What's upsetting you today?

[Shawnee123]

Received bad news on an old friend who has been fighting esophageal cancer. He will probably not be in this world much longer. He's a father, a husband, a drummer, and a generally all around good soul.

Eh, I can't make sense of this world, I guess.

[Trilby]

Shawnee.

[morethanpretty]

That's because this world makes no sense Shawnee. My heart goes out to you, him, family and friends.

[Elspode]

I'm sorry to hear about your friend, Shawnee. Somewhere, Osama bin Laden is still alive, and your friend is dying.

Proof that the world is neither logical nor kind. Be strong.

[Cicero]

I'm sorry Shawnee. You know I have ears if you ever wanna talk about it. ::hugs::

His family needs you, and it's good to give them support right now if they need it. Even if it's just monetary.

Keep the chin up girl, and try not to dwell on it too much. There are things that will never make sense, and you can just try your best to move through them as gracefully as possible.

And if you keep making that sour face I will be forced to tickle the Shaw! Just kidding...PM me if you need anything.

[glatt]

That sucks, Shawnee. sorry.

[Shawnee123]

Thanks guys.

He is a guy who has been in a couple bands with my ex...notably a band that was pretty popular around here for years. He married a woman I happened to know from my childhood, then later as a young adult...then we reconnected. His oldest daughter graduated last year from the place I used to work, his youngest just got married. I'm glad he was there for those milestones...though he couldn't actually be there for the graduation because he was going through some pretty intense treatment. He's just an all around good guy, and no one gets this turn of events. He didn't smoke, but this is the same kind of cancer that took his father a few years ago.

I'll always think of him drumming and singing "Here comes Johnny singin' oldies, goldies
Be-bop-a-lula, baby what I say..."

[DanaC]

Ach Shawnee, I'm sorry to hear about your friend. The unfairness of it all must be upsetting.

[Treasenuak]

I'm sorry to hear about your friend, Shawnee... -sends comforting hugs-

I am currently on crutches, a knee immobilizer, and oxycodone. Somehow, during dance practice on Sunday, I blew out my right knee. Not sure what I did... it started aching a little bit so I went and sat down to rest... next thing I know, I couldn't move it and was screaming in pain. So I've gotta make an appointment with an orthopedist at some point soon... and chances are because of the downtime I need to heal up, I'll be losing my (WONDERFUL) new job that I absolutely love. -sighs- Some days, I really dislike being me.

[Shawnee123]

Oh crap, Trea! PAINFUL.

My senior year of HS basketball, I came down from a rebound and felt my knee give. The quack I went to swore it was leeegamints, and there wasn't much they could do. At a dance my freshman year of college, I boogied a litttle too far to the side, apparently, and my knee totally locked up. Went home and got a knee immobilizer and crutches and spent half my first quarter of college hoofin' it to class via crutches. There was NO putting weight on that leg, or bending it. It was fun when my crutches hit a wet leaf and I went sprawling. Turns out my meniscus had been torn, and when dancing had basically curled up. They took it out over thanksgiving break...except for a few reminders here and there it's done pretty well.

Hope it feels better. One thing...they gave me NO painkillers back then. The bastards. Had to rely on beer!

[Treasenuak]

-laughs- I suggested beer to Ted... he about deafened me hollering about the horrors of mixing oxycodone and alcohol. Thing was, I was only teasing him a bit... I'd never be THAT!! incredibly stupid. He took two days off of work to spoil me and watch the kidlet for me... he's such a sweetheart! Today he went back to work and I'm hobbling around on crutches trying to figure out how to use the crutches and carry the baby at the same time. Not working so well.

[DanaC]

Remind me again, what it is you do for a living Trease? Is there no way you could continue your job on crutches?

[Treasenuak]

I take care of the pets for sale at PetSmart... involves lots of lifting, carrying, shoving, pulling, pushing, kneeling, etc., so no... I wouldn't really be able to do it on crutches. Or with an immobilizer, although I could get away with it if I didn't have to have the crutches.

[lookout123]

Anxiety attacks. loads of fun. Not major emergency room visit style, but heavy weight on the chest, nausea, heart racing, completely overwhelmed style. yeah loving it. I know in a few hours it'll be over and I'll still be alive and kicking but it sucks.

Most of my clients listened to me and made what I felt were appropriate portfolio changes last fall/winter. Some didn't. I made them sign statements pointing out they were ignoring my best advice so I won't get sued or anything but I still get to face these people and explain in stomach churning detail why they have half the money today that they did last year.

To make matters worse, the people I have to see in an hour and a half were warned they were withdrawing too much too soon even before the market downturn. They have about a 15% chance of not outliving their money now. Will it matter that I warned them and asked for action a long time ago? No. Not at all. I'm still the piece of shit that lost their money. I'm the evil guy who they'll blame when they can't afford to do something they want for the next 30 fucking years.

It won't matter that I sat them down and explained in painful detail what needed to change, how to cut expenses, how to minimize risk, and even showed them that the changes I was begging for would result in lowered income for me... I will still be the devil incarnate when they talk to friends and family. When they consider going back to work. When they talk to the other families on the block who have been doing business with me for years.

Pardon me while I go puke again.

[DanaC]

*shakes head* that sucks right royally, Lookout.

I know it's frustrating, but you know you did right by them. Try not to think too much about what they're saying to other people. This is the nature of the business you are in; if your advice is taken and money is made, your clients will pat themselves on the back for their financial acumen (i.e they chose a good advisor :P) on the other hand if your advice is not taken or money is not made, you are a handy scapegoat for their own sense of panic and inadequacy.

It sucks, but it is the way that it is, and probably has always been so. It is an unfortunate fact of business that happy customers tell far fewer people about their joy than unhappy customers tell of their dismay. But that doesn't mean they don't tell anyone. You no doubt have clients who've done pretty well by you. They may not tell as many people as the dickheads who ignored your advice (for which they were paying, which is totally bizarre. Why buy advice that you are just going to ignore?) but the next time a friend is considering their investments, they may well drop them your details.

If the dickheads are teling people who've been doing business with you for years then the likelihood is that the experience they relate to those people will be entirely at odds with those people's own experience of doing business with you. They may wonder a little, they may even feel their friend has been hard done by...but most people need a fairly compelling reason to change service providers in any area of life.

This post probably wasn't much help to you...in essence you could boil it down to one sentence: don't let the bastards grind you down *smiles*