Funny/Embarrassing things they say - Page 75

Gravdigr · 12-04-2018, 03:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by monster

I can't sneeze in less than 600 words".

Sounds like a female to me.

Griff · 12-04-2018, 10:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by monster

PoloGirl (College senior) is taking a dull, non-genius-level class to complete her ?science requirement for graduation. Something to do with the environment and people.... All other students are taking it for the same reason. She was telling me that the prof is clearly not used to having students who can write. He's set a homework that's a minimum 600 words, and told the class "don't worry if you're struggling, you can treat it as a series of long-answer questions and not string them together as an essay. Just start writing, you'll be amazed at how much you can actually write".

She said "my problem is getting it down to 600. I can't sneeze in less than 600 words". I larfed.

Ha!

Lil' Griff said the same thing (well not the sneezing bit) about the essay she wrote to get into grad school. There is such a range of expectations out there with some schools still asking so very little that you need to know your audience.

Gravdigr · 12-04-2018, 03:32 AM

Yeah I warped the thread, Precious. Turned it around even.

Popdigr went to visit Grandmadigr at the home (she'll be 101 in Feb

) and she was in what would be the dayroom if it were a jail, and there was old Mrs. Doe sitting in a wheelchair beside her. Mrs. Doe was married to Mr. Doe, a preacher, for like 70-some odd years. Sweetest-looking li'l old lady you ever did see. One of the nurses was trying to get her to finish as much of her lunch as she could:

"Mrs. Doe can't ya get the rest of this Ensure down? You really need to finish it."

Mrs. Doe replied with, and I quote:

"Now look here you cock-sucking bitch, I told you I was done, and I'm done. Now get that shit away from me."

Popdigr said venom dripped from every word.

True Story™.

Clodfobble · 12-04-2018, 10:48 AM

But haven't you heard? EVERYONE should go to college!

Griff · 12-04-2018, 12:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Clodfobble

But haven't you heard? EVERYONE should go to college!

My bass playing nephew dropped out of college to focus on his playing but is also apprenticing part-time as an electrician. He's smarter than most.

Undertoad · 12-04-2018, 01:31 PM

That's a great combination. I should have done it.

At least a third of bar gigs have questionable power available for you. "Everybody plug into this outlet"

One outdoor place a few years ago handed us a single, very frayed extension cable for everything

Griff · 12-04-2018, 05:38 PM

xoxoxoBruce · 12-05-2018, 12:45 AM

My buddy has 8 full time plumbers working for him, each one gets a van, tools and gas. None went to college, one is a convicted felon due to a youthful indiscretion. They all work unsupervised most of the time, make 6 figures a year, and will never be unemployed unless they want to.

Another thing is most of the trades people are at least 40, more likely 50 to 60ish and nobody coming up to replace them.

Griff · 12-05-2018, 06:50 AM

Robots will not be plumbing old houses any time soon.

monster · 09-02-2019, 10:34 PM

At work today, received a text from Thunderboy, lost and hence late for orientation for his new term time job (lifeguard at u of m).... "Fucking shitting fuck nuggets, I can't find the fucking building". No doubt about his family tree then.... :Lol:

Griff · 09-03-2019, 06:14 AM

monster · 09-03-2019, 11:03 PM

It's that he's chronically late and still took the time to type that which amuses me the most. I think. Although it would have been better to just fucking call me for help....

monster · 05-05-2020, 08:41 PM

21yo son decided to teach 18yo son to cook chicken sauce w pasta tonight. Bless.

Fortunately my mouth was empty when I overheard this gem:

"You know the correct term for cooked pasta? Al dente? yeah, ok... ...you just don't want it to be like ...you know... floppy dick"

BigV · 05-05-2020, 08:45 PM

BWAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!

Gravdigr · 05-05-2020, 09:53 PM

Lol!!

Well, who likes floppy dick?!

12-04-2018, 03:32 AM	#3
Gravdigr The Un-Tuckian Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: South Central...KY that is Posts: 39,517	Funny/Embarrassing things they say - From The Old Folks' Home Edition Yeah I warped the thread, Precious. Turned it around even. Popdigr went to visit Grandmadigr at the home (she'll be 101 in Feb) and she was in what would be the dayroom if it were a jail, and there was old Mrs. Doe sitting in a wheelchair beside her. Mrs. Doe was married to Mr. Doe, a preacher, for like 70-some odd years. Sweetest-looking li'l old lady you ever did see. One of the nurses was trying to get her to finish as much of her lunch as she could: "Mrs. Doe can't ya get the rest of this Ensure down? You really need to finish it." Mrs. Doe replied with, and I quote: "Now look here you cock-sucking bitch, I told you I was done, and I'm done. Now get that shit away from me." Popdigr said venom dripped from every word. True Story™. __________________ These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off.

12-04-2018, 10:48 AM	#4
Clodfobble UNDER CONDITIONAL MITIGATION Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Austin, TX Posts: 20,012	But haven't you heard? EVERYONE should go to college! __________________ My book My other book My spirit animal

12-04-2018, 05:38 PM	#7
Griff still says videotape Join Date: Feb 2001 Posts: 26,813	__________________ If you would only recognize that life is hard, things would be so much easier for you. - Louis D. Brandeis

12-05-2018, 12:45 AM	#8
xoxoxoBruce The future is unwritten Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 71,105	My buddy has 8 full time plumbers working for him, each one gets a van, tools and gas. None went to college, one is a convicted felon due to a youthful indiscretion. They all work unsupervised most of the time, make 6 figures a year, and will never be unemployed unless they want to. Another thing is most of the trades people are at least 40, more likely 50 to 60ish and nobody coming up to replace them. __________________ The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump.

12-05-2018, 06:50 AM	#9
Griff still says videotape Join Date: Feb 2001 Posts: 26,813	Robots will not be plumbing old houses any time soon. __________________ If you would only recognize that life is hard, things would be so much easier for you. - Louis D. Brandeis

12-04-2018, 01:31 PM	#6
Undertoad Radical Centrist Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Cottage of Prussia Posts: 31,423	That's a great combination. I should have done it. At least a third of bar gigs have questionable power available for you. "Everybody plug into this outlet" One outdoor place a few years ago handed us a single, very frayed extension cable for everything

09-02-2019, 10:34 PM	#10
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	At work today, received a text from Thunderboy, lost and hence late for orientation for his new term time job (lifeguard at u of m).... "Fucking shitting fuck nuggets, I can't find the fucking building". No doubt about his family tree then.... :Lol: __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

09-03-2019, 06:14 AM	#11
Griff still says videotape Join Date: Feb 2001 Posts: 26,813	__________________ If you would only recognize that life is hard, things would be so much easier for you. - Louis D. Brandeis

09-03-2019, 11:03 PM	#12
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	It's that he's chronically late and still took the time to type that which amuses me the most. I think. Although it would have been better to just fucking call me for help.... __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

05-05-2020, 08:41 PM	#13
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	21yo son decided to teach 18yo son to cook chicken sauce w pasta tonight. Bless. Fortunately my mouth was empty when I overheard this gem: "You know the correct term for cooked pasta? Al dente? yeah, ok... ...you just don't want it to be like ...you know... floppy dick" __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

05-05-2020, 08:45 PM	#14
BigV Goon Squad Leader Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Seattle Posts: 27,063	BWAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAA! __________________ Be Just and Fear Not.

05-05-2020, 09:53 PM	#15
Gravdigr The Un-Tuckian Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: South Central...KY that is Posts: 39,517	Lol!! Well, who likes floppy dick?! __________________ These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off.

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