What is pissing you off this time? - Page 27

Sundae · 11-28-2011, 11:08 AM

Ali, he's a shithead.
It doesn't look as if Mav and Aden had any confusion about the dates, so it's all down to him.

You were prepared to allow your boys to visit a man who has not stepped up to the parenting mark on the most precious family season (in the West). Good on you. If he screws this up he will have even more bridges to build.

I dunno about his side of things.
I admit I can micromanage and hyper-organise, so it might be he would always look like the villain to me.
But changing plans with two weeks notice - especially at Christmas - is dicking about in my book.

classicman · 11-28-2011, 04:25 PM

My oh my can I relate. I interact with my ex all the time and its always just as you wrote above.
I'm dealing with the exact same thing right now over his speech. Its not enough about HER. Ferfuxache!

Just try to stay above it all.

It was rather reassuring to read the other poster's comments. I always wonder if I'm the one causing the issues even though deep down I know I'm not.

Aliantha · 11-28-2011, 04:27 PM

Thanks guys. I posted it here to get some feedback about whether I was being reasonable or not. He does this every single time there's an arrangement to be made, and all this on top of the fact that he owes us $600 from over a year ago that he asked for when he first married his new wife but had no money when they first came back here from Samoa. He said it was to pay a bond on a flat, and then the next thing he's in another country.

Glatt, thanks. I should have done that myself, but couldn't see properly for the steam coming out of my ears.

I don't care about my name. Anyone who does a half decent search around here could put that together anyway.

I have more to add here today. Cleo just jumped over the fence and bit the hand of the woman who walks her yappy poodles past our place every morning. It was just a nip, I suspect she was actually going for the yappiest one and the womans hand got in the way. By the time I got outside Cleo was cowering by the gate waiting to come back in. Fuck knows why she didn't just jump back in. Anyway, the woman who got bitten happens to be the woman who picked up every ball Max threw over the fence when he was little. She never bothered throwing them back into the yard they obviously came from. She put them in her pocket to take home for her yappy poodles.

Maybe our dogs figured it out and decided to make her pay.

So anyway, today will be spent putting trip wires up on the fence and gate out the front. The back is already done, so at least it's only about 30 metres or so to do.

monster · 11-28-2011, 05:47 PM

Fucking eye doctors, fucking beest, fucking kids, fucking people, in fucking general. and fucking carrots.

go ahead smart-arse away.

fuck it

DucksNuts · 11-28-2011, 06:13 PM

What is it with dogs this week?

Yesterday I took Jackson & Lucy for their normal walk on the beach, now our beach is dog friendly and has "off leash" policy.

Most of the time Jackson doesnt leave my side, he's actually obsessed with being so close to me and touching my hand....its annoying, but cute.

Yesterday, he sees a lady walking in the distance and took off, Lucy did as well. I bellowed at her and she hesitated, looked back, then went "fuck it, he's still going". So this poor lady had two quite big dogs charging towards her, and Jackson just jumps all over her!! (he doesnt jump on me because he knows its wrong, but he needs to learn that of other people as well).

I finally got Lucy to listen and she came back, Jackson just kept doing his thing, ignoring me.

Then when Lucy and I started walking in the other direction, he decided to come too. I put him on the lead and he just sat on his arse, wouldnt walk, wouldnt move. So I dragged his arse along for a good 50 metres before he decided it would be better to walk.

Now, Im worried about letting him off in case he does it again. We do training every day, he sits, he stays, he waits and wont touch his food until told...but obviously thats when he WANTS to listen.

Oh, and dude from 2 doors down yelled at Tyler last night about the Black Dog whos been hanging around. WTF? I was in the front yard, yell at me not the 8 year old, its not our fucking dog anyway and its certainly not OUR fault. Cockhead. I gave him whatfor!

sexobon · 11-28-2011, 06:15 PM

I couldn't find the pawn shop that has NhocCuteGirls. I thought I might get a good deal on them this week, maybe even free shipping!

Aliantha · 11-28-2011, 07:09 PM

Yep, dogs gone crazy this week.

We've just been to the hardware store and bought the stuff we need to increase the height of the fence another 18 inches. If she jumps over that I'll be surprised. I'm pretty sure she would still be able to get out if she really wanted to, but I'm going to work on the premise that she'll say, "ah fuck that" when she sees the fence is now higher than her head when she puts her front feet up.

DucksNuts · 11-28-2011, 09:55 PM

Oh Ali, I meant to comment on Kal....

Ex's are shit, all of them. All ex's should sent to a remote island where they cant do anymore damage and can all hook up.

Bit harsh of him to put Mav on the spot like that, I cant stand it when they involve the kids or use them as instruments....plus bit rude getting his missus to act as a go between and THEN tell Mav to make sure you watch your mouth.

I say kick him in the cunt

zippyt · 11-28-2011, 10:01 PM

like this ??

BigV · 11-28-2011, 11:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Clodfobble

Damn it, I'm sorry to hear about so many unreliable and immature ex's on the cellar today. Sorry Ali. You're right to let the boys make their own decisions. They're old enough to know that their dad is being a douche.

for the record, there are several reliable and mature exes on the cellar too.

I fancy myself one. We all know others. It's just that the immature ones get the press.

BigV · 11-28-2011, 11:24 PM

Aliantha--

It seems clear to me, and to your sons as well, what is going on here. It seems to me that their Dad is putting his desires ahead of the desires of his sons. Or, you can use the phrase "best interests" if you prefer.

Sometimes that's warranted, I think it's a big and easy mistake to spoil a child. I don't say yes to everything. So, sometimes SonofV doesn't get his way. However, I do keep as my guiding principle "What is in his best interest?" Changing plans, established agreed upon plans like this very close to the action date can certainly be a problem. But to me, the greater harm is by putting them in the middle. That's straight bullshit.

They're kids. They do get to have some say in things, but making them choose, or putting them in a position where they have to say yes to one and no to another. Being in a position where the would feel responsible for letting down one of the parents is bad enough, but for a parent to put them there is inexcusable.

Pick me! says one

bullshit.

Who's the decider? Who's the adult?

I have had my share of that same shit and I hate it.

Aliantha · 11-28-2011, 11:57 PM

Well, they didn't really want to go right from the start, but I encouraged them to go and spend some time with their father. He is still their father even if I do think he's an arsehole a lot of the time. That's why we broke up in the first place. Because we couldn't get along.

I've told them that if they still don't really want to go, then I'm not going to have anything more to say about it, and i'll deal with their father from here on in if that's what they want. He was supposed to talk to them last night on skype, but he never showed up. What's new? So anyway, bugger him. I just feel sorry for his new family.

DucksNuts · 11-29-2011, 12:51 AM

Hahaha, Zippy!! I love that. I may post it on facebook next time I feel that way inclined.

Aliantha · 11-29-2011, 03:31 AM

Well, the boys told their father they think he should come and see them and that they don't want to go to NZ at Christmas this year, so they're not going which is good as far as I'm concerned. I hope they don't regret it, but in the end, I had to let them make the call and that's what they wanted.

We've put the extension on the fence today. Looks not too bad. It was longer than I thought though. We were about 5 metres short on the wire, but it should be fine till I go out next. The bit that's not done is more for continuity than an area she's likely to jump over anyway, not to mention that the hedging trees are there and would make it a pretty broad jump anyway.

zippyt · 11-29-2011, 07:42 AM

Well lets see what Dadz has to say about that !
prolly LOTS after he speaks to Wifey ,

11-28-2011, 11:08 AM	#391
Sundae polaroid of perfection Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: West Yorkshire Posts: 24,185	Ali, he's a shithead. It doesn't look as if Mav and Aden had any confusion about the dates, so it's all down to him. You were prepared to allow your boys to visit a man who has not stepped up to the parenting mark on the most precious family season (in the West). Good on you. If he screws this up he will have even more bridges to build. I dunno about his side of things. I admit I can micromanage and hyper-organise, so it might be he would always look like the villain to me. But changing plans with two weeks notice - especially at Christmas - is dicking about in my book. __________________ Life's hard you know, so strike a pose on a Cadillac

11-28-2011, 04:25 PM	#392
classicman barely disguised asshole, keeper of all that is holy. Join Date: Nov 2007 Posts: 23,401	My oh my can I relate. I interact with my ex all the time and its always just as you wrote above. I'm dealing with the exact same thing right now over his speech. Its not enough about HER. Ferfuxache! Just try to stay above it all. It was rather reassuring to read the other poster's comments. I always wonder if I'm the one causing the issues even though deep down I know I'm not. __________________ "like strapping a pillow on a bull in a china shop" Bullitt

11-28-2011, 04:27 PM	#393
Aliantha trying hard to be a better person Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Brisbane, Australia Posts: 16,493	Thanks guys. I posted it here to get some feedback about whether I was being reasonable or not. He does this every single time there's an arrangement to be made, and all this on top of the fact that he owes us $600 from over a year ago that he asked for when he first married his new wife but had no money when they first came back here from Samoa. He said it was to pay a bond on a flat, and then the next thing he's in another country. Glatt, thanks. I should have done that myself, but couldn't see properly for the steam coming out of my ears. I don't care about my name. Anyone who does a half decent search around here could put that together anyway. I have more to add here today. Cleo just jumped over the fence and bit the hand of the woman who walks her yappy poodles past our place every morning. It was just a nip, I suspect she was actually going for the yappiest one and the womans hand got in the way. By the time I got outside Cleo was cowering by the gate waiting to come back in. Fuck knows why she didn't just jump back in. Anyway, the woman who got bitten happens to be the woman who picked up every ball Max threw over the fence when he was little. She never bothered throwing them back into the yard they obviously came from. She put them in her pocket to take home for her yappy poodles. Maybe our dogs figured it out and decided to make her pay. So anyway, today will be spent putting trip wires up on the fence and gate out the front. The back is already done, so at least it's only about 30 metres or so to do. __________________ Kind words are the music of the world. F. W. Faber

11-28-2011, 05:47 PM	#394
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	Fucking eye doctors, fucking beest, fucking kids, fucking people, in fucking general. and fucking carrots. go ahead smart-arse away. fuck it __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

11-28-2011, 07:09 PM	#397
Aliantha trying hard to be a better person Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Brisbane, Australia Posts: 16,493	Yep, dogs gone crazy this week. We've just been to the hardware store and bought the stuff we need to increase the height of the fence another 18 inches. If she jumps over that I'll be surprised. I'm pretty sure she would still be able to get out if she really wanted to, but I'm going to work on the premise that she'll say, "ah fuck that" when she sees the fence is now higher than her head when she puts her front feet up. __________________ Kind words are the music of the world. F. W. Faber

11-28-2011, 06:13 PM	#395
DucksNuts Bitchy Little Brat Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Queensland, Australia Posts: 5,067	What is it with dogs this week? Yesterday I took Jackson & Lucy for their normal walk on the beach, now our beach is dog friendly and has "off leash" policy. Most of the time Jackson doesnt leave my side, he's actually obsessed with being so close to me and touching my hand....its annoying, but cute. Yesterday, he sees a lady walking in the distance and took off, Lucy did as well. I bellowed at her and she hesitated, looked back, then went "fuck it, he's still going". So this poor lady had two quite big dogs charging towards her, and Jackson just jumps all over her!! (he doesnt jump on me because he knows its wrong, but he needs to learn that of other people as well). I finally got Lucy to listen and she came back, Jackson just kept doing his thing, ignoring me. Then when Lucy and I started walking in the other direction, he decided to come too. I put him on the lead and he just sat on his arse, wouldnt walk, wouldnt move. So I dragged his arse along for a good 50 metres before he decided it would be better to walk. Now, Im worried about letting him off in case he does it again. We do training every day, he sits, he stays, he waits and wont touch his food until told...but obviously thats when he WANTS to listen. Oh, and dude from 2 doors down yelled at Tyler last night about the Black Dog whos been hanging around. WTF? I was in the front yard, yell at me not the 8 year old, its not our fucking dog anyway and its certainly not OUR fault. Cockhead. I gave him whatfor!

11-28-2011, 06:15 PM	#396
sexobon I love it when a plan comes together. Join Date: Oct 2009 Posts: 9,793	I couldn't find the pawn shop that has NhocCuteGirls. I thought I might get a good deal on them this week, maybe even free shipping!

11-28-2011, 09:55 PM	#398
DucksNuts Bitchy Little Brat Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Queensland, Australia Posts: 5,067	Oh Ali, I meant to comment on Kal.... Ex's are shit, all of them. All ex's should sent to a remote island where they cant do anymore damage and can all hook up. Bit harsh of him to put Mav on the spot like that, I cant stand it when they involve the kids or use them as instruments....plus bit rude getting his missus to act as a go between and THEN tell Mav to make sure you watch your mouth. I say kick him in the cunt

11-28-2011, 10:01 PM	#399
zippyt LONG LIVE KING ZIPPY! per Feetz Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Arkansas Posts: 7,661	like this ?? Attached Images __________________ "Success is getting what you want. Happiness is wanting what you get. " Brother Dave Gardner

11-28-2011, 11:24 PM	#401
BigV Goon Squad Leader Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Seattle Posts: 27,063	Aliantha-- It seems clear to me, and to your sons as well, what is going on here. It seems to me that their Dad is putting his desires ahead of the desires of his sons. Or, you can use the phrase "best interests" if you prefer. Sometimes that's warranted, I think it's a big and easy mistake to spoil a child. I don't say yes to everything. So, sometimes SonofV doesn't get his way. However, I do keep as my guiding principle "What is in his best interest?" Changing plans, established agreed upon plans like this very close to the action date can certainly be a problem. But to me, the greater harm is by putting them in the middle. That's straight bullshit. They're kids. They do get to have some say in things, but making them choose, or putting them in a position where they have to say yes to one and no to another. Being in a position where the would feel responsible for letting down one of the parents is bad enough, but for a parent to put them there is inexcusable. Pick me! says one bullshit. Who's the decider? Who's the adult? I have had my share of that same shit and I hate it. __________________ Be Just and Fear Not.

11-28-2011, 11:57 PM	#402
Aliantha trying hard to be a better person Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Brisbane, Australia Posts: 16,493	Well, they didn't really want to go right from the start, but I encouraged them to go and spend some time with their father. He is still their father even if I do think he's an arsehole a lot of the time. That's why we broke up in the first place. Because we couldn't get along. I've told them that if they still don't really want to go, then I'm not going to have anything more to say about it, and i'll deal with their father from here on in if that's what they want. He was supposed to talk to them last night on skype, but he never showed up. What's new? So anyway, bugger him. I just feel sorry for his new family. __________________ Kind words are the music of the world. F. W. Faber

11-29-2011, 12:51 AM	#403
DucksNuts Bitchy Little Brat Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Queensland, Australia Posts: 5,067	Hahaha, Zippy!! I love that. I may post it on facebook next time I feel that way inclined.

11-29-2011, 03:31 AM	#404
Aliantha trying hard to be a better person Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Brisbane, Australia Posts: 16,493	Well, the boys told their father they think he should come and see them and that they don't want to go to NZ at Christmas this year, so they're not going which is good as far as I'm concerned. I hope they don't regret it, but in the end, I had to let them make the call and that's what they wanted. We've put the extension on the fence today. Looks not too bad. It was longer than I thought though. We were about 5 metres short on the wire, but it should be fine till I go out next. The bit that's not done is more for continuity than an area she's likely to jump over anyway, not to mention that the hedging trees are there and would make it a pretty broad jump anyway. __________________ Kind words are the music of the world. F. W. Faber

11-29-2011, 07:42 AM	#405
zippyt LONG LIVE KING ZIPPY! per Feetz Join Date: Mar 2003 Location: Arkansas Posts: 7,661	Well lets see what Dadz has to say about that ! prolly LOTS after he speaks to Wifey , __________________ "Success is getting what you want. Happiness is wanting what you get. " Brother Dave Gardner

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