What's upsetting you today? - Page 465

monster · 07-11-2011, 11:41 AM

Hard though it is, I think you need to respect her wishes and just be there for her. It may be that she is slowly changing her mind about seeing a doctor/telling people, and the first step is telling you. Be gentle and patient and be there. The treatments for breast cancer are horrible -mastectomy, chemotherapy, radiation, ongoing infusions and there are still a huge number of women who die anyway. And watching that is painful and heartbreaking. Your friend is not in denial, she's just choosing a different path. I think she has a right to her privacy, even if it's something her kids would want to know.

anonymous · 07-11-2011, 11:47 AM

All your responses have been immensely helpful. I am leaning towards what monster thinks: I have to respect her wishes, let her choose her path, which is what I told her yesterday. But I would be remiss if I didn't urge her one more time to at least see a doctor.

Maybe this was a next step in confronting it, and she can now tell more people, it being more "real" but I will also urge her to talk to her kids.

Another friend has some stuff going on RFN, but the reality is he brought the drama on himself, and I can't put aside what I am feeling for K, who didn't ask for any of it. Yet my heart is being pulled in all kinds of directions today.

Thanks again, everyone.

wolf · 07-11-2011, 12:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by anonymous

A friend told me this weekend that she has breast cancer.

Fuck Cancer.

If your friend is in the Philadelphia area, PM me. I have a friend who is a breast cancer surgeon and does a lot of work with extremely advanced cancers.

Sundae · 07-11-2011, 02:32 PM

Anon what an awful burden to bear.
For both of you.

Dying from cancer is hardly taking the easy road, so if she is speaking from a position of knowledge then all power to her.
But by not getting a diagnosis she really isn't helping herself or her family.

She will need some kind of medical assistance at some point.
If she chooses not to have teatment, all well and good. But she should at least find out what the options are.

How would her family feel if she finally went to the Doctors to have them say, "Six months ago we would have given you a good chance.... but now...."

You can only support her.
Tell her about Bri, and my Mum, and MTP and Tennant's Mum and all the rest.
She needs love. But also information.

And my very best wishes to you and her.

Aliantha · 07-17-2011, 09:49 PM

I have a really bad dose of tonsilitis which is compromising my whole immune system.

I have good drugs now. I should feel better soon.

infinite monkey · 07-20-2011, 12:08 PM

Students came in to tell us another student who was waiting was blowing her mouth and smacking her kid around. She said she could go get (let's say Buford) and HE would take care of us because he's a might powerful guy.

Then in speaking to the cow orker right next to me she mumbled that she would kill him.

Of course, the copperoonis are on it and FSM bless them for their presence.

Some people are too nutty to go out of their homes.

SamIam · 07-20-2011, 12:13 PM

Some people should be confined to their homes in solitary. Slapping her kid around? Buford and his evil twin should come slap HER around. Let her see how it feels.

infinite monkey · 07-20-2011, 12:41 PM

She was obviously batshit crazy.

These are the kind of people who don't have social skills developed well enough to know that you don't threaten people's lives.

The cops were with her for quite a while. Don't know what might transpire when she tells Buford about the indignities she faced.

Just another in a long line of chances for some crazed hilljack to kill people because the world didn't give them their ignorant desires.

footfootfoot · 07-20-2011, 03:34 PM

When one of my friends first moved up here she had a conversation with a local sheriff about life up here. She wrongly assumed that he wasn't busy most of the time. He told her he spent a lot of time dealing with people who'd had "stupid attacks"

She asked what a stupid attack was and he said, "Oh, you know; someone gets drunk and calls up his neighbor and leaves a message on the answering machine threatening to kill him and then leaves his name and number at the end of the message..."

Rrrraven · 07-20-2011, 04:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by footfootfoot

When one of my friends first moved up here she had a conversation with a local sheriff about life up here. She wrongly assumed that he wasn't busy most of the time. He told her he spent a lot of time dealing with people who'd had "stupid attacks"

A friend of mine who is a detective in one of the smaller, more rural areas of our county told me recently that when he was working patrol he got many calls from parents who couldn't get their child to go to school. So the parent would call 911. Patrol would go out, tell the kid they had to go to school and that was that. Crazy eh?

SamIam · 07-24-2011, 12:46 PM

I came up $43 short at the end of my night shift at the Bates Motel. I counted the money 3x, added up the ledger 3x, and I still couldn't get the books to balance. I went back and looked at the guest list and only two people paid cash for a single room - $43.00.

I think I know what happened. Four groups of guests decided to come in and clog our small lobby at the same time. One group were Italians who couldn't speak English, but were very voluable in Italian. I think between all the Italian going on, and trying to sign in everyone else, one man just didn't pay for his room and I didn't catch that in all the commotion.

This is the first time in the 9 months that have I worked here that something like this has happened. I was scared the manager would take the $43 bucks out of my pay, but she let it go - this time.

Some people are like predators, just waiting for the chance to score. If I had to rip someone off, I'd go for a mega outfit like Walmart. But even there, a real human cashier is going to have to bite the bullet when her cash drawer comes up short.

And to all you lurkers out there (because I know actual Cellar members wouldn't do this): People, guess what? When you get too much change and keep it or sneak by without paying for something, you are robbing the clerk standing in front of you who makes minimum wage - you are NOT ripping off "the company" or "big business" or whatever. The company maintains its profits in part, because their employees have to cover any shortages that occur on their shift.

This time, I didn't have to and, hopefully there will be no second time.

classicman · 07-24-2011, 12:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SamIam

their employees have to cover any shortages that occur on their shift.

Glad things worked out for you, but that is not always the case.
Still, the morally correct thing to do is correct the error.

SamIam · 07-24-2011, 02:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by classicman

Still, the morally correct thing to do is correct the error.

Who? Me or the thief? I was prepared to have that $43 deducted from my infitessimal pay check, but when the manager said to let it go, I let it go - with deep gratitude.

The other thing that pisses me off is that the thief wasn't say a poor Navajo who had got a ride into town and ended up stranded (we see a lot of folks in that sort of situation). The thief obviously had money - he was dressed well and had a late model car with vanity plates. He just got himself a free room because he could. By time I had discovered the error and figured out who it was, he had revved up his engine and hit the road. I hope he overheats on Red Mountain pass and no one will stop to help him. Let him sleep up there at 10,000 feet in his little sports car for free.

OK, I've ranted enough about this. The sun will come up in the morning.

classicman · 07-24-2011, 03:30 PM

No not you, the hypothetical person in your post.

glatt · 07-24-2011, 08:13 PM

My cousin actually posted on Facebook when he got a bunch of lobsters for like a quarter of their actual price because a clerk made a mistake ringing it up. He was gloating about it. What a dick.

07-11-2011, 11:41 AM	#6961
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	Hard though it is, I think you need to respect her wishes and just be there for her. It may be that she is slowly changing her mind about seeing a doctor/telling people, and the first step is telling you. Be gentle and patient and be there. The treatments for breast cancer are horrible -mastectomy, chemotherapy, radiation, ongoing infusions and there are still a huge number of women who die anyway. And watching that is painful and heartbreaking. Your friend is not in denial, she's just choosing a different path. I think she has a right to her privacy, even if it's something her kids would want to know. __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

07-11-2011, 02:32 PM	#6964
Sundae polaroid of perfection Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: West Yorkshire Posts: 24,185	Anon what an awful burden to bear. For both of you. Dying from cancer is hardly taking the easy road, so if she is speaking from a position of knowledge then all power to her. But by not getting a diagnosis she really isn't helping herself or her family. She will need some kind of medical assistance at some point. If she chooses not to have teatment, all well and good. But she should at least find out what the options are. How would her family feel if she finally went to the Doctors to have them say, "Six months ago we would have given you a good chance.... but now...." You can only support her. Tell her about Bri, and my Mum, and MTP and Tennant's Mum and all the rest. She needs love. But also information. And my very best wishes to you and her. __________________ Life's hard you know, so strike a pose on a Cadillac

07-17-2011, 09:49 PM	#6965
Aliantha trying hard to be a better person Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Brisbane, Australia Posts: 16,493	I have a really bad dose of tonsilitis which is compromising my whole immune system. I have good drugs now. I should feel better soon. __________________ Kind words are the music of the world. F. W. Faber

07-20-2011, 03:34 PM	#6969
footfootfoot To shreds, you say? Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: in the house and on the street-how many, many feet we meet! Posts: 18,449	When one of my friends first moved up here she had a conversation with a local sheriff about life up here. She wrongly assumed that he wasn't busy most of the time. He told her he spent a lot of time dealing with people who'd had "stupid attacks" She asked what a stupid attack was and he said, "Oh, you know; someone gets drunk and calls up his neighbor and leaves a message on the answering machine threatening to kill him and then leaves his name and number at the end of the message..." __________________ The internet is a hateful stew of vomit you can never take completely seriously. - Her Fobs

07-24-2011, 03:30 PM	#6974
classicman barely disguised asshole, keeper of all that is holy. Join Date: Nov 2007 Posts: 23,401	No not you, the hypothetical person in your post. __________________ "like strapping a pillow on a bull in a china shop" Bullitt

07-11-2011, 11:47 AM	#6962
anonymous Operations Operative Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: in hiding Posts: 578	All your responses have been immensely helpful. I am leaning towards what monster thinks: I have to respect her wishes, let her choose her path, which is what I told her yesterday. But I would be remiss if I didn't urge her one more time to at least see a doctor. Maybe this was a next step in confronting it, and she can now tell more people, it being more "real" but I will also urge her to talk to her kids. Another friend has some stuff going on RFN, but the reality is he brought the drama on himself, and I can't put aside what I am feeling for K, who didn't ask for any of it. Yet my heart is being pulled in all kinds of directions today. Thanks again, everyone.

07-20-2011, 12:08 PM	#6966
infinite monkey Person who doesn't update the user title Join Date: Mar 2011 Posts: 13,002	Students came in to tell us another student who was waiting was blowing her mouth and smacking her kid around. She said she could go get (let's say Buford) and HE would take care of us because he's a might powerful guy. Then in speaking to the cow orker right next to me she mumbled that she would kill him. Of course, the copperoonis are on it and FSM bless them for their presence. Some people are too nutty to go out of their homes.

07-20-2011, 12:13 PM	#6967
SamIam Registered User Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Not here Posts: 2,655	Some people should be confined to their homes in solitary. Slapping her kid around? Buford and his evil twin should come slap HER around. Let her see how it feels.

07-20-2011, 12:41 PM	#6968
infinite monkey Person who doesn't update the user title Join Date: Mar 2011 Posts: 13,002	She was obviously batshit crazy. These are the kind of people who don't have social skills developed well enough to know that you don't threaten people's lives. The cops were with her for quite a while. Don't know what might transpire when she tells Buford about the indignities she faced. Just another in a long line of chances for some crazed hilljack to kill people because the world didn't give them their ignorant desires.

07-24-2011, 12:46 PM	#6971
SamIam Registered User Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Not here Posts: 2,655	I came up $43 short at the end of my night shift at the Bates Motel. I counted the money 3x, added up the ledger 3x, and I still couldn't get the books to balance. I went back and looked at the guest list and only two people paid cash for a single room - $43.00. I think I know what happened. Four groups of guests decided to come in and clog our small lobby at the same time. One group were Italians who couldn't speak English, but were very voluable in Italian. I think between all the Italian going on, and trying to sign in everyone else, one man just didn't pay for his room and I didn't catch that in all the commotion. This is the first time in the 9 months that have I worked here that something like this has happened. I was scared the manager would take the $43 bucks out of my pay, but she let it go - this time. Some people are like predators, just waiting for the chance to score. If I had to rip someone off, I'd go for a mega outfit like Walmart. But even there, a real human cashier is going to have to bite the bullet when her cash drawer comes up short. And to all you lurkers out there (because I know actual Cellar members wouldn't do this): People, guess what? When you get too much change and keep it or sneak by without paying for something, you are robbing the clerk standing in front of you who makes minimum wage - you are NOT ripping off "the company" or "big business" or whatever. The company maintains its profits in part, because their employees have to cover any shortages that occur on their shift. This time, I didn't have to and, hopefully there will be no second time.

07-24-2011, 08:13 PM	#6975
glatt ™ Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Arlington, VA Posts: 27,717	My cousin actually posted on Facebook when he got a bunch of lobsters for like a quarter of their actual price because a clerk made a mistake ringing it up. He was gloating about it. What a dick.

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