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02-22-2008, 01:18 PM
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#226 |
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changed his status to single
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Right behind you. No, the other side.
Posts: 10,308
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Zap! There is no evil in the world. Unfortunately you aren't here to enjoy the pristine planet without a single human to be found.
I wish I had more time to enjoy my boys.
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Getting knocked down is no sin, it's not getting back up that's the sin |
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02-23-2008, 07:07 PM
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#227 |
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to live and die in LA
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Los Angeles
Posts: 2,090
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You gain an extra 5 minutes to enjoy your boys as the police mistakenly go to the wrong house first.
I wish I could have a rational conversation with people about politics.
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to live and die in LA |
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02-24-2008, 06:39 AM
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#228 |
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still says videotape
Join Date: Feb 2001
Posts: 26,813
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You have dozens of trenchant conversations each day for the rest of your life. Welcome to the nuthouse.
I wish I could tell which Presidential candidate would be good for the country.
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If you would only recognize that life is hard, things would be so much easier for you. - Louis D. Brandeis |
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02-24-2008, 10:40 AM
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#229 |
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UNDER CONDITIONAL MITIGATION
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Austin, TX
Posts: 20,012
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You know with absolute prescient certainty which candidate will do the best job.
They lose. I wish I could sleep for longer than 2 hours at a time. |
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02-24-2008, 11:59 AM
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#230 |
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to live and die in LA
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Los Angeles
Posts: 2,090
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You sleep longer, much longer, and wake up 20 years later with Prince Charming's tongue in your mouth.
I wish I could figure out which process is flooding the swap space on my Debian server.
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to live and die in LA |
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02-26-2008, 04:20 PM
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#231 |
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Sir Post-A-Lot
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 439
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You find out to your horror it was a small part of a world-wide DDOS attack by a group of script kiddies.
I wish that Dwayne Johnson would be in a great, great movie that surpasses Arnold in Terminator 2 as best performance by an athlete. Last edited by deadbeater; 02-26-2008 at 05:11 PM. |
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02-28-2008, 08:03 AM
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#232 |
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Abhorrent Aberrant
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Central Arkansas
Posts: 27
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Poof! The Tooth Fairy is a block buster hit but much to your consternation, Dwayne has a penchant for the same sex.
I wish people would stop littering the highways.
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Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup. 
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02-28-2008, 08:07 AM
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#233 |
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We have to go back, Kate!
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Yorkshire
Posts: 25,964
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Kazzam! You wake up in the morning to find that you are the last human being on earth and there is nobody to litter the highways ever again.....
I wish my student loans/grants were higher. |
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02-28-2008, 11:24 AM
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#234 |
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to live and die in LA
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Los Angeles
Posts: 2,090
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Your students loans are much higher, much much higher, but it's because they keep bogarting your weed, leaving you dry, with no way to pass philosophy.
I wish someone (other than me) would tell my wife about the upcoming holiday, "Steak and BJ Day".
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to live and die in LA |
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02-28-2008, 12:06 PM
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#235 |
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Why, you're a regular Alfred E Einstein, ain't ya?
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 21,206
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Your wife finds out about Steak and BJ day, but, misunderstanding what that day is about, takes you to a Steakhouse whose entertainment is an old guy who does BJ Thomas cover songs.
I wish I could fly like an eagle.
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A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones who need the advice. --Bill Cosby |
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08-07-2013, 05:45 PM
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#236 |
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Larger than life and twice as ugly.
Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 5,264
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You can fly like an eagle, but Steve Miller sues you for copyright infringement.
I wish I could get a full nights sleep.
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We must all go through a rite of passage. It must be physical, it must be painful, and it must leave a mark. I have no knowledge of the events which you are describing, and if I did have knowledge of them, I would be unable to discuss them with you now or at any future period.   Don't waste your time always searching for those wasted years |
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08-07-2013, 05:48 PM
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#237 |
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The future is unwritten
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 71,105
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You need someone to suck that insomnia out of you.
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The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump. |
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08-07-2013, 09:59 PM
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#238 |
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shed door curio
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Canada
Posts: 406
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You can't get a good nights sleep because the people in the motel room beside you are having a three way, and all you can hear is "In the ass, in the ass...while Pink Floyd is singing Comfortably Numb cranked to the tits.
I wish I was 29 again.... |
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08-08-2013, 08:36 AM
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#239 |
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UNDER CONDITIONAL MITIGATION
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Austin, TX
Posts: 20,012
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You are 29 again... 29 days.
I wish it would be under 100 degrees outside today. |
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08-08-2013, 02:03 PM
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#240 | |
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Larger than life and twice as ugly.
Join Date: Apr 2004
Posts: 5,264
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Quote:
__________________
We must all go through a rite of passage. It must be physical, it must be painful, and it must leave a mark. I have no knowledge of the events which you are describing, and if I did have knowledge of them, I would be unable to discuss them with you now or at any future period. Don't waste your time always searching for those wasted years |
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