Merry F'in Christmas - I want a divorce. - Page 15

lookout123 · 02-22-2006, 08:22 PM

she filed. bitch.

what is the medical term for when it feels like your heart has been ripped out through your eyesocket then set ablaze right in front of you? fortunately, my dear wife was there to piss on my heart so it wouldn't burn too long.

02-22-2006, 08:42 PM

Damn, Lookout. Just DAMN! I am SO sorry! Well, you gave her every chance and tried your best. Now's the time to fight like a tiger for the sake of your boy and yourself. Good luck, man.

Dagney · 02-22-2006, 10:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lookout123

she filed. bitch.

what is the medical term for when it feels like your heart has been ripped out through your eyesocket then set ablaze right in front of you? fortunately, my dear wife was there to piss on my heart so it wouldn't burn too long.

Lookout, I'm really sorry to hear this. I was hoping it would turn out a much different way.

I'll keep good thoughts thoughts coming for you and LilLookout.

lookout123 · 02-22-2006, 11:21 PM

she waited to file until my annual profit sharing bonus came through. she's had the paperwork ready for awhile. gotta love sleazy lawyers, selfish bitches, and community property states. i will walk away with next to no liquid assets until the house sells or she is able to refi. wooohooo - rental living, here i come.

slang · 02-22-2006, 11:25 PM

It's been a while since I read through here Lookout. Sorry to hear about all of this.

Most sincere best wishes man.

Clodfobble · 02-22-2006, 09:22 PM

I'm really sorry, Lookout. I hope the next few months go by quickly for you.

wolf · 02-23-2006, 12:42 AM

Sorry, lookout.

Trilby · 02-23-2006, 06:01 AM

I wish there was someting I could say or do to ease your pain, lookout. My thoughts and prayers are with you and the little guy. You won't feel this way forever, my friend.

FallenFairy · 02-23-2006, 06:22 AM

Sorry lookout - this is never easy but you are in my Prayers.

Undertoad · 02-23-2006, 06:53 AM

The five stages of death and mourning also apply to divorce.

1. Denial and Isolation
2. Anger
3. Bargaining
4. Depression
5. Acceptance

You can skip a step or two (there was no bargaining in mine) but accept the basic idea that you will be continuing to go through the emotional ringer.

After that things will start to get radically better!

Undertoad · 02-23-2006, 07:08 AM

The best advice anyone gave me was, if some thoughts seem to be overwhelming, just ignore them for the time being. You can delay worrying about stuff - not forever, but you don't have to consume yourself with how you're going to cope with X today. Leave that to next month and just drop the worry entirely.

I sort of wish I had been forced to move out. Instead, she volunteered to move out as part of the split of things, I'm left with all the house and furniture and color schemes and wallpaper etc. that I only half picked out or in some cases didn't pick out at all. Stuck in a life I only half made and am partly disgusted by, is a strange feeling and bits of it remain even years later. I hate my dishes for example. As a pretty fierce individualist I would prefer to have my own choices around.

You can say oh damn back to apartment life, or you can say, thank god I don't have to try to maintain the lifestyle that we built together, because it turns out that was sort of bogus; and I am suddenly granted the wonderful luck of not having that sort of reminder everywhere I look and the favor of building a life that is fresh and new and all my own.

lookout123 · 02-23-2006, 07:42 AM

thanks, all. starting over fresh has its pro's i know. as i type i have tears in my eyes because the family room couch is right in front of me. we picked that out when we first got to arizona. we spent countless nights laughing and talkign about the future on it. it was the piece of furniture my son leaned against the first time he stood up.

am i overly sentimental? yep. i want it for all those reasons. i don't want it for all those reasons. this house we are in we designed together, decorated together, etc.

yesman065 · 02-23-2006, 08:33 AM

Sorry Lookout, but I've been out for just over a month and a 1/2 and it is getting a little better each day. Two steps forward and 1 back - its just the way it goes. I've cried myself to sleep many a night and others I'd just stay up till I passed out. I'm not sure if this helps, but the bad days are getting fewer and farther apart. I miss my kids so much. But the pain will ease and you will live and, believe it or not, love again. One friend said a divoce is like a forest fire. In the beginning it is all crazy and out of control, then there is nothing but destruction. Then finally, new life beins to grow from the ashes. . . . . Good luck, my friend.

Pie · 02-23-2006, 09:18 AM

I'm so sorry to hear this, lookout. My best wishes for you and your boy.

footfootfoot · 02-23-2006, 07:44 PM

Hey lookout,
I'm sure it's not the money but the extra drop in your esteem of her that hurts the most. Remember that this isn't the woman you fell in love with and married. She is sick and her actions and motivations are colored by her illness and her lawyer's greed and are not indicative of her true nature.

Don't let the pain get the upper hand. Adults get mired in the past, kids are living now. Take a cue from your son.

And like Beestie said, you've got the whole cellar behind you.

02-23-2006, 12:42 AM	#7
wolf lobber of scimitars Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Phila Burbs Posts: 20,774	Sorry, lookout. __________________ wolf eht htiw og "Conspiracies are the norm, not the exception." --G. Edward Griffin The Creature from Jekyll Island High Priestess of the Church of the Whale Penis

02-23-2006, 06:22 AM	#9
FallenFairy nope Join Date: Jan 2006 Posts: 322	Sorry lookout - this is never easy but you are in my Prayers. __________________ ~going, going... gone now

02-23-2006, 09:18 AM	#14
Pie Gone and done Join Date: Sep 2001 Posts: 4,808	I'm so sorry to hear this, lookout. My best wishes for you and your boy. __________________ per·son \ˈpər-sən\ (noun) - an ephemeral collection of small, irrational decisions The fun thing about evolution (and science in general) is that it happens whether you believe in it or not.

02-23-2006, 07:44 PM	#15
footfootfoot To shreds, you say? Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: in the house and on the street-how many, many feet we meet! Posts: 18,449	Hey lookout, I'm sure it's not the money but the extra drop in your esteem of her that hurts the most. Remember that this isn't the woman you fell in love with and married. She is sick and her actions and motivations are colored by her illness and her lawyer's greed and are not indicative of her true nature. Don't let the pain get the upper hand. Adults get mired in the past, kids are living now. Take a cue from your son. And like Beestie said, you've got the whole cellar behind you. __________________ The internet is a hateful stew of vomit you can never take completely seriously. - Her Fobs

02-22-2006, 08:22 PM	#1
lookout123 changed his status to single Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Right behind you. No, the other side. Posts: 10,308	she filed. bitch. what is the medical term for when it feels like your heart has been ripped out through your eyesocket then set ablaze right in front of you? fortunately, my dear wife was there to piss on my heart so it wouldn't burn too long.

02-22-2006, 08:42 PM	#2
marichiko Guest Posts: n/a	Damn, Lookout. Just DAMN! I am SO sorry! Well, you gave her every chance and tried your best. Now's the time to fight like a tiger for the sake of your boy and yourself. Good luck, man.

02-22-2006, 11:21 PM	#4
lookout123 changed his status to single Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Right behind you. No, the other side. Posts: 10,308	she waited to file until my annual profit sharing bonus came through. she's had the paperwork ready for awhile. gotta love sleazy lawyers, selfish bitches, and community property states. i will walk away with next to no liquid assets until the house sells or she is able to refi. wooohooo - rental living, here i come.

02-22-2006, 11:25 PM	#5
slang St Petersburg, Florida Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 3,423	It's been a while since I read through here Lookout. Sorry to hear about all of this. Most sincere best wishes man.

02-22-2006, 09:22 PM	#6
Clodfobble UNDER CONDITIONAL MITIGATION Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Austin, TX Posts: 20,012	I'm really sorry, Lookout. I hope the next few months go by quickly for you.

02-23-2006, 06:01 AM	#8
Trilby Slattern of the Swail Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 15,654	I wish there was someting I could say or do to ease your pain, lookout. My thoughts and prayers are with you and the little guy. You won't feel this way forever, my friend.

02-23-2006, 06:53 AM	#10
Undertoad Radical Centrist Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Cottage of Prussia Posts: 31,423	The five stages of death and mourning also apply to divorce. 1. Denial and Isolation 2. Anger 3. Bargaining 4. Depression 5. Acceptance You can skip a step or two (there was no bargaining in mine) but accept the basic idea that you will be continuing to go through the emotional ringer. After that things will start to get radically better!

02-23-2006, 07:08 AM	#11
Undertoad Radical Centrist Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Cottage of Prussia Posts: 31,423	The best advice anyone gave me was, if some thoughts seem to be overwhelming, just ignore them for the time being. You can delay worrying about stuff - not forever, but you don't have to consume yourself with how you're going to cope with X today. Leave that to next month and just drop the worry entirely. I sort of wish I had been forced to move out. Instead, she volunteered to move out as part of the split of things, I'm left with all the house and furniture and color schemes and wallpaper etc. that I only half picked out or in some cases didn't pick out at all. Stuck in a life I only half made and am partly disgusted by, is a strange feeling and bits of it remain even years later. I hate my dishes for example. As a pretty fierce individualist I would prefer to have my own choices around. You can say oh damn back to apartment life, or you can say, thank god I don't have to try to maintain the lifestyle that we built together, because it turns out that was sort of bogus; and I am suddenly granted the wonderful luck of not having that sort of reminder everywhere I look and the favor of building a life that is fresh and new and all my own.

02-23-2006, 07:42 AM	#12
lookout123 changed his status to single Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Right behind you. No, the other side. Posts: 10,308	thanks, all. starting over fresh has its pro's i know. as i type i have tears in my eyes because the family room couch is right in front of me. we picked that out when we first got to arizona. we spent countless nights laughing and talkign about the future on it. it was the piece of furniture my son leaned against the first time he stood up. am i overly sentimental? yep. i want it for all those reasons. i don't want it for all those reasons. this house we are in we designed together, decorated together, etc.

02-23-2006, 08:33 AM	#13
yesman065 Banned - Self Imposed Join Date: Dec 2005 Posts: 1,847	Sorry Lookout, but I've been out for just over a month and a 1/2 and it is getting a little better each day. Two steps forward and 1 back - its just the way it goes. I've cried myself to sleep many a night and others I'd just stay up till I passed out. I'm not sure if this helps, but the bad days are getting fewer and farther apart. I miss my kids so much. But the pain will ease and you will live and, believe it or not, love again. One friend said a divoce is like a forest fire. In the beginning it is all crazy and out of control, then there is nothing but destruction. Then finally, new life beins to grow from the ashes. . . . . Good luck, my friend.

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