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#451 |
To shreds, you say?
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: in the house and on the street-how many, many feet we meet!
Posts: 18,449
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"I don't like Saint Bernard houses."
"Where do you see a St.Bernard house?" "Over there." (Points to woods as we drive along.) "What makes them 'Saint Bernard' houses?" "Because they look like apple trees."
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The internet is a hateful stew of vomit you can never take completely seriously. - Her Fobs |
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#452 |
Snowflake
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Dystopia
Posts: 13,136
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lol ... I understand that convo, totally, not ... what a creative time in the human brain development
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****************** There's a level of facility that everyone needs to accomplish, and from there it's a matter of deciding for yourself how important ultra-facility is to your expression. ... I found, like Joseph Campbell said, if you just follow whatever gives you a little joy or excitement or awe, then you're on the right track. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Terry Bozzio |
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#453 |
UNDER CONDITIONAL MITIGATION
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Austin, TX
Posts: 20,012
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My 10-year-old stepdaughter was apparently planning on giving this to her math teacher. Fortunately she forgot and had it in her bag instead, so we saw it first.
![]() ......................................................................Why I don't have my homewerk .......................................................................................................right now in ........................................................................................................this room First of all, I did finish my homework, so please stop saying I didn't! Second of all, I tried to find it and I looked all over my house and my mom's car! When I finally figured out where it was, it was to late, becaue the school was closed! This morning I went to the lost and found to look for my things, but I didn't find it, which ment that I wouldn't get my things until the end of the school day! I don't know if your actually going to read what I'm writing, but my point is that I did do my homework and I finished it at 2:50 and if I had it right now I wouldn't have missed any more than probobly five questions. I know I am good in math, and misplacing one homework asignment will not change my opinion on my skill! I'm obviously mad, but not because of the punishment. I'm upset because you gave me the consequence of being lazy and not doing my homework, when I did finish it, and I am sure I did good on. If you really want to make sure, I'll show you it today when I get my paper back from the YMCA after school care, if Ms. Tanya (the consulor) still has it. My mom already knows that I left my homework there, but if you still want the signiture, then fine. Once again, I don't care about the punishment, I care more about my grade then recess. Everything I wrote in this is true, I can do another worksheet if you're really mad and want me to. I'm not saying that I like homework, by the way. .............................Signiture _________________ |
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#454 |
Why, you're a regular Alfred E Einstein, ain't ya?
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 21,206
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![]() I am completely in awe (and giggles) of that, Clod.
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A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones who need the advice. --Bill Cosby |
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#455 |
Why, you're a regular Alfred E Einstein, ain't ya?
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 21,206
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A friend of the family died a couple months ago, but I just heard this story. My brother and his wife took the girls to the visitation. Later, someone asked the 3 year old about it (gauging her curiosity, seeing if she had questions...that kind of thing.)
She shrugged and sighed and said "We got there and he was already dead." There's no mistaking she's my niece. ![]()
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A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones who need the advice. --Bill Cosby |
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#456 |
Snowflake
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Dystopia
Posts: 13,136
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The girl, doing her best Philippe.
Me: Why do you like wearing your shoes so much? Her: Because you're tall! Me: You like to wear your shoes because it makes you taller? Her: Yes! Me: What's so good about being tall? Her: EATING SAUSAGE!
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****************** There's a level of facility that everyone needs to accomplish, and from there it's a matter of deciding for yourself how important ultra-facility is to your expression. ... I found, like Joseph Campbell said, if you just follow whatever gives you a little joy or excitement or awe, then you're on the right track. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Terry Bozzio |
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#457 |
trying hard to be a better person
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Brisbane, Australia
Posts: 16,493
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OK, this has just made me laugh out loud at my kids and their mate.
For some reason they've decided to play 'shooting each other' games, and their collection of weapons is as follows. Aden has a tennis racquet machine gun, a cat toy flail, and a recorder hand gun. Mav is using an old broken fishing rod as a sniper rifle and their friend Mitch is using a stick they pulled out of the garden (probably one that was holding a plant up).
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Kind words are the music of the world. F. W. Faber |
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#459 |
I hear them call the tide
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Perpetual Chaos
Posts: 30,852
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It's because she was a bad mom and didn't buy them toys guns. My kids will shoot with anything too. One day Hector made a pistol from Lego that actually fired a brick
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The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart |
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#460 | |
is fleeing the scene
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Beautiful CO
Posts: 1,510
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Quote:
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Once, in an interview, Chuck Norris admitted that he was not the most awesome thing ever. He declined to elaborate; but I believe we all know that he was referring to the existence of chocolate covered bacon. I'd rather be judged by twelve than carried by six. |
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#461 |
Your Bartender
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Philly Burbs, PA
Posts: 7,651
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Impressive! Sign him up with the Defense Department!! When we invade Denmark we'll be able to forage native materials to build firearms on the fly.
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#462 | |
Vicariously, I live...
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: USA
Posts: 1,221
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Quote:
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I have some people I need to have smoted. ~ SteveDallas |
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#463 |
Kinda New Member
Join Date: Jun 2009
Posts: 1
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I was 14 , when my one of my 4 years old cousins said to me..You get spanked below, I saw your mother spanked you. Did she often do it, I think I was in the room, otherwise she should have spanked you naked. I was like what..haah. This little boy..
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#464 | |
is fleeing the scene
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Beautiful CO
Posts: 1,510
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Quote:
__________________
Once, in an interview, Chuck Norris admitted that he was not the most awesome thing ever. He declined to elaborate; but I believe we all know that he was referring to the existence of chocolate covered bacon. I'd rather be judged by twelve than carried by six. |
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#465 |
Squeebie Fleebie
Join Date: Jun 2009
Posts: 19
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I have one that's more me embarrassing my son than him saying something funny.
He comes out of the kitchen with a handful of nuts and says "you know, I like nuts by themselves, but I don't like them mixed up in things" and my husband and I just sat there giggling and snickering and he goes "ugh, you guys are supposed to be the mature ones". |
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humor |
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