10-26-2007, 05:29 AM | #796 |
Doctor Wtf
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Location: Badelaide, Baustralia
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10-26-2007, 05:34 AM | #797 |
trying hard to be a better person
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Location: Brisbane, Australia
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Lots of men compensate by imagining things that are just never going to happen. It appears that you're no exception.
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Kind words are the music of the world. F. W. Faber |
10-26-2007, 05:43 AM | #798 |
Doctor Wtf
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10-26-2007, 05:53 AM | #799 |
trying hard to be a better person
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Location: Brisbane, Australia
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no, they're not very different at all. In fact, I can explain the whole plot of any one of them to you right now.
Did you know that all the authors have a formula that they have to follow?
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Kind words are the music of the world. F. W. Faber |
10-26-2007, 05:58 AM | #800 | |
Doctor Wtf
Join Date: Oct 2007
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Quote:
Not that M&B are all much the same. I think you may have had enough wine now, ma'am.
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Shut up and hug. MoreThanPretty, Nov 5, 2008. Just because I'm nominally polite, does not make me a pussy. Sundae Girl. |
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10-26-2007, 06:10 AM | #801 |
trying hard to be a better person
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yes I know that's what you were doing, and I was just agreeing with you.
god you're annoying. lol
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Kind words are the music of the world. F. W. Faber |
10-26-2007, 06:20 AM | #802 | |
Doctor Wtf
Join Date: Oct 2007
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Quote:
so, back on thread ... I'm what's upsetting you today, huh?
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Shut up and hug. MoreThanPretty, Nov 5, 2008. Just because I'm nominally polite, does not make me a pussy. Sundae Girl. |
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10-26-2007, 06:24 AM | #803 |
trying hard to be a better person
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Brisbane, Australia
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No, you haven't annoyed me that much. I wouldn't say you're 'infuriating' which is a prerequisit for a M&B romance. Hubby probably wont mind too much since you live in another country.
You're entertaining me today. I probably should talk to you in another thread.
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Kind words are the music of the world. F. W. Faber |
10-27-2007, 07:42 AM | #804 |
We have to go back, Kate!
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Yorkshire
Posts: 25,964
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*sighs* The two Js have fallen out. Had a screaming row and are both now upset. He's been prickly as an old army blanket just lately and picking fights with everyone. I can see him sabotaging good friendships and a good relationship and it really upsets me. I know him better than anybody else, but that means I also know it's pointless trying to get him to see what he's doing. He is absolutely adamant that the aggression, or hostility, or lack of respect etc comes from them first. Any attempt to calm him down and get him to see that his good friend hasn't just started raising their voice at him out the blue for no reason, just makes him feel that you are taking their side, and are just not seeing what he's had to put up with. Cannot see his part in provoking those reactions in people, goes off feeling like the whole world's against him, and that now even his friends don't like him...*heavy sigh* which is of course not true.
Had a text convo with her and haven't spoken to him yet. She clearly understands where he's coming from, but that doesn't make it any easier at the time the row erupts. Having lived with him for 12 years I know the patterns of those rows. She tells me her side of it it's like hearing myself talking to mum back in my 20s. Want to hug her. Want to hug and slap him. |
10-27-2007, 01:43 PM | #805 |
polaroid of perfection
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: West Yorkshire
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It's worth a try...
Ah well, perhaps it's all for the best. You can't stop other people from making their own mistakes anyway.
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Life's hard you know, so strike a pose on a Cadillac |
10-27-2007, 01:54 PM | #806 |
We have to go back, Kate!
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Yorkshire
Posts: 25,964
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(male) J is spiralling down. I don't know how far he'll go. He walked out on her today after picking a further fight. She knows what it's about, as do I. Something from his past he thought he had finished dealing with has reared its head. Complicated, family stuff. Ihaven't seen him like this for....god nine years maybe? It isn't like when we were splitting up, this is a deeper, much older pain.
He won't talk to her about it. Said there's no point, left her in a state and went home. he is trying to deal with it I know, by removing himself from everybody that matters so he can't hurt them whilst he is getting to grips with his issues. Damnit, he'd got away from this. Found a way he could reconcile himself to the past. Now he's fucking back in that place again. Breaks my heart. Breaks my heart to hear my friend Female J, so wildly upset she is hyperventilating, and can't actually talk when she's phoned me. I talked her down. I think. She knows what he's dealing with. Butthe whole thing sets off nasty resonances with an old relationship and the hurts she suffered there. They'll sort it out. But I hate knowing that she's heartbroken and he's in hell. |
10-27-2007, 02:58 PM | #807 |
Looking forward to open mic night.
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: New Mexico
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Wow Dana...Is this your ex-husband?
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Show me a sane man, and I will cure him for you.- Carl Jung |
10-27-2007, 03:37 PM | #808 |
We have to go back, Kate!
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Yorkshire
Posts: 25,964
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Ex-partner. We're the same age and we lived together from 18 - 30. He is my oldest and dearest friend. His girlfriend is my closest female friend.
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10-27-2007, 05:34 PM | #809 | |
Looking forward to open mic night.
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: New Mexico
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Quote:
Just don't let her (female J) think that anything about it is her fault, or the cycle continues. She probably didn't even trigger it. No sense in creating new ghosts while just trying to let go of the old. Well...I'm going to try and keep it in mind myself. The going is about to get tough.
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Show me a sane man, and I will cure him for you.- Carl Jung |
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10-27-2007, 06:54 PM | #810 |
We have to go back, Kate!
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Yorkshire
Posts: 25,964
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*nods* that's pretty much been my tack.
Thing is...I used to be the one dealing with that and this has sent me back to places I didn't want to be. Fuck. Fuck this feeling of utter helplessness in the face of his overwhelming pain. |
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