A case of mistaken orientation

[Elspode]

I've never been hit on by a guy. I think that, for some reason, I project this massive hetero wave or something. I know *lots* of gay people, many of them close friends, so I know I don't radiate homophobic vibes (don't really have any of which I'm aware...my father was bi, and we had lots of female impersonators around the house when I was growing up).

I am, however, also utterly unaware when women are flirting with me. I just figure it is completely impossible, so I don't notice it. Mrs. Elspode, on the other hand, has pointed out to me a few such incidents which she observed as being particularly flagrant on the part of other women, so I guess it does happen, if her judgement is to be believed.

I dunno. I'm not much to look at, I don't have money, I dress poorly, I'm rather aged and coarse, so what's to like?