightning bolts from the sky? no no wait.. that was zues. personally I don't think baby jesus or even the older model would give one whit if a person were 'gay' (still bugs me that I am now very limited in using that word.. bastards co-opting a good word! and besides.. I have known quite a few homosexuals that wouldn't even be described chipper...) so long as that person were a decent human being.

Spexxvet · 02-08-2007, 08:54 AM

Curiously, it takes only two weeks to be cured of Christianity.

Tonchi · 02-08-2007, 04:35 PM

I think they probably have him wearing a patch now, to be sure he doesn't do any backsliding when tempted. Something like the Nicoret patch only made from the body sweat of gay men, prevents cravings, ya' know?

Trilby · 02-08-2007, 04:45 PM

Oh, you Unbelievers. You'll be sorry one day.

Spexxvet · 02-08-2007, 04:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tonchi

I think they probably have him wearing a patch now, to be sure he doesn't do any backsliding when tempted. Something like the Nicoret patch only made from the body sweat of gay men, prevents cravings, ya' know?

Or a chastity belt, with butt plug included.

Shawnee123 · 02-08-2007, 04:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ronald Cherrycoke

That`s his story....and he`s sticking to it!

Yeah, he's stickin' sumpin to sumpin! :p

footfootfoot · 02-08-2007, 07:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Spexxvet

Or a chastity belt, with butt plug included.

That vibrates when he strays...

Cloud · 02-08-2007, 08:15 PM

no, that would be an incentive.

02-07-2007, 04:20 PM	#1
Flint Snowflake Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Dystopia Posts: 13,136	Haggard CURED One of four ministers who oversaw three weeks of intensive counseling for the Rev. Ted Haggard said the disgraced minister emerged convinced that he is "completely heterosexual." And baby Jesus raised his tiny, fat baby fist in victory! The menace of teh ghey has been banished back to Hell, where it belongs. Let this be a lesson to those evil-doers who would "recruit" our children: baby Jesus is coming for you. Get cured, or get bashed. Your call. __________________ **************** There's a level of facility that everyone needs to accomplish, and from there it's a matter of deciding for yourself how important ultra-facility is to your expression. ... I found, like Joseph Campbell said, if you just follow whatever gives you a little joy or excitement or awe, then you're on the right track. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Terry Bozzio**

02-07-2007, 05:36 PM	#3
Cloud ... Join Date: Feb 2007 Posts: 8,360	This whole thing had me laughing hysterically while it was happening. However, Bruce, with respect--I know your comment is meant to be humorous but--please do not equate homosexuality with pedophilia. They are not the same orientation at all, and the affair (if you can call it that) Haggard had was with an adult male. The idea that all homosexual men prey on little boys is inaccurate, unfair, and helps perpetuate prejudice and hatred against this segment of society. Cloud--striking a blow against violence! er . . . Further edit: Hope this doesn't get me in trouble! It's my 69th post! I once got thrown off a cat lover's forum, because I said I had my cat's "balls chopped off" and I was told, with extreme frostiness, that it was "a family forum." Last edited by Cloud; 02-07-2007 at 06:17 PM.

02-07-2007, 07:05 PM	#4
Ibby erika Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: "the high up north" Posts: 6,127	Hahhahahahhahaha, this is about as far from a 'family' forum as you can get... I think Stewart's take on this is the best. "You know how when you were a kid, to keep you from smoking, if your dad caught you with a cigarrette... he'd make you smoke the whole carton? ... ..." __________________ not really back, you didn't see me, i was never here shhhhhh

02-08-2007, 07:10 AM	#8
cowhead halve your cake and eat it too. Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Georgia.. by way of Lawrence Kansas Posts: 1,359	uh huh.. the whole thing has struck me as just plain silly.. perhaps little baby jesus uses shock therapy? lightning bolts from the sky? no no wait.. that was zues. personally I don't think baby jesus or even the older model would give one whit if a person were 'gay' (still bugs me that I am now very limited in using that word.. bastards co-opting a good word! and besides.. I have known quite a few homosexuals that wouldn't even be described chipper...) so long as that person were a decent human being. __________________ no my child.. this is not my desire..I'm digging for fire.

02-08-2007, 08:54 AM	#9
Spexxvet Makes some feel uncomfortable Join Date: Dec 2005 Posts: 10,346	Curiously, it takes only two weeks to be cured of Christianity. __________________ "I'm certainly free, nay compelled, to spread the gospel of Spex. " - xoxoxoBruce

02-07-2007, 07:15 PM	#5
Ronald Cherrycoke Master Locutor Join Date: Jan 2007 Posts: 153	One of four ministers who oversaw three weeks of intensive counseling for the Rev. Ted Haggard said the disgraced minister emerged convinced that he is "completely heterosexual. At least that`s what he is telling his wife and congreagation.

02-07-2007, 07:21 PM	#6
Cloud ... Join Date: Feb 2007 Posts: 8,360	it would be a much better story if he came out completely converted, wanting to spread the word-God Loves Queers! Now that I'd believe.

02-07-2007, 07:24 PM	#7
Ronald Cherrycoke Master Locutor Join Date: Jan 2007 Posts: 153	One of four ministers who oversaw three weeks of intensive counseling for the Rev. Ted Haggard said the disgraced minister emerged convinced that he is "completely heterosexual. That`s his story....and he`s sticking to it!

02-08-2007, 04:35 PM	#10
Tonchi Victim of gravity Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: Hiding in plain sight Posts: 1,412	I think they probably have him wearing a patch now, to be sure he doesn't do any backsliding when tempted. Something like the Nicoret patch only made from the body sweat of gay men, prevents cravings, ya' know? __________________ Everything you've ever heard about Fresno is true.

02-08-2007, 04:45 PM	#11
Trilby Slattern of the Swail Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 15,654	Oh, you Unbelievers. You'll be sorry one day. __________________ In Barrie's play and novel, the roles of fairies are brief: they are allies to the Lost Boys, the source of fairy dust and ...They are portrayed as dangerous, whimsical and extremely clever but quite hedonistic. "Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked and, jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her. —James Barrie Wimminfolk they be tricksy. - ZenGum

02-08-2007, 08:15 PM	#15
Cloud ... Join Date: Feb 2007 Posts: 8,360	no, that would be an incentive. __________________ "Guard your honor. Let your reputation fall where it will. And outlive the bastards!"

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