My strange mother in law - Page 2

DanaC · 08-26-2008, 07:40 AM

Forgive me if this is out of turn Ali, but I think you were over harsh in your initial reaction. A flippant comment is not the worst sin in the world and hardly unusual/out of place in a Cellar thread, even a pretty serious one. It was a witty aside that made a comment about racism in schools. Not an attack on you or an attempt to reduce the situation itself.

For myself I had an interesting situation when me and J were together. His dad is adorable. I love his dad. A thoroughly nice, gentle, clever, funny and affectionate guy. His step-mum is also lovely. She can be a tad prickly from time to time when stressed and is.....in her own way mad as a hatter (to look at, think someone from 1920s Berlin crossed with a little 60s Carnaby class) but very sweet and generous and never shirked from the difficulties of bringing up a deeply troubled 11 year old step-son. I got on well (and still do on the occasional visit) with them. His actual mother, however, was another matter.

How many people here have had the fun experience of going to work for their partner's estranged (but recently back in contact) mother, only to have her burn down her own business and try to fit them up for it? How many people here have been arrested at 6am on a Sunday morning, stuck in a cell without any shoelaces or belt, held for several hours of heavy questioning until they start to believe maybe they did drop a lit cig into a basket? How many people here have sat in such a cell, wondering if they might actually go down for a ten year stretch for an arson they were fairly sure was nothing to do with them? Now, that, my friends is a mad MIL (only an honorary MIL, as me and J never made it official).

Fortunately, it turned out she had form on the whole arson thing, so that was that. I was 20 at the time. Scared the shit out of me.

xoxoxoBruce · 08-26-2008, 07:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by classicman

Don't have one right now THANK GOD! The first one was a psycho. The "hopefully" next one seems wonderful - - - so far.

Next one!?!? What, did you go to public school?

classicman · 08-26-2008, 08:59 AM

lol - yes I did xoB. I surtinly dun did.

Aliantha · 08-26-2008, 06:34 PM

Quote:

Forgive me if this is out of turn Ali, but I think you were over harsh in your initial reaction. A flippant comment is not the worst sin in the world and hardly unusual/out of place in a Cellar thread, even a pretty serious one. It was a witty aside that made a comment about racism in schools. Not an attack on you or an attempt to reduce the situation itself.

Check the other threads he posted in at around the same time yesterday Dana. This wasn't the only thread, and definitely not where it started.

footfootfoot · 08-26-2008, 07:12 PM

Yes it is. And thanks Dana, that's why you are on my christmas card list.

Aliantha · 08-26-2008, 07:21 PM

OK, so you carried the tripe to two threads then regardless of where it started. If you start something, why should you expect to come off looking holier than thou? You weren't funny. You were being a shit IMO and that's why I said what I did.

If others find your comments amusing, good for them. I did not.

eta: and to clarify, it started when I responded to your post number 28 in the Chinese market stall thread.

HungLikeJesus · 08-26-2008, 07:27 PM

Hang on. Are you saying that footfootfoot is really squirell nutkin? Or is squirell nutkin really footfootfoot?

Clodfobble · 08-26-2008, 07:37 PM

Yes. It was an alter-ego openly created a long time ago for drunk-posting purposes, but it has been awhile since he used it.

footfootfoot · 08-26-2008, 07:38 PM

Squirell nutkin is my churlish, and apparently unfunny, sock puppet. See his first thread.

I am not the first one to be the brunt of Ali's humor impairment/paranoic/grandiosity attacks nor will I, or Mr. Nutkin, be the last.

I am amused at how seriously she takes everything.

footfootfoot · 08-26-2008, 07:41 PM

Clodfobble, again is more concise and informative than I. I envy her ability to coherently put together thoughts and convey them in a readable manner.

When that sound thing is no longer fulfilling , you should take up writing; you'd kill like a champion.

DanaC · 08-26-2008, 08:23 PM

I must admit, Ali, to being a tad confused as to why you think he was being a shit with the public school comments. I fully accept you have a reason, but I just can't see it. He seemed, to me, to be making a satirical comment on the state of public schooling currently. I may be wrong, of course, but there didn't appear to be a personal attack in the initial comments at all.

Whatever, you are just as entitled as anyone else to take offence at something another dwellar posts and for your own reasons. Just puzzles me is all.

Aliantha · 08-26-2008, 08:30 PM

Just forget it Dana. It's not worth carrying on with. You thought it was witty. I did not. That's the end of it.

It's not even worth discussing.

For the record, I have never seen humour in people taking the piss out of others. It's why I don't like shows like 'The Chaser' over here. In this place it's given me the spurious title of someone who is 'humour impaired' etc. Who cares? Not everyone gets along, nor will they ever. I'm just as happy to be different as the same, and I don't really care if people like me or not because I do or don't find something funny. I find humour in different things than the mainstream posters here I guess. It's no big deal. I'm pretty sure someone else will be accusing me of being anti-american again soon. Whatever. Who cares? Same place same shit. Nothing ever changes.

DanaC · 08-26-2008, 09:05 PM

Quote:

For the record, I have never seen humour in people taking the piss out of others.

depends on the protagonists and the situation. Humour is entirely contextual. My point was, and I'll drop it after this comment: he didn't appear to be taking the piss out of anyone by commenting on public schools being breeding grounds of racism.

Trilby · 08-26-2008, 10:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Aliantha

Same place same shit. Nothing ever changes.

The only thing that can ever change is your own self (and I don't mean just you, Ali) it's the only thing anyone can ever change and it's damn hard work.

I just get the impression that you are a bit unhappy and that's perfectly within the realm of usual human conditions. I wish you well and I wish you peace but mostly I wish you some serenity and happiness.

Now, if you feel I've stepped out of bounds by "making it seem you are this or that" you'd be wrong. I am only posting from my experiences with some of your posts. If you ARE happy and I am wrong, I apologize. But my wishes for you remain the same.

Aliantha · 08-26-2008, 10:48 PM

Thanks for your thought Bri, but I'm perfectly happy with my life. It's pretty good actually. I've been lucky.

Unfortunately mud sticks, and a few things I said in my early days here don't seem to come off regardless of what I say or do.

People said I shouldn't have an opinion on US politics so I've basically stopped commenting (more or less) in politics or current events.

People say I have no sense of humour, but maybe I just don't put enough smiley faces in my posts.

People say I'm anti american, but I can tell you that's a lie whether you believe it or not.

The problem with this place is, people like to pidgeonhole people because it makes them feel something. Maybe safe. I don't really know. Of course, it doesn't just happen here. It happens on most internet forums because once you say something, it's there for good and those who decide they've an axe to grind will never forget it.

I haven't posted on here too much over the last 6 or 8 months up till the last few weeks or so because I was just tired of it, and then the first time I have a slight issue with something someone else has posted it becomes a big deal. It's not necessary and it doesn't say anything about me or my well being. Basically I'm tired and grumpy most days lately, but that doesn't mean I'm not basically a happy person. I have the same amount of sadness as everyone else more or less. There have been bad things in my life, but everyone has bad stuff happen from time to time. Maybe I do harbour some anger at some people here after sharing a couple of bad things that've happened to me and then had people basically tell me to get over it. I didn't see anyone telling you to 'just get over' your cancer. I don't mean to personalize this post in a bad way, but it's true. Some people get support from this site, and others don't so much.

Bri, I know we've had words in the past and regardless of who was right or wrong, or even if we both were, it's in the past and I don't hold any grudge against you. I honestly don't, and I'm very happy you're doing well. You have the right to comment on anything i post just as everyone else does, but really to be honest with you, this whole discussion is upsetting me. I don't think I deserve it. I really think foot3 knew what he was doing when he made very similar comments in threads I was posting in and he did it to stir me up. I foolishly responded and I just don't think it's fair that I should be the one to look like I'm being unreasonable.

Anyway, that's it for me. Once again, thanks for your thoughts, yours too Dana; and foot3, I'm not angry at you either. If it makes you all feel better, I'll just accept that I should have just ignored you or laughed at you. Unfortunately for all of us I do have an issue with the whole public versus private school debate and I take it very seriously because it affects so many kids who really aren't responsible for their parents decisions.

08-26-2008, 08:59 AM	#18
classicman barely disguised asshole, keeper of all that is holy. Join Date: Nov 2007 Posts: 23,401	lol - yes I did xoB. I surtinly dun did. __________________ "like strapping a pillow on a bull in a china shop" Bullitt

08-26-2008, 07:12 PM	#20
footfootfoot To shreds, you say? Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: in the house and on the street-how many, many feet we meet! Posts: 18,449	Yes it is. And thanks Dana, that's why you are on my christmas card list. __________________ The internet is a hateful stew of vomit you can never take completely seriously. - Her Fobs

08-26-2008, 07:21 PM	#21
Aliantha trying hard to be a better person Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Brisbane, Australia Posts: 16,493	OK, so you carried the tripe to two threads then regardless of where it started. If you start something, why should you expect to come off looking holier than thou? You weren't funny. You were being a shit IMO and that's why I said what I did. If others find your comments amusing, good for them. I did not. eta: and to clarify, it started when I responded to your post number 28 in the Chinese market stall thread. __________________ Kind words are the music of the world. F. W. Faber

08-26-2008, 07:27 PM	#22
HungLikeJesus Only looks like a disaster tourist Join Date: Feb 2007 Location: above 7,000 feet Posts: 7,208	Hang on. Are you saying that footfootfoot is really squirell nutkin? Or is squirell nutkin really footfootfoot? __________________ Keep Your Bodies Off My Lawn SteveDallas's Random Thread Picker.

08-26-2008, 07:37 PM	#23
Clodfobble UNDER CONDITIONAL MITIGATION Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Austin, TX Posts: 20,012	Yes. It was an alter-ego openly created a long time ago for drunk-posting purposes, but it has been awhile since he used it. __________________ My book My other book My spirit animal

08-26-2008, 07:40 AM	#16
DanaC We have to go back, Kate! Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Yorkshire Posts: 25,964	Forgive me if this is out of turn Ali, but I think you were over harsh in your initial reaction. A flippant comment is not the worst sin in the world and hardly unusual/out of place in a Cellar thread, even a pretty serious one. It was a witty aside that made a comment about racism in schools. Not an attack on you or an attempt to reduce the situation itself. For myself I had an interesting situation when me and J were together. His dad is adorable. I love his dad. A thoroughly nice, gentle, clever, funny and affectionate guy. His step-mum is also lovely. She can be a tad prickly from time to time when stressed and is.....in her own way mad as a hatter (to look at, think someone from 1920s Berlin crossed with a little 60s Carnaby class) but very sweet and generous and never shirked from the difficulties of bringing up a deeply troubled 11 year old step-son. I got on well (and still do on the occasional visit) with them. His actual mother, however, was another matter. How many people here have had the fun experience of going to work for their partner's estranged (but recently back in contact) mother, only to have her burn down her own business and try to fit them up for it? How many people here have been arrested at 6am on a Sunday morning, stuck in a cell without any shoelaces or belt, held for several hours of heavy questioning until they start to believe maybe they did drop a lit cig into a basket? How many people here have sat in such a cell, wondering if they might actually go down for a ten year stretch for an arson they were fairly sure was nothing to do with them? Now, that, my friends is a mad MIL (only an honorary MIL, as me and J never made it official). Fortunately, it turned out she had form on the whole arson thing, so that was that. I was 20 at the time. Scared the shit out of me.

08-26-2008, 07:38 PM	#24
footfootfoot To shreds, you say? Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: in the house and on the street-how many, many feet we meet! Posts: 18,449	Squirell nutkin is my churlish, and apparently unfunny, sock puppet. See his first thread. I am not the first one to be the brunt of Ali's humor impairment/paranoic/grandiosity attacks nor will I, or Mr. Nutkin, be the last. I am amused at how seriously she takes everything. __________________ The internet is a hateful stew of vomit you can never take completely seriously. - Her Fobs

08-26-2008, 07:41 PM	#25
footfootfoot To shreds, you say? Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: in the house and on the street-how many, many feet we meet! Posts: 18,449	Clodfobble, again is more concise and informative than I. I envy her ability to coherently put together thoughts and convey them in a readable manner. When that sound thing is no longer fulfilling , you should take up writing; you'd kill like a champion. __________________ The internet is a hateful stew of vomit you can never take completely seriously. - Her Fobs

08-26-2008, 08:23 PM	#26
DanaC We have to go back, Kate! Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Yorkshire Posts: 25,964	I must admit, Ali, to being a tad confused as to why you think he was being a shit with the public school comments. I fully accept you have a reason, but I just can't see it. He seemed, to me, to be making a satirical comment on the state of public schooling currently. I may be wrong, of course, but there didn't appear to be a personal attack in the initial comments at all. Whatever, you are just as entitled as anyone else to take offence at something another dwellar posts and for your own reasons. Just puzzles me is all.

08-26-2008, 08:30 PM	#27
Aliantha trying hard to be a better person Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Brisbane, Australia Posts: 16,493	Just forget it Dana. It's not worth carrying on with. You thought it was witty. I did not. That's the end of it. It's not even worth discussing. For the record, I have never seen humour in people taking the piss out of others. It's why I don't like shows like 'The Chaser' over here. In this place it's given me the spurious title of someone who is 'humour impaired' etc. Who cares? Not everyone gets along, nor will they ever. I'm just as happy to be different as the same, and I don't really care if people like me or not because I do or don't find something funny. I find humour in different things than the mainstream posters here I guess. It's no big deal. I'm pretty sure someone else will be accusing me of being anti-american again soon. Whatever. Who cares? Same place same shit. Nothing ever changes. __________________ Kind words are the music of the world. F. W. Faber

08-26-2008, 10:48 PM	#30
Aliantha trying hard to be a better person Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Brisbane, Australia Posts: 16,493	Thanks for your thought Bri, but I'm perfectly happy with my life. It's pretty good actually. I've been lucky. Unfortunately mud sticks, and a few things I said in my early days here don't seem to come off regardless of what I say or do. People said I shouldn't have an opinion on US politics so I've basically stopped commenting (more or less) in politics or current events. People say I have no sense of humour, but maybe I just don't put enough smiley faces in my posts. People say I'm anti american, but I can tell you that's a lie whether you believe it or not. The problem with this place is, people like to pidgeonhole people because it makes them feel something. Maybe safe. I don't really know. Of course, it doesn't just happen here. It happens on most internet forums because once you say something, it's there for good and those who decide they've an axe to grind will never forget it. I haven't posted on here too much over the last 6 or 8 months up till the last few weeks or so because I was just tired of it, and then the first time I have a slight issue with something someone else has posted it becomes a big deal. It's not necessary and it doesn't say anything about me or my well being. Basically I'm tired and grumpy most days lately, but that doesn't mean I'm not basically a happy person. I have the same amount of sadness as everyone else more or less. There have been bad things in my life, but everyone has bad stuff happen from time to time. Maybe I do harbour some anger at some people here after sharing a couple of bad things that've happened to me and then had people basically tell me to get over it. I didn't see anyone telling you to 'just get over' your cancer. I don't mean to personalize this post in a bad way, but it's true. Some people get support from this site, and others don't so much. Bri, I know we've had words in the past and regardless of who was right or wrong, or even if we both were, it's in the past and I don't hold any grudge against you. I honestly don't, and I'm very happy you're doing well. You have the right to comment on anything i post just as everyone else does, but really to be honest with you, this whole discussion is upsetting me. I don't think I deserve it. I really think foot3 knew what he was doing when he made very similar comments in threads I was posting in and he did it to stir me up. I foolishly responded and I just don't think it's fair that I should be the one to look like I'm being unreasonable. Anyway, that's it for me. Once again, thanks for your thoughts, yours too Dana; and foot3, I'm not angry at you either. If it makes you all feel better, I'll just accept that I should have just ignored you or laughed at you. Unfortunately for all of us I do have an issue with the whole public versus private school debate and I take it very seriously because it affects so many kids who really aren't responsible for their parents decisions. __________________ Kind words are the music of the world. F. W. Faber

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