Wierd sayings - Page 13

Crimson Ghost · 11-26-2005, 04:11 AM

This one is best when yelled in a crowded area, such as a mall, a store, or church:

"HEY BABY, EVER HAVE YOUR ASSHOLE LICKED BY A FATMAN IN AN OVERCOAT?!?"

The reactions are to die for.

(Kudos to Kevin Smith.)

Sundae · 11-28-2005, 09:04 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Crimson Ghost

This one is best when yelled in a crowded area, such as a mall, a store, or church:

"HEY BABY, EVER HAVE YOUR ASSHOLE LICKED BY A FATMAN IN AN OVERCOAT?!?"

That did make me laugh, though it brought back disturbing memories. Walking through the town centre on a busy shopping Saturday when I was 15, a respectable looking man (not fat, no overcoat) approached me and leaned in to say confidentially in my ear, "I'd love to taste your arsehole." Then walked away as if he'd just bid me good-day.

My friends - sadly - didn't believe me, although they admitted I went white then bright red. I do wonder if he had a thing about skinny girls in baggy jumpers & ankle length skirts, or whether it was just a power trip because I was such an unlikely candidate.

wolf · 11-26-2005, 10:24 AM

My personal favorite is to stand near the line of kids and parents waiting to get their picture taken with the Easter Bunny ... "Wow, look at the load of Christian kids waiting to sit on the lap of the Pagan Fertility Symbol!"

Iggy · 11-26-2005, 12:36 PM

Crazier than a rat in a tin shithouse

Grinning like a mad frog in a bucket/ Mad as a frog in a bucket

I don't like the cut of your jibb!

Cyclefrance · 11-28-2005, 05:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Iggy

...I don't like the cut of your jibb!

That should take the wind out of his sails

wolf · 11-26-2005, 01:20 PM

This is specific to my place of business: The rat turd does not fall far from the kumquat.

capnhowdy · 11-28-2005, 07:54 AM

when suffering from a hangover:

"I feel like someone beat my ass with a sack of catfish"

BigV · 11-28-2005, 11:22 AM

Busier than a two tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs

Busier than a one legged man in an ass kicking contest

Busier than a one armed paper hanger

Sundae · 11-28-2005, 12:42 PM

Nervous as a long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs

(though I've never heard that one, just read it - does it count?)

mrnoodle · 11-28-2005, 01:28 PM

Nervous as a pregnant nun

capnhowdy · 11-28-2005, 02:25 PM

scared as a 10 year old on report card day

capnhowdy · 11-28-2005, 02:28 PM

too broke to pay attention

like a cat on a hot tin roof

up the creek without a paddle

weak as water

BigV · 11-28-2005, 02:36 PM

Fine as paint

capnhowdy · 11-28-2005, 10:24 PM

fine as frog hair

Undertoad · 11-28-2005, 10:28 PM

fine as a red cunt hair

11-26-2005, 04:11 AM	#1
Crimson Ghost Larger than life and twice as ugly. Join Date: Apr 2004 Posts: 5,264	This one is best when yelled in a crowded area, such as a mall, a store, or church: "HEY BABY, EVER HAVE YOUR ASSHOLE LICKED BY A FATMAN IN AN OVERCOAT?!?" The reactions are to die for. (Kudos to Kevin Smith.) __________________ We must all go through a rite of passage. It must be physical, it must be painful, and it must leave a mark. I have no knowledge of the events which you are describing, and if I did have knowledge of them, I would be unable to discuss them with you now or at any future period. Don't waste your time always searching for those wasted years

11-26-2005, 10:24 AM	#3
wolf lobber of scimitars Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Phila Burbs Posts: 20,774	My personal favorite is to stand near the line of kids and parents waiting to get their picture taken with the Easter Bunny ... "Wow, look at the load of Christian kids waiting to sit on the lap of the Pagan Fertility Symbol!" __________________ wolf eht htiw og "Conspiracies are the norm, not the exception." --G. Edward Griffin The Creature from Jekyll Island High Priestess of the Church of the Whale Penis

11-26-2005, 12:36 PM	#4
Iggy Back and ready to tart up the place Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Kansas Posts: 850	Crazier than a rat in a tin shithouse Grinning like a mad frog in a bucket/ Mad as a frog in a bucket I don't like the cut of your jibb! __________________ Chock-full of naughty goodness.

11-26-2005, 01:20 PM	#6
wolf lobber of scimitars Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Phila Burbs Posts: 20,774	This is specific to my place of business: The rat turd does not fall far from the kumquat. __________________ wolf eht htiw og "Conspiracies are the norm, not the exception." --G. Edward Griffin The Creature from Jekyll Island High Priestess of the Church of the Whale Penis

11-28-2005, 07:54 AM	#7
capnhowdy Blatantly Homosapien Join Date: Mar 2004 Posts: 6,200	when suffering from a hangover: "I feel like someone beat my ass with a sack of catfish" __________________ Please type slowly. I can't read very fast............... and no holy water, please.

11-28-2005, 11:22 AM	#8
BigV Goon Squad Leader Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Seattle Posts: 27,063	Busier than a two tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs Busier than a one legged man in an ass kicking contest Busier than a one armed paper hanger __________________ Be Just and Fear Not.

11-28-2005, 12:42 PM	#9
Sundae polaroid of perfection Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: West Yorkshire Posts: 24,185	Nervous as a long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs (though I've never heard that one, just read it - does it count?)

11-28-2005, 01:28 PM	#10
mrnoodle bent Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: under the weather Posts: 2,656	Nervous as a pregnant nun __________________ Sìn a nall na cuaranan sin. -- Cha mhór is fheairrde thu iad, tha iad coltach ri cat air a dhathadh

11-28-2005, 02:25 PM	#11
capnhowdy Blatantly Homosapien Join Date: Mar 2004 Posts: 6,200	scared as a 10 year old on report card day __________________ Please type slowly. I can't read very fast............... and no holy water, please.

11-28-2005, 02:28 PM	#12
capnhowdy Blatantly Homosapien Join Date: Mar 2004 Posts: 6,200	too broke to pay attention like a cat on a hot tin roof up the creek without a paddle weak as water __________________ Please type slowly. I can't read very fast............... and no holy water, please.

11-28-2005, 02:36 PM	#13
BigV Goon Squad Leader Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Seattle Posts: 27,063	Fine as paint __________________ Be Just and Fear Not.

11-28-2005, 10:24 PM	#14
capnhowdy Blatantly Homosapien Join Date: Mar 2004 Posts: 6,200	fine as frog hair __________________ Please type slowly. I can't read very fast............... and no holy water, please.

11-28-2005, 10:28 PM	#15
Undertoad Radical Centrist Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Cottage of Prussia Posts: 31,423	fine as a red cunt hair

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