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#946 |
UNDER CONDITIONAL MITIGATION
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Austin, TX
Posts: 20,012
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I am a mean mommy.
Minifob jumps out of bed at 6:00 am sharp everyday, regardless of how tired he is. He could easily go back to sleep for another hour or more, but it's become an obsession--he says his favorite number is six and is brought to tears at the suggestion that we might ask him to stay in bed longer. The holiday schedule has resulted in even less sleep than usual, plus we're both sick. We could certainly stand to sleep in past dawn. So before saying goodnight, I stealthily set his bedroom clock back an hour. Sucker. |
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#947 |
LONG LIVE KING ZIPPY! per Feetz
Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Arkansas
Posts: 7,661
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where the hell is that like button !!!
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"Success is getting what you want. Happiness is wanting what you get. " Brother Dave Gardner |
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#949 |
still says videotape
Join Date: Feb 2001
Posts: 26,813
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Ha! Well played.
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If you would only recognize that life is hard, things would be so much easier for you. - Louis D. Brandeis |
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#950 | |
To shreds, you say?
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: in the house and on the street-how many, many feet we meet!
Posts: 18,449
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Quote:
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The internet is a hateful stew of vomit you can never take completely seriously. - Her Fobs |
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#951 |
Turns out my CRS is a symptom of TMB.
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Chicago suburbs
Posts: 2,916
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[Jurassic Park]Clever Girl[/Jurassic Park]
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#952 |
Back in 10
Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 3,684
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A girls gotta do what a girls gotta do
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Speaking simply... do not confuse this with having a simple mind. |
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#953 |
UNDER CONDITIONAL MITIGATION
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Austin, TX
Posts: 20,012
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More amusement: We've discovered that our new oven has a "Sabbath mode."
For those not aware, there's this small, strange overlap of people who feel they must strictly observe the Jewish rule of "no work" on the Sabbath, and yet are too modern to give up any of the stuff they like to do on Saturdays that doesn't involve contemplating God in one's home all day. So you get weird rationalizations like, "you can ride in an elevator, but you can't push the buttons," such that elevators in "Sabbath mode" will automatically stop on every floor. When Sabbath mode is engaged, the oven basically stays on for 12 hours, with the interior light and digital display functions disabled. Like the elevator, you can put stuff in it, and if it happens to be hot and cook your food, well, God will understand that you were an unwitting bystander to the work that your gentile appliance was doing. Better hope the local firefighters don't observe the Sabbath when you accidentally set your kitchen on fire. |
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#954 | |
Turns out my CRS is a symptom of TMB.
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Chicago suburbs
Posts: 2,916
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Quote:
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#955 |
Slattern of the Swail
Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 15,654
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:gentile appliance:
and :Black Sabbath mode: are both wins.
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In Barrie's play and novel, the roles of fairies are brief: they are allies to the Lost Boys, the source of fairy dust and ...They are portrayed as dangerous, whimsical and extremely clever but quite hedonistic. "Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked and, jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her. —James Barrie Wimminfolk they be tricksy. - ZenGum |
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#956 |
Glutton for Gluttony
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Tampa, FL
Posts: 1,409
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Two sales people came to my door today and tried to sell me salad.
Cookies, water softeners, yard services, carpet cleaning... but salad? |
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#957 |
Doctor Wtf
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Badelaide, Baustralia
Posts: 12,861
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Uhh, as in green salad?
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Shut up and hug. MoreThanPretty, Nov 5, 2008. Just because I'm nominally polite, does not make me a pussy. Sundae Girl. |
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#958 |
Glutton for Gluttony
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Tampa, FL
Posts: 1,409
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As in, "All you need is a big bowl and we will prepare for you a fresh and delicious salad!" Then they handed me a flyer with information about the health benefits of foods like spinach and zucchini.
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#959 |
Person who doesn't update the user title
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 13,002
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Ahhh, don't fall for it. That's the lesser known Big Bowl Scam. They steal these big bowls from people and use them to make stools for the kids in China to stand on so they can reach the manufacturing line. You get a nice fresh salad, sure, but all the Chinese kids get is hard labor.
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#960 |
Slattern of the Swail
Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 15,654
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dat's funny, monkey.
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In Barrie's play and novel, the roles of fairies are brief: they are allies to the Lost Boys, the source of fairy dust and ...They are portrayed as dangerous, whimsical and extremely clever but quite hedonistic. "Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked and, jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her. —James Barrie Wimminfolk they be tricksy. - ZenGum |
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