What's upsetting you today? - Page 479

classicman · 10-05-2011, 10:10 PM

Wow Ali - thats a lot of bad to deal with all at once. (Hugs)

classicman · 10-05-2011, 10:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by footfootfoot

Income.

I was shocked when I found out how little the jurisdiction actually got and how much the police pay to have them there.

I guess there is a savings involved also from not having an officer at the intersection, but still.

Lola Bunny · 10-06-2011, 12:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Aliantha

It started a couple of days ago.

Anyway, so the very next day, he sends me an email saying he wont be home till 9pm and I thought, well that's a start, but what happened was I left his dinner for him to reheat, but when he got home he said he'd already eaten, so I think, "fuck you with a fat stick sideways areshole! Don't you listen to a word I say???" I said nothing though because I'm sick of wasting my fucking breath.

.

Ali, men are really clueless sometimes. He heard you said wanted to know when he's coming home. So, he emailed you the time. Perhaps he thought 9PM is late and that meant he wouldn't be eating at home. Tell him again that you'd like to know if he'll be eating at home or not so you can leave him dinner. And yes, add that you would also like to know when he's coming home if you would also like that info. Trust me, he may drop that info and just say he's gonna eat or not. It's not that they don't listen, they just sometimes don't understand what we're trying to say. I hope you feel better, Ali.

classicman · 10-06-2011, 12:26 AM

I agree with Lola - Its all the woman's fault.

Aliantha · 10-06-2011, 01:14 AM

Lola, although I appreciate your suggestions, and they may partly be true, this is an ongoing issue which I've begged him to get help with because he's not getting the idea from me.

He had an abusive upbringing till he was about 12, after which time his mother basically left him to fend for himself. He's never learned how to care how his actions affect others and he was more or less single till we married 5 yrs ago. By single I mean he'd never really lived with a woman before. His living arrangements were either him by himself or with other bachelors.

He just has no idea, and after about 7 years of trying to show him a better way, I'm at my wits end. He needs counselling to deal with what happened to him as a child which is a direct catalyst to the type of behaviour I am trying to deal with now.

It's not that I don't love him or feel he doesn't love me. He just doesn't believe the issues are that bad, but they've just about reached breaking point because the kids are picking up his habits, and are starting to believe that's the way it's meant to be, and I'm not going to have that.

Anyway, can you tell I'm still pissed off?

Aliantha · 10-06-2011, 01:17 AM

Oh, and on top of that, my butthead brother hasn't apologised for his stupid decisions either. I'm surrounded by men who seem to think it's ok to treat me like a fucking idiot mushroom who needs to be fed a constant stream of shit.

DanaC · 10-06-2011, 06:13 AM

Ack, Ali, hon, that sounds horrid. Hate that churned up feeling. Hope today gets brighter. And as you say, at least today you feel in control.

Aliantha · 10-06-2011, 07:21 AM

Thanks Dana. I think I'll have a nice hot shower then go to bed soon. I'm buggered, and it'll be a big day tomorrow. They're letting my Aunt go home, and I'm the one who's going to be taking her there, so I guess I'll probably be pretty busy with her most of the day. Then some friends are having a party for their 20th wedding anniversary in the evening, and then footy break up party on Saturday. I think I'll need a holiday soon.

Gravdigr · 10-06-2011, 11:50 AM

A large, wet, muddy puddle under and around the fire hydrant in my front yard.

Sundae · 10-06-2011, 02:26 PM

Ali, just try to remember they are not doing this to hurt or upset you.
I'm sure both love you.

I'm not on a high horse, I'd be talking consideration and manners and all sorts of swear words if I was in that situation.
Maybe you & Dazza should consider counselling together. If'n you could ever get him there.
It doesn't mean crisis, it doesn't mean imminent break-up, it just means someone to mediate and give you ideas and examples of how to talk to eachother.

Re your bro - meh.
I can never please my sister. But then she doesn't give a shit about me. I'm only there to be complained about. Being blood does not mean thinking or feeling the same way.

It's shitty for you, but at least you have good people in your family so you can get the truth.

Hang in there chick.
Family (blood or marriage) conflict is the worst, because it leaves you without a safe haven.
Hope things get better.

Lola Bunny · 10-07-2011, 01:43 PM

Ali: Sorry to hear about your situation. I actually have more to say but being a single person, whatever opinions I have is just superficial and unrealistic to your situation. I hope everything will work out eventually. Btw, I'm glad today is better for you. (Saw your comment from another thread.

)

BrilliantDisguise · 10-07-2011, 02:02 PM

I'm upset because I feel like I'm losing a closeness I have with a friend that means a lot to me.

SamIam · 10-07-2011, 03:14 PM

This morning I woke up and went to put on my glasses when I discovered that the left lens had fallen out. Huh? I'm sure it was there when I was reading in bed last night. I'd have noticed it was missing because my eye sight is awful. I am legally blind without corrective lenses. My back-up glasses are an old pair that is so scratched up, they are almost worthless.

So, I started the search with only one eye. I looked EVERYWHERE - under the bed, beside the bed. I shook out all the bed clothes - nothing. I got out the broom and swept under the bed - nothing except a few dust balls. I checked the hamper in my bedroom, shaking everything out - nothing. I have gone over my bedroom three times now - nothing. That lens has got to be there, but its not.

It will cost me two or three hundred dollars to order a replacement lens. I don't have two or three hundred dollars. And I bet as soon as I go down and order it (assuming I can scrape the money up), the damn lens will turn up somewhere. I'm probably missing it because I can only see out of one eye.

And I have a headache.

Damn, damn, damn...

TheMercenary · 10-07-2011, 03:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by classicman

I was shocked when I found out how little the jurisdiction actually got and how much the police pay to have them there.

I guess there is a savings involved also from not having an officer at the intersection, but still.

It's developed into a business. I think that is among the biggest complaints about them, not that they don't catch speeders or people who run the red lights. We have a few here.

footfootfoot · 10-07-2011, 04:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SamIam

It will cost me two or three hundred dollars to order a replacement lens. I don't have two or three hundred dollars. And I bet as soon as I go down and order it (assuming I can scrape the money up), the damn lens will turn up somewhere. I'm probably missing it because I can only see out of one eye.

And I have a headache.

Damn, damn, damn...

Seriously, buy that shit online. Just don't tell Spexxvet about it.

10-05-2011, 10:10 PM	#7171
classicman barely disguised asshole, keeper of all that is holy. Join Date: Nov 2007 Posts: 23,401	Wow Ali - thats a lot of bad to deal with all at once. (Hugs) __________________ "like strapping a pillow on a bull in a china shop" Bullitt

10-06-2011, 12:26 AM	#7174
classicman barely disguised asshole, keeper of all that is holy. Join Date: Nov 2007 Posts: 23,401	I agree with Lola - Its all the woman's fault. __________________ "like strapping a pillow on a bull in a china shop" Bullitt

10-06-2011, 01:14 AM	#7175
Aliantha trying hard to be a better person Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Brisbane, Australia Posts: 16,493	Lola, although I appreciate your suggestions, and they may partly be true, this is an ongoing issue which I've begged him to get help with because he's not getting the idea from me. He had an abusive upbringing till he was about 12, after which time his mother basically left him to fend for himself. He's never learned how to care how his actions affect others and he was more or less single till we married 5 yrs ago. By single I mean he'd never really lived with a woman before. His living arrangements were either him by himself or with other bachelors. He just has no idea, and after about 7 years of trying to show him a better way, I'm at my wits end. He needs counselling to deal with what happened to him as a child which is a direct catalyst to the type of behaviour I am trying to deal with now. It's not that I don't love him or feel he doesn't love me. He just doesn't believe the issues are that bad, but they've just about reached breaking point because the kids are picking up his habits, and are starting to believe that's the way it's meant to be, and I'm not going to have that. Anyway, can you tell I'm still pissed off? __________________ Kind words are the music of the world. F. W. Faber

10-06-2011, 01:17 AM	#7176
Aliantha trying hard to be a better person Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Brisbane, Australia Posts: 16,493	Oh, and on top of that, my butthead brother hasn't apologised for his stupid decisions either. I'm surrounded by men who seem to think it's ok to treat me like a fucking idiot mushroom who needs to be fed a constant stream of shit. __________________ Kind words are the music of the world. F. W. Faber

10-06-2011, 07:21 AM	#7178
Aliantha trying hard to be a better person Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Brisbane, Australia Posts: 16,493	Thanks Dana. I think I'll have a nice hot shower then go to bed soon. I'm buggered, and it'll be a big day tomorrow. They're letting my Aunt go home, and I'm the one who's going to be taking her there, so I guess I'll probably be pretty busy with her most of the day. Then some friends are having a party for their 20th wedding anniversary in the evening, and then footy break up party on Saturday. I think I'll need a holiday soon. __________________ Kind words are the music of the world. F. W. Faber

10-06-2011, 11:50 AM	#7179
Gravdigr The Un-Tuckian Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: South Central...KY that is Posts: 39,517	What's Upsetting Me Today? A large, wet, muddy puddle under and around the fire hydrant in my front yard. __________________ These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA, EPA, FBI, DEA, CDC, or FDIC. These statements are not intended to diagnose, cause, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. If you feel you have been harmed/offended by, or, disagree with any of the above statements or images, please feel free to fuck right off.

10-06-2011, 02:26 PM	#7180
Sundae polaroid of perfection Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: West Yorkshire Posts: 24,185	Ali, just try to remember they are not doing this to hurt or upset you. I'm sure both love you. I'm not on a high horse, I'd be talking consideration and manners and all sorts of swear words if I was in that situation. Maybe you & Dazza should consider counselling together. If'n you could ever get him there. It doesn't mean crisis, it doesn't mean imminent break-up, it just means someone to mediate and give you ideas and examples of how to talk to eachother. Re your bro - meh. I can never please my sister. But then she doesn't give a shit about me. I'm only there to be complained about. Being blood does not mean thinking or feeling the same way. It's shitty for you, but at least you have good people in your family so you can get the truth. Hang in there chick. Family (blood or marriage) conflict is the worst, because it leaves you without a safe haven. Hope things get better. __________________ Life's hard you know, so strike a pose on a Cadillac

10-07-2011, 01:43 PM	#7181
Lola Bunny Junior Master Dwellar Join Date: May 2011 Posts: 2,728	Ali: Sorry to hear about your situation. I actually have more to say but being a single person, whatever opinions I have is just superficial and unrealistic to your situation. I hope everything will work out eventually. Btw, I'm glad today is better for you. (Saw your comment from another thread. )

10-07-2011, 02:02 PM	#7182
BrilliantDisguise Master of the Domain Join Date: Oct 2011 Posts: 224	I'm upset because I feel like I'm losing a closeness I have with a friend that means a lot to me.

10-07-2011, 03:14 PM	#7183
SamIam Registered User Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Not here Posts: 2,655	This is so frustrating! This morning I woke up and went to put on my glasses when I discovered that the left lens had fallen out. Huh? I'm sure it was there when I was reading in bed last night. I'd have noticed it was missing because my eye sight is awful. I am legally blind without corrective lenses. My back-up glasses are an old pair that is so scratched up, they are almost worthless. So, I started the search with only one eye. I looked EVERYWHERE - under the bed, beside the bed. I shook out all the bed clothes - nothing. I got out the broom and swept under the bed - nothing except a few dust balls. I checked the hamper in my bedroom, shaking everything out - nothing. I have gone over my bedroom three times now - nothing. That lens has got to be there, but its not. It will cost me two or three hundred dollars to order a replacement lens. I don't have two or three hundred dollars. And I bet as soon as I go down and order it (assuming I can scrape the money up), the damn lens will turn up somewhere. I'm probably missing it because I can only see out of one eye. And I have a headache. Damn, damn, damn...

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