There's lumberthing I want to tell you - Page 101

Clodfobble · 05-16-2019, 09:56 PM

Gooooo Jim and Amanda!

lumberjim · 05-16-2019, 10:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by xoxoxoBruce

It's certainly a boner worthy property.

I certainly hope you score so you'll have the facilities to entertain us all.

The parties will be epic. That side yard, and the pool.... And hey, sleep over, there's plenty of room. We'll keep the flower pots off the stairs just for you.

xoxoxoBruce · 05-16-2019, 11:17 PM

Can you do that, I thought it was mandatory in Jersey, some kind of law.

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Doesn't look like there's any railings anyway.
Doesn't look like you can reach the pool from the lower roof, even with a running start, either.

lumberjim · 05-17-2019, 12:19 AM

No, but you certainly could hit it off the wood shop roof.

We're already discussing the deck I'll build, and improvements to the pool area.

And, if they have that open house, we're going to send people over there to talk bad about it.

xoxoxoBruce · 05-17-2019, 12:31 AM

We have an experienced deck builder to call on, but he'd probably screw up the plumbing.

An awful tough place to badmouth, what could you say that would sound even remotely feasible?

Clodfobble · 05-17-2019, 08:02 AM

You could say they're selling because someone was murdered there?

lumberjim · 05-17-2019, 08:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by xoxoxoBruce

We have an experienced deck builder to call on, but he'd probably screw up the plumbing.

An awful tough place to badmouth, what could you say that would sound even remotely feasible?

I've built a deck or two myself, if you recall.

There are imperfect aspects of the place... No central AC, for one. Some folks don't want a pool, or koi pond. (you do them up like catfish, I guess?). It's really too big, and heating it might cost more than a smaller house... And the landscaping is pretty out of control....

I kind of feel like the pictures they posted are from right after they bought it, in December of 17, and they haven't done shit since. They paid 374, so I'm hoping they take a small profit and run with it. I'm going to go bonkers waiting to hear back today.

Gravdigr · 05-17-2019, 10:40 AM

lumberjim · 05-17-2019, 01:17 PM

I spoke to Chris (our agent) today, and he's spoken to theirs. They got another offer last night. fuckshitdamnpisshell.

Their agent tells mine that the homeowner wants to have that open house before countering any offers. He said both offers are good, and the selling agent wants her to forget the open house, and focus on the 2 offers. But it's the sellers's call. I looked her up on facebook, figuring she was in the local facebook group Merchantville Matters, and she is. Looks like a princess, and the husband looks like a frog. Only there 1.5 years, I'm imagining that she's a freaking nightmare. HIGH maintenance. Got him in over his head, or they're splitting up already. Amanda said she noticed that there were no men's clothes at the house. And I got the sense that her agent isn't a fan.

So, I told Chris to tell her agent that we'll go up to 390, and that we'd like an answer before the open house. I don't want to get into a bidding war, and we're NOT going over asking price. Well... I'll go 400 even. but I'm paying that last dollar in pennies.

We probably won't get it. shame..... but, hey...there will be other places.

Gravdigr · 05-17-2019, 03:07 PM

If ya get beat out, find out where she moved to, and build her next door neighbor the most awesome electric guitar...

lumberjim · 05-17-2019, 03:35 PM

Lol. If I get beat it'll be because someone wanted it more than me. We have no strings attached to our offer, and no fha or va bullshit to contend with, so our dollars may be more appealing than other offers. I let my agent know that we'd go to 400 if it means she signs the contract before the open house, but if she goes through with it, we're at 390 and we'll go from there.

Tense

xoxoxoBruce · 05-17-2019, 11:50 PM

But you don't know if the other offer, if it's real, is higher, lower, or the same as your first offer.

lumberjim · 05-18-2019, 12:37 AM

Precisely.

That's the problem. Why can't I just call the fucking lady and get down to brass tacs.

xoxoxoBruce · 05-18-2019, 12:55 AM

Or break in wearing a mask and warn her to get out of town pronto.

sexobon · 05-18-2019, 10:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lumberjim

Precisely.

That's the problem. Why can't I just call the fucking lady and get down to brass tacs.

Because the agent wants to maximize the commission.

05-16-2019, 09:56 PM	#1501
Clodfobble UNDER CONDITIONAL MITIGATION Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Austin, TX Posts: 20,012	Gooooo Jim and Amanda! __________________ My book My other book My spirit animal

05-16-2019, 11:17 PM	#1503
xoxoxoBruce The future is unwritten Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 71,105	Can you do that, I thought it was mandatory in Jersey, some kind of law. Doesn't look like there's any railings anyway. Doesn't look like you can reach the pool from the lower roof, even with a running start, either. __________________ The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump.

05-17-2019, 12:19 AM	#1504
lumberjim I can hear my ears Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 25,571	No, but you certainly could hit it off the wood shop roof. We're already discussing the deck I'll build, and improvements to the pool area. And, if they have that open house, we're going to send people over there to talk bad about it. __________________ This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality Embrace this moment, remember We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan

05-17-2019, 12:31 AM	#1505
xoxoxoBruce The future is unwritten Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 71,105	We have an experienced deck builder to call on, but he'd probably screw up the plumbing. An awful tough place to badmouth, what could you say that would sound even remotely feasible? __________________ The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump.

05-17-2019, 08:02 AM	#1506
Clodfobble UNDER CONDITIONAL MITIGATION Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Austin, TX Posts: 20,012	You could say they're selling because someone was murdered there? __________________ My book My other book My spirit animal

05-17-2019, 10:40 AM	#1508
Gravdigr The Un-Tuckian Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: South Central...KY that is Posts: 39,517	__________________ These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off.

05-17-2019, 01:17 PM	#1509
lumberjim I can hear my ears Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 25,571	I spoke to Chris (our agent) today, and he's spoken to theirs. They got another offer last night. fuckshitdamnpisshell. Their agent tells mine that the homeowner wants to have that open house before countering any offers. He said both offers are good, and the selling agent wants her to forget the open house, and focus on the 2 offers. But it's the sellers's call. I looked her up on facebook, figuring she was in the local facebook group Merchantville Matters, and she is. Looks like a princess, and the husband looks like a frog. Only there 1.5 years, I'm imagining that she's a freaking nightmare. HIGH maintenance. Got him in over his head, or they're splitting up already. Amanda said she noticed that there were no men's clothes at the house. And I got the sense that her agent isn't a fan. So, I told Chris to tell her agent that we'll go up to 390, and that we'd like an answer before the open house. I don't want to get into a bidding war, and we're NOT going over asking price. Well... I'll go 400 even. but I'm paying that last dollar in pennies. We probably won't get it. shame..... but, hey...there will be other places. __________________ This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality Embrace this moment, remember We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan

05-17-2019, 03:07 PM	#1510
Gravdigr The Un-Tuckian Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: South Central...KY that is Posts: 39,517	If ya get beat out, find out where she moved to, and build her next door neighbor the most awesome electric guitar... __________________ These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off.

05-17-2019, 03:35 PM	#1511
lumberjim I can hear my ears Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 25,571	Lol. If I get beat it'll be because someone wanted it more than me. We have no strings attached to our offer, and no fha or va bullshit to contend with, so our dollars may be more appealing than other offers. I let my agent know that we'd go to 400 if it means she signs the contract before the open house, but if she goes through with it, we're at 390 and we'll go from there. Tense __________________ This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality Embrace this moment, remember We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan

05-17-2019, 11:50 PM	#1512
xoxoxoBruce The future is unwritten Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 71,105	But you don't know if the other offer, if it's real, is higher, lower, or the same as your first offer. __________________ The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump.

05-18-2019, 12:37 AM	#1513
lumberjim I can hear my ears Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 25,571	Precisely. That's the problem. Why can't I just call the fucking lady and get down to brass tacs. __________________ This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality Embrace this moment, remember We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan

05-18-2019, 12:55 AM	#1514
xoxoxoBruce The future is unwritten Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 71,105	Or break in wearing a mask and warn her to get out of town pronto. __________________ The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump.

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