Ciara

[Undertoad]

Ciara, I read your diary entries... despite all that has happened, you had the presence of mind to do what would really help you. You were resourceful and went about things smartly. WAY TO GO!

Now be patient as it will not get better overnight, but it will get better.

[Ciara]

Thank you for your kind words. Finally some more kind words from the cellar. I am definately doing alot better, of course not all is perfect. Right now I am working on thinking more positive. Doctor's orders. So far I am doing quite well with it.

[Undertoad]

Well, the Cellar is a community first and has to protect itself as a community first. You know how it's like with online places... people are ALWAYS trying to mess with them. So new people are always treated harshly until the community knows they are not harmful.

The positive thinking WORKS! But it does take time, that's why I say patience. No doubt you want things to get better RIGHT AWAY. But you will find that it varies from day to day. The occasional "setback" is to be expected, and the important thing is not to beat yourself up if you have a bad day.

It also takes Paxil several months to really have a complete effect.

alt.support.anxiety-panic is a fine resource of helpful folks, if you have Usenet access.

[mw451]

That's the ticket, keep your chin up and keep thinking positive. Life is great, and we all should enjoy it to the fullest.

Unfortunately, we humans tend to make mistakes and overlook the little things that are important to getting the most out of life. Take time to stop and smell the roses...

Also, I saw the link to your weblog, and read parts of it. You are definitely on a much better track than you were before. Keep it up and don't sweat the small stuff. Best of luck to you.

[juju]

Your internal dialog definitely has a giant impact on your overall mood and outlook on life. Most times we don't even realize the horrible things we're saying to ourselves in our head. We just know it's been a "bad day". But if you can catch yourself and alter that dialog, you can make some amazing changes.

[Ciara]

Actually I have been on paxil for more than a year. getting blood tests every other month to make sure there is no damage to my liver. I am on a pretty high dosage. I also take nerve pills for very bad days. I was wonderful all year on meds. I couldn't even believe the me who was me! I loved me. But I do have my moments. I was thinking insanely over the holidays. I snapped. I feel like I am getting no where, and no where fast. I feel like time is running out, but have no idea why. My brother lost his job, his boss had just packed up and left. he did not get fired or do anything in the wrong. I have problems with obssessing, so his problem of being out of a job, became more annoying to me than him. My mother was here, and she is negative ALL the time. I couldn't really afford Christmas. There is alot more also. Everything was just piling up, and I snapped. I know I will still have my days, and sometimes it might even be days at a time. But I feel better knowing that the doctor can help me. It gives me something to look forward too. Before I couldn't see any solution except to kill myself. But thank God, I know better than that, and never would act out on it. I just needed desperately to talk to someone. I was dying on the inside.