Ouch!

[xoxoxoBruce]

Is there a deep seated reason you're inflicting this suffering on yourself?

[lookout123]

yeah. i've seriously hated my teeth for a very long time. they weren't hideous, in fact they're in perfect health - i've only had 2 cavities in my life. for 12/13 years i've had crooked teeth and it has always been a source of embarrassment for me. nobody ever pointed and laughed or anything tramatic like that - it's just one of those things.

there has always been a reason not to do it in the past, and now there isn't. i was extremely tempted to write the great big check and have the front teeth taken out and replaced with Bicon implants, but my dentist and ortho convinced me to go the more traditional route.

this isn't some self torture brought on by my divorce - it is for me. as vain as it is, i want to smile or laugh with my mouth open and not feel uneasy.

[xoxoxoBruce]

Could have gone with a droopy mustache.

[lookout123]

i thougth about just wearing a bandana - but then i realized banking could become problematic.

[Tonchi]

After wearing braces for most of Jr. High, I could at least close my mouth again without an overbite like a horse. Unfortunately, this was short lived. My wisdom teeth started breaking out when I was about 20, and this resulted in most of the orthodontia being shoved all out of alignment. So in my mid-20's I had braces again for several years, but not until I got surgery to remove the wisdom teeth plus the back molars all around (not at the same time) so there would be room in my mouth for putting everything back in place. 30 years later, I woke up one morning and discovered that my entire jaw was out of alignment, causing the upper and lower teeth to not meet properly anymore, and since that time much of the straightness of my teeth has become a thing of the past again. But no way I am getting braces again now, I have had enough of them.

So yes, I wore braces as a working and dating adult and I can tell you these hints:

WaterPiks are good, you really can't live without one. You will not be able to brush your teeth the same way now and you can't floss. Never go to meet anybody after eating until you have checked your mouth in the mirror, you will be horrified at what will end up hanging there at the most embarrassing time. If I could designate the worst thing about having braces it would be that eating in general is not all that fun anymore. You will probably lose weight.

Do not schedule a date or important event the day your orthodontist does an adjustment. The pain will not go away for days, it is impossible to chew, talk, or have much of a good attitude until your teeth "settle down" again. Do not go anywhere cold at those times either, you do not want to know the pain of inhaling freezing air.

Keep lip gloss or Blistex hidden somewhere. You will tend to breathe through your mouth for a while and your lips will get dry and split.

Having braces will not affect your social life in any way. In fact, adult males getting braces is a status symbol. It is a great conversation starter. But be cautious of having any photos taken of you, especially with a flash. Braces never look good in a photo. I had the misfortune of being the bridesmaid in my sister's wedding during the time I had braces, and none of the photos look good.

Unless your partner has a tendency to put her tongue absolutely everywhere, the braces will have no effect on your enjoyment of kissing. People told me that they could not tell any difference. However, there is one thing you must definitely forget about for now and that is oral sex. Braces do not cut the people you kiss, but they definitely will snag in hairs. You really do not want to find that out the hard way. And it is a definite turn-off if you smile at somebody when you have little kinky hairs stuck in your braces

[lookout123]

fortunately it is fashionable for people in my desired age range to be hairless or damn near - so oral is still in. Woohoo!

i was telling a female friend about my concern for how braces will affect kissing. she promptly leaned over and gave me the best kiss i've had in a very long time. she declared that there is no negative effect on kissing.

me being me, i said thanks then told her i was really worried how the braces would affect my oral skills. she said she was a good friend, but i'd have to figure that one out on my own.

[BigV]

PLEASE clarify your postion wrt hairlessness and desired age and oral.

[Clodfobble]

Originally Posted by lookout123

...she said she was a good friend, but i'd have to figure that one out on my own.

IMHO, she's lying. She wants you to figure it out on her, she just wants to give it a little more time.

[lookout123]

eh, she really is just friend material though. she's hot and nice and all... but i've had enough "psycho-as-mate" for awhile i think.

BigV - dude - no seriously dude. i'm 32. i'm only talking about bush - not scalp. my normal dating age range would probably be somewhere around 24-38. so, the hairlessness would be from shaving, waxing, or lazer most likely.

[BigV]

l123 -- dude. I totally knew that. I'm just flippin you sh*t. I was actually implying that the age related hairlessness was scary because of the other end of the age range. Now that's scary.

[lookout123]

i guess i'm grateful that my mind totally didn't go that direction so i missed your joke then. carry on.

[footfootfoot]

The whole age appropriate smooth cecita thing is really bumming my stone. It is my personal grail, I suppose.

[lookout123]

age appropriate?

it isn't just for 22 year old strippers anymore.

i'm telling you - laser hair removal is a miracle. now to get your SO to succomb... it is all in the marketing. "look honey, for only $700 you won't have to put a sharp blade anywhere near your squishy spots for 8-10 years! no pain! no maintenance. gosh, think of all the time you'd save."

[footfootfoot]

Originally Posted by lookout123

age appropriate?

it isn't just for 22 year old strippers anymore.

i'm telling you - laser hair removal is a miracle. now to get your SO to succomb... it is all in the marketing. "look honey, for only $700 you won't have to put a sharp blade anywhere near your squishy spots for 8-10 years! no pain! no maintenance. gosh, think of all the time you'd save."

Well, when I said "age appropriate" I was referring to BigV's earlier post, meaning that naturally smooth, single digit women are not my bag baby, hence, "age appropriate smoothness" would be anyone old enough to buy beer.

As for your other, excellent point, lasers, I still have to figure out how to first convince her to put a sharp blade near her squishy spots, in order to sell her the less dangerous alternative.

Probably not unlike a missionary who first needs to convince to the natives that they are miserable sinners destined for hell in order sell them on his miracle cure.

[xoxoxoBruce]

I still have to figure out how to first convince her to put a sharp blade near her squishy spots, in order to sell her the less dangerous alternative.

You could ask her to clip, or clip & shave, you. Then just insist on returning the favor.

Or, a gift certificate for a day at the Spa that includes champagne (a lot of it) and a full waxing.

If that doesn't work, next time she's amorous, sequester some bubble gum in your cheek. You won't get laid but in removing the gum you'll lead her to the edge of the slippery slope.