What might be making you a tad apprehensive, but might not, as it's too soon to tell - Page 13

glatt · 01-29-2013, 09:07 AM

So this cow orker just came into my office to tell me she thought she was coming down with the flu and needed to go home because she felt terrible. She wanted to get my reassurances that everything was going to be alright and that we would be able to cover for her if she went home. She sat in a chair 5 feet from me for about 5 minutes to get these two thoughts out. And she broke down in tears about half a dozen times. She's always been a talker (in a bad way) and has used me as her therapist. It's all fine and good, but get your damn contagious ass out of my office. I said three times that we didn't want her staying at work and getting other people sick and that she should go home now and she didn't get the damn hint to get out of my office. I never said the words "get out" but I was screaming them in my head the entire time.

So she didn't cough or sneeze, and the door remained open. My office is small, about 8 by 10. How likely am I to get sick now?

footfootfoot · 01-29-2013, 12:12 PM

I bet not. As long as she didn't sneeze or cough.

footfootfoot · 01-29-2013, 12:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by infinite monkey

I don't view mental health issues as not having my 'big girl panties' (an abhorrent phrase anyway) but I'm going with the benefit of the doubt and assuming that you were trying to be funny.

Big O' Wig says we will meet next week to discuss the issues I've brought up in the past, and see what we can do to make things better.

Thanks everyone.

Maybe my Arrested Development, Interrupted, was not only what I needed (to stay alive) but was also an eye-opener here?

I'm confused. So you were going commando at work? And that's why you had to leave? How did they know you weren't wearing underwear? Shouldn't the dress code only cover what is visible? You could have been wearing spanx, for all they knew.

I missed a key plot point.

Nirvana · 01-29-2013, 01:32 PM

She was wearing a thong

classicman · 01-30-2013, 10:56 PM

Imma lil late, as usual, but still glad you are doing well/better/whateverthePCfuckingtermistowishyouwell and be happy for you.

{{HUGGZZ}}

infinite monkey · 01-31-2013, 08:35 AM

Thanks buddy.

The torture isn't over yet. The Swooper is still effing with me big time. The difference now is I just keep doing my work, smile, say yes or no in the right places, and I don't let her get to me. Whatever happens will happen but I hope it happens soon.

I am in a good place though. My breakdown seems to be just what the doctor didn't order, but it sure helped me with perspective.

I remember to breathe, I remember to walk if I feel anxiety mounting, I remember to write it down if need be, and I remember it ain't nothin' but a job, and it ain't worth my life or even my little bit of pride.

But they make the move. I won't.

BigV · 01-31-2013, 10:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by infinite monkey

Thanks buddy.

The torture isn't over yet. The Swooper is still effing with me big time. The difference now is I just keep doing my work, smile, say yes or no in the right places, and I don't let her get to me. Whatever happens will happen but I hope it happens soon.

I am in a good place though. My breakdown seems to be just what the doctor didn't order, but it sure helped me with perspective.

I remember to breathe, I remember to walk if I feel anxiety mounting, I remember to write it down if need be, and I remember it ain't nothin' but a job, and it ain't worth my life or even my little bit of pride.

But they make the move. I won't.

this sounds smart, you sound good here. I'd like to add something. about who makes the move--let them make the move if you want, you make the move if and when you want, whichever. But. I would urge you to PREPARE to make the move or have the move made by them. Being caught flat footed is an avoidable problem, and it's got the potential to be a big problem. Avoid it by being prepared, or at least minimize it. You're smart, you're on your feet now, you'll be on your feet no matter what happens.

infinite monkey · 01-31-2013, 10:43 AM

Thanks V.

I have been preparing, in one form or another, for a very long time. Stacks of documentation from months and months, for starters.

I am prepared, emotionally, for them to make a move. I will not do it unless I have found something else: I need to think about a few monetary issues that are tightly tied up with 'who does what and when they does it.'

I also have to be very careful not to pile a giant plate of readiness that I have to lug about on my back because those giant piles are what send me over the edge. So I deal with the actual actions as they come, and I have numerous ideas, plans, and avenues of recourse should I need them.

I feel, like, 100 times more prepared to handle whatever than I did two weeks ago, that's for sure.

But it ain't always easy. :1footinfrontoftheothersmilie:

BigV · 01-31-2013, 11:21 AM

yw.

you really do sound great. that makes me happy.

footfootfoot · 01-31-2013, 11:42 AM

Shit yeah, I'll have whatever Infi's having.

infinite monkey · 01-31-2013, 02:12 PM

I don't know. Scratch that. Reverse it.

I just got another big fuck-over about my paid time off. Time I've earned. I have crafted a letter to HR and will send towards the end of the day. I walked outside because I knew there was going to be no way to absorb this latest jab and not get a little weepy (and that I have a horrible head cold which makes me weak and weepy anyway.)

The gist of my letter is about overtime I never received compensation or 'comp time' for (while everyone else in the office made money hand over fist...consider making 55g/year and getting your hourly wage of that time and a halfed...one cow orker felt it was 'sinful' but it set her up nice when she finally got forced out, and I am a pay grade lower and still PROFESSIONAL staff just like them) and about being harrassed because of my illness (which the job as it is exacerbates) and the complete disregard for my FMLA that I did to save my ass. And who the fuck does it matter to if I use earned vacation time (I have 220 hours) except to ME! It only hurts ME! And I can't ever use it because there's always too much to do then I make myself sick with worry and anxiety and end up using sick time...never ending circle. And to top it off, I reported 15 minutes late one morning (it was actually about 8 minutes after 8) when the traffic was bad and was told I can't use my PERSONAL time to cover that and I need to take it without pay.

My letter is a bit more professional than that, but it is by no means unclear in its purpose.

It's as bad as it can get. I may turn in my resignation tomorrow. I will have to give 30 days to get my vac pay paid out, and I will have to fight for unemployment (prove they made it impossible to stay) and I will lose my insurance...

Why don't they just get it over with? I'm broken, I'm trying to mend, and they keep kicking me.

I wish I wish I wish I could tell them to shove the job, but I have nothing/no one to fall back on. But I'm regressing, inside. I'm scared and hurt again and my coping mechanisms are falling far short of helping.

Pete Zicato · 01-31-2013, 02:34 PM

illegitimi non carborundum

footfootfoot · 01-31-2013, 02:36 PM

From personal experience I can tell you that when you are living or working with crazy people who insist that they are normal, it makes you begin to believe that you are crazy.

Keep reminding your self that it's them who are crazy, not you.

infinite monkey · 01-31-2013, 02:42 PM

I just feel completely without hope, here.

I need to sleep on it. See how it feels tomorrow. Can I PM a copy of my letter to HR to a couple of you so you can tell me what you think?

Wow. Just. Wow.

glatt · 01-31-2013, 02:46 PM

Sure. PM it to me and I'll take a look at it.

I'm no employment law expert, but I'll give you any thoughts that I have.

Just remember that if HR is the enemy, you may be giving them ammunition with any letter you might send them, so be careful.

01-29-2013, 12:12 PM	#182
footfootfoot To shreds, you say? Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: in the house and on the street-how many, many feet we meet! Posts: 18,449	I bet not. As long as she didn't sneeze or cough. __________________ The internet is a hateful stew of vomit you can never take completely seriously. - Her Fobs

01-29-2013, 01:32 PM	#184
Nirvana Back in 10 Join Date: Aug 2008 Posts: 3,684	She was wearing a thong __________________ Speaking simply... do not confuse this with having a simple mind.

01-30-2013, 10:56 PM	#185
classicman barely disguised asshole, keeper of all that is holy. Join Date: Nov 2007 Posts: 23,401	Imma lil late, as usual, but still glad you are doing well/better/whateverthePCfuckingtermistowishyouwell and be happy for you. {{HUGGZZ}} __________________ "like strapping a pillow on a bull in a china shop" Bullitt

01-31-2013, 11:21 AM	#189
BigV Goon Squad Leader Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Seattle Posts: 27,063	yw. you really do sound great. that makes me happy. __________________ Be Just and Fear Not.

01-31-2013, 11:42 AM	#190
footfootfoot To shreds, you say? Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: in the house and on the street-how many, many feet we meet! Posts: 18,449	Shit yeah, I'll have whatever Infi's having. __________________ The internet is a hateful stew of vomit you can never take completely seriously. - Her Fobs

01-29-2013, 09:07 AM	#181
glatt ™ Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Arlington, VA Posts: 27,717	So this cow orker just came into my office to tell me she thought she was coming down with the flu and needed to go home because she felt terrible. She wanted to get my reassurances that everything was going to be alright and that we would be able to cover for her if she went home. She sat in a chair 5 feet from me for about 5 minutes to get these two thoughts out. And she broke down in tears about half a dozen times. She's always been a talker (in a bad way) and has used me as her therapist. It's all fine and good, but get your damn contagious ass out of my office. I said three times that we didn't want her staying at work and getting other people sick and that she should go home now and she didn't get the damn hint to get out of my office. I never said the words "get out" but I was screaming them in my head the entire time. So she didn't cough or sneeze, and the door remained open. My office is small, about 8 by 10. How likely am I to get sick now?

01-31-2013, 08:35 AM	#186
infinite monkey Person who doesn't update the user title Join Date: Mar 2011 Posts: 13,002	Thanks buddy. The torture isn't over yet. The Swooper is still effing with me big time. The difference now is I just keep doing my work, smile, say yes or no in the right places, and I don't let her get to me. Whatever happens will happen but I hope it happens soon. I am in a good place though. My breakdown seems to be just what the doctor didn't order, but it sure helped me with perspective. I remember to breathe, I remember to walk if I feel anxiety mounting, I remember to write it down if need be, and I remember it ain't nothin' but a job, and it ain't worth my life or even my little bit of pride. But they make the move. I won't.

01-31-2013, 10:43 AM	#188
infinite monkey Person who doesn't update the user title Join Date: Mar 2011 Posts: 13,002	Thanks V. I have been preparing, in one form or another, for a very long time. Stacks of documentation from months and months, for starters. I am prepared, emotionally, for them to make a move. I will not do it unless I have found something else: I need to think about a few monetary issues that are tightly tied up with 'who does what and when they does it.' I also have to be very careful not to pile a giant plate of readiness that I have to lug about on my back because those giant piles are what send me over the edge. So I deal with the actual actions as they come, and I have numerous ideas, plans, and avenues of recourse should I need them. I feel, like, 100 times more prepared to handle whatever than I did two weeks ago, that's for sure. But it ain't always easy. :1footinfrontoftheothersmilie:

01-31-2013, 02:12 PM	#191
infinite monkey Person who doesn't update the user title Join Date: Mar 2011 Posts: 13,002	I don't know. Scratch that. Reverse it. I just got another big fuck-over about my paid time off. Time I've earned. I have crafted a letter to HR and will send towards the end of the day. I walked outside because I knew there was going to be no way to absorb this latest jab and not get a little weepy (and that I have a horrible head cold which makes me weak and weepy anyway.) The gist of my letter is about overtime I never received compensation or 'comp time' for (while everyone else in the office made money hand over fist...consider making 55g/year and getting your hourly wage of that time and a halfed...one cow orker felt it was 'sinful' but it set her up nice when she finally got forced out, and I am a pay grade lower and still PROFESSIONAL staff just like them) and about being harrassed because of my illness (which the job as it is exacerbates) and the complete disregard for my FMLA that I did to save my ass. And who the fuck does it matter to if I use earned vacation time (I have 220 hours) except to ME! It only hurts ME! And I can't ever use it because there's always too much to do then I make myself sick with worry and anxiety and end up using sick time...never ending circle. And to top it off, I reported 15 minutes late one morning (it was actually about 8 minutes after 8) when the traffic was bad and was told I can't use my PERSONAL time to cover that and I need to take it without pay. My letter is a bit more professional than that, but it is by no means unclear in its purpose. It's as bad as it can get. I may turn in my resignation tomorrow. I will have to give 30 days to get my vac pay paid out, and I will have to fight for unemployment (prove they made it impossible to stay) and I will lose my insurance... Why don't they just get it over with? I'm broken, I'm trying to mend, and they keep kicking me. I wish I wish I wish I could tell them to shove the job, but I have nothing/no one to fall back on. But I'm regressing, inside. I'm scared and hurt again and my coping mechanisms are falling far short of helping.

01-31-2013, 02:34 PM	#192
Pete Zicato Turns out my CRS is a symptom of TMB. Join Date: Jan 2010 Location: Chicago suburbs Posts: 2,916	illegitimi non carborundum __________________ Talk nerdy to me.

01-31-2013, 02:36 PM	#193
footfootfoot To shreds, you say? Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: in the house and on the street-how many, many feet we meet! Posts: 18,449	From personal experience I can tell you that when you are living or working with crazy people who insist that they are normal, it makes you begin to believe that you are crazy. Keep reminding your self that it's them who are crazy, not you. __________________ The internet is a hateful stew of vomit you can never take completely seriously. - Her Fobs

01-31-2013, 02:42 PM	#194
infinite monkey Person who doesn't update the user title Join Date: Mar 2011 Posts: 13,002	I just feel completely without hope, here. I need to sleep on it. See how it feels tomorrow. Can I PM a copy of my letter to HR to a couple of you so you can tell me what you think? Wow. Just. Wow.

01-31-2013, 02:46 PM	#195
glatt ™ Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Arlington, VA Posts: 27,717	Sure. PM it to me and I'll take a look at it. I'm no employment law expert, but I'll give you any thoughts that I have. Just remember that if HR is the enemy, you may be giving them ammunition with any letter you might send them, so be careful.

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