07-16-2010, 11:47 AM | #3527 |
Snowflake
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Dystopia
Posts: 13,136
|
Image #3 is a real product, image #4 is from http://xkcd.com/.
__________________
****************** There's a level of facility that everyone needs to accomplish, and from there it's a matter of deciding for yourself how important ultra-facility is to your expression. ... I found, like Joseph Campbell said, if you just follow whatever gives you a little joy or excitement or awe, then you're on the right track. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Terry Bozzio |
07-16-2010, 11:48 AM | #3528 |
barely disguised asshole, keeper of all that is holy.
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 23,401
|
Yeh - I'm feeling too lazy to go find and put them in different threadsssssss
I threw 'em all here - enjoy ... or not.
__________________
"like strapping a pillow on a bull in a china shop" Bullitt |
07-16-2010, 01:22 PM | #3529 |
barely disguised asshole, keeper of all that is holy.
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 23,401
|
Granddad was reminiscing about the good old days..........
"When I was a boy, my Momma would send me down to the corner store with a dollar. I'd come back with five pounds of potatoes, two loaves of bread, three pints of milk, a pound of cheese, a box of tea, and a half a dozen eggs. You can't do that now. Too many security cameras."
__________________
"like strapping a pillow on a bull in a china shop" Bullitt |
07-20-2010, 09:52 PM | #3530 |
I hear them call the tide
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Perpetual Chaos
Posts: 30,852
|
__________________
The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart |
07-20-2010, 11:13 PM | #3531 |
Coronation Incarnate
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 94
|
gangster
|
07-20-2010, 11:28 PM | #3532 |
trying hard to be a better person
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Brisbane, Australia
Posts: 16,493
|
Rick Astley asked to borrow some Pixar movies. I said "You can have Toy Story and WALL-E, but I'm never gonna give you Up."
__________________
Kind words are the music of the world. F. W. Faber |
07-21-2010, 10:15 PM | #3533 |
barely disguised asshole, keeper of all that is holy.
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 23,401
|
DISCUSSION EXPLANATION
A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
__________________
"like strapping a pillow on a bull in a china shop" Bullitt |
07-22-2010, 07:52 AM | #3534 |
Beware of potatoes
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Upstate NY, USA
Posts: 2,078
|
The Man Rules
We always hear " the rules" From the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side . These are our rules! Please note? these are all numbered "1 " ON PURPOSE! Men are NOT mind readers. 1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down. 1. Man’s relaxation time: It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be. 1. WE’RE NOT INTERESTED IN WHAT OPRAH OR DR PHIL THINK. WE ALSO DON’T CARE WHAT A “NORMAL” PERSON WOULD DO. 1. Crying is blackmail. 1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one : Subtle hints do not work ! Strong hints do not work ! Obvious hints do not work ! Just say it! 1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question. 1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That 's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for. 1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact , all comments become Null and void after 7 Days. 1. If you think you're fat, you probably are . Don't ask us. 1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one. 1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself. 1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials, and not WHENEVER RUSH IS ON. 1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we. 1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is a MELON. We have no idea what mauve is. 1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that. 1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle. 1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear. 1. When we have to go somewhere, ALMOST anything you wear is fine... Really . 1.. You have enough clothes. 1. You have too many shoes. 1. I am in shape. Round or OVAL IS a shape! 1. Thank you for reading this.
__________________
"I believe that being despised by the despicable is as good as being admired by the admirable." |
07-22-2010, 10:39 AM | #3535 |
Makes some feel uncomfortable
Join Date: Dec 2005
Posts: 10,346
|
That's funny, Spud
__________________
"I'm certainly free, nay compelled, to spread the gospel of Spex. " - xoxoxoBruce |
07-22-2010, 10:41 AM | #3536 |
Why, you're a regular Alfred E Einstein, ain't ya?
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 21,206
|
__________________
A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones who need the advice. --Bill Cosby |
07-23-2010, 11:28 AM | #3537 |
Back in 10
Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 3,684
|
The hardest part of being a seeing eye dog!
__________________
Speaking simply... do not confuse this with having a simple mind. |
07-23-2010, 10:04 PM | #3538 |
“Hypocrisy: prejudice with a halo”
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Savannah, Georgia
Posts: 21,393
|
> THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
> > 1. Innovative > > 2. Preliminary > > 3. Proliferation > > > 4. Cinnamon > > > > > > > > THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK: > > 1. Specificity > > 2. Anti-constitutionalistically > > > 3. Passive-aggressive disorder > > 4. Transubstantiate > > > > > > > THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN > DRUNK: > > 1. No thanks, I’m married. > > > 2. Nope, no more booze for me! > > 3. Sorry, but you’re not really my type. > > 4. Taco Bell ? No thanks, I’m not hungry. > > 5. Good evening, officer. Isn’t it lovely out tonight? > > 6. Oh, I couldn’t! No one wants to hear me sing karaoke. > > > 7. I’m not interested in fighting you. > > 8. Thank you, but I won’t make any attempt to dance, I have no > coordination. I’d hate to look like a fool! > > 9. Where is the nearest bathroom? I refuse to pee in this parking lot or on the side of the road. > > > 10. I must be going home now, as I have to work in the morning. >
__________________
Anyone but the this most fuked up President in History in 2012! |
07-24-2010, 12:16 PM | #3539 |
The future is unwritten
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 71,105
|
Children's books
Daddy Has an Itch. Mommy Smells Like Fish: A Child’s Rhyming Guide to STD’s The Best Things to Drink Are under the Sink Toy Story 3: Buzz Gets a Woody Is Angelina My Mommy? Where the Wild Thongs Are The Smith & Wesson Coloring Book for Kids Ashley Has Two Daddies, and They’re Both Going to Burn in Hell Dismemberment Donny Needs A Hand The Secret Pot Garden Princess Poledancer And The Twirly Tassle Gang Santa Clause, The Tooth Fairy & The Easter Bunny: Just The Beginning of a Lifetime of Lies Math Will Make You Ugly The Magical World beneath the Tarp on the Pool All Alone with the Internet: A Choose Your Own Adventure Story. The Fog in the Looking Glass (and Other Ways to Find Out if Grandma’s Still with Us) A Buzzing in the Night: Why Your Wii Control’s Batteries Are Gone It’s Not that Grandpa Doesn’t Love You, He Just Loves Drinking More You Don’t Need to Think When You’re Pretty Furious George Gets Cut Off on the Freeway Why Do Grandma’s Boobies Touch Her Waist? (And Other Questions Not to Ask Out Loud) Rachel Has Seven Mommies: A Children’s Guide to the Book of Mormon Things We Can’t Afford because Your Father Left Us One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Mercury Poisoning Frog And Toad Are Friends with Benefits
__________________
The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump. |
07-24-2010, 02:58 PM | #3540 |
I hear them call the tide
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Perpetual Chaos
Posts: 30,852
|
I like those, xoB
__________________
The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart |
Tags |
humor |
Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 39 (0 members and 39 guests) | |
|
|