My wife went off on my Mom

Madman · 05-19-2009, 09:21 AM

Wow! It was pretty wild!

I knew something was up because for the last 2-3 weeks my wife has really been getting down on my Mom. Calling her "stinky lady" and telling me she can't stand her and stuff like that.

Just some history...

She moved in with us just over four years ago. My wife and I talked about it at length and we both agree it would be okay. I especially wanted to make sure my wife was "really" okay with this - she assured me she was.

Current...

Everything really went well for years - until recently. I came home and we were sitting (my wife and I) on the back patio having some coffee and she just started complaining about my mom. So I asked her what she would like me to do and she responded with she didn't know. We talked a little bit and I finally told her that I would have my mom move out.

She finally said she just couldn't stand her anymore and that she makes her skin crawl. I actually started laughing at that and my wife didn't appreciate it. She stormed into the house, went into the bedroom, grabbed a bag (must've already been packed) and stomped down the stairs. Then I heard a "thud" and a scream. I went over to look and my wife is on the floor holding her knee. So I went down to her and starting checking her out. Then my mom comes over to the steps and asks what happened - I just told her she missed a step. I then told my mom that we have to talk.

So, I left my wife on the floor holding her knee (smart huh?) and I went into my moms room and told her that it would probably be a good idea if she got her own place. After a short discussion she agreed it would be best.

I went back to my wife, picked her up, loaded her in the car and brought her to the emergency room to have her knee checked out. She's okay - turned out to be a strain. She was on crutches for a day and a half. She limps a little but she'll be good as new for the Willie Nelson concert.

Anyway, I got my mom all set up for an apartment now, everything's ready to go - just waiting for this Saturday to move her in.

It got pretty crazy here for a bit. This really snuck up and bit me in the ass - I really didn't even have one iota of a clue there was any feeling of hostility or animosity between them until recently (except for my wife's complaining that started just a couple weeks before). Other than that... nothing. Weird!

Anyway, the problem has been taken care of. Honestly, I kind of like the idea of having the house to my wife and I. I've always wanted to do it on the... well, it's a thought... or a dream...

I kinda wonder what it is between wives and mother-in-laws? There seems to be this thing where the mom thinks her son should cater to her and the wife... well... that's obvious (I didn't marry my mother).

All I have to do now is make sure they don't beat each other up before Saturday.

Oh... The "straw that broke the camels back." Mothers Day! My mother "told" my wife that I was going to take her and a friend to Church. That didn't go over to well with my wife. She (my wife) must've said something then because I didn't hear about it until later.

glatt · 05-19-2009, 09:28 AM

No wonder you're a madman. Mother and wife under one roof?

Pie · 05-19-2009, 09:36 AM

Doesn't have to be mother-in-law; the wife's own mother can also be sufficient to make one a MadMan.

Madman · 05-19-2009, 10:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by glatt

No wonder you're a madman. Mother and wife under one roof?

I work... a lot.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pie

Doesn't have to be mother-in-law; the wife's own mother can also be sufficient to make one a MadMan.

That's another story...

...for the Sci-Fi channel.

05-19-2009, 10:31 AM

My mom lived with us for three months once. I was on the verge of abandoning my family by the time she moved out.

TheMercenary · 05-19-2009, 10:41 AM

My MIL lived with us for about 3 or 4 weeks and my kids wanted to move out. She drove me crazy but I just put up with it. Eventually she began to drive my wife crazy and it was at that point that I realized the effort to find her some place to live would be accelerated. Tough situation for sure.

morethanpretty · 05-19-2009, 11:21 AM

I would think it would be best to leave mom's and MIL's out of the equation. I know that there are situations where it just can't be helped. Such a living situation should be short-term if at all possible. So unless there was a medical or other serious reason why a mom can't live on her own, I would definately already be planning on her moving out, before she even moved in with me and my partner. Now if I'm single, my parents are of course welcome to stay with me for a prolonged period, until they start causing too much trouble. I can't be too harsh about that, seeing as how I'm an adult living with them.

Shawnee123 · 05-19-2009, 12:35 PM

I thought this thread was "my wife went off WITH my mom" and thought we had a Lifetime Lesbian Movie of the Week opportunity.

Madman · 05-19-2009, 01:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by morethanpretty

I would think it would be best to leave mom's and MIL's out of the equation. I know that there are situations where it just can't be helped. Such a living situation should be short-term if at all possible. So unless there was a medical or other serious reason why a mom can't live on her own, I would definately already be planning on her moving out, before she even moved in with me and my partner. Now if I'm single, my parents are of course welcome to stay with me for a prolonged period, until they start causing too much trouble. I can't be too harsh about that, seeing as how I'm an adult living with them.

There were some extenuating circumstances, still are; but nothing that can't be handled at a distance. She never did meddle in things, but she (my mom) did have a tendency to "ignore" or "not care" about "my" family. It was more about her and her friends. I just let it go and probably shouldn't have. I believe things will work out better in the long run doing it this way. I know I'll like it better.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shawnee123

I thought this thread was "my wife went off WITH my mom" and thought we had a Lifetime Lesbian Movie of the Week opportunity.

Sorry to disappoint you Shawnee. But, if you're interested... My mom IS single.

BigV · 05-19-2009, 01:32 PM

(I've heard that) the Chinese ideogram for "trouble" or "war" is represented by "two women under one roof". If it isn't, it should be.

My Mom came to live with us for a while after my Dad died. Tink was very generous and gracious. She did the right thing by agreeing and cooperating with the whole affair. I'm very thankful she did--I had much on my emotional plate at the time, and Tink took good care of my Mom.

Still, it was an eternity, those few months. And I believe it left permanent scars on our marriage. If I had it to do over again, I would just work out the ending right at the beginning, skipping the whole "living with us for a while" part, and move directly to "moving Mom into her new place". ASAP or faster.

kerosene · 05-19-2009, 01:39 PM

Letting MIL live at my house is not an option. These days, I have considered banning visits, too.

Shawnee123 · 05-19-2009, 01:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Madman

Sorry to disappoint you Shawnee. But, if you're interested... My mom IS single.

No thanks. It don't mean a thing if it ain't got that SCHWINGGGGG...

Juniper · 05-19-2009, 02:02 PM

My mom's mother lived with us the entire time I was growing up.

She and my father did not get along at all. He must've had the patience of a saint. Actually he had his own escape den in the basement - fridge, bar, beer, TV, girlie mags, etc...I'm sure that helped. But it sure didn't do my parents' marriage any good.

And honestly I don't think it did any of us any good. Though it seemed like an ideal plan - Grandma did the cooking, cleaning, laundry, took care of me when I was little, she was a bitterly unhappy woman and made sure everyone knew it and shared her pain. I still bear the scars.

Now, when my mom first started getting sick a few years ago we started making plans to move her in here with us. She was, understandably, adamantly opposed to it. We decided it would only work if she had her own separate apartment and planned to build her one, figuring that later on after she passed away it could be an office, studio, or house one of our kids that needed some extra space. It was to have its own full bath, kitchenette, etc.

And I suppose I'd provide the built-in maid service. And cook for her because she didn't cook well. And...well, you know. It didn't happen because she got sicker more quickly than we expected. But I sure would've given it a shot. She was worth it. And unlike my Grandma, my husband and my mom did get along. Mostly.

glatt · 05-19-2009, 02:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Juniper

And unlike my Grandma, my husband and my mom did get along. Mostly.

They got along when they weren't under the same roof anyway.

My MIL stayed with us for two weeks after my daughter was born. It was very nice of her and she was a big help, but I hated it. I was thrilled when she left.

Sheldonrs · 05-19-2009, 02:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shawnee123

No thanks. It don't mean a thing if it ain't got that SCHWINGGGGG...

aMEN!!!

05-19-2009, 09:21 AM	#1
Madman has left the building. Join Date: Aug 2006 Posts: 455	My wife went off on my Mom Wow! It was pretty wild! I knew something was up because for the last 2-3 weeks my wife has really been getting down on my Mom. Calling her "stinky lady" and telling me she can't stand her and stuff like that. Just some history... She moved in with us just over four years ago. My wife and I talked about it at length and we both agree it would be okay. I especially wanted to make sure my wife was "really" okay with this - she assured me she was. Current... Everything really went well for years - until recently. I came home and we were sitting (my wife and I) on the back patio having some coffee and she just started complaining about my mom. So I asked her what she would like me to do and she responded with she didn't know. We talked a little bit and I finally told her that I would have my mom move out. She finally said she just couldn't stand her anymore and that she makes her skin crawl. I actually started laughing at that and my wife didn't appreciate it. She stormed into the house, went into the bedroom, grabbed a bag (must've already been packed) and stomped down the stairs. Then I heard a "thud" and a scream. I went over to look and my wife is on the floor holding her knee. So I went down to her and starting checking her out. Then my mom comes over to the steps and asks what happened - I just told her she missed a step. I then told my mom that we have to talk. So, I left my wife on the floor holding her knee (smart huh?) and I went into my moms room and told her that it would probably be a good idea if she got her own place. After a short discussion she agreed it would be best. I went back to my wife, picked her up, loaded her in the car and brought her to the emergency room to have her knee checked out. She's okay - turned out to be a strain. She was on crutches for a day and a half. She limps a little but she'll be good as new for the Willie Nelson concert. Anyway, I got my mom all set up for an apartment now, everything's ready to go - just waiting for this Saturday to move her in. It got pretty crazy here for a bit. This really snuck up and bit me in the ass - I really didn't even have one iota of a clue there was any feeling of hostility or animosity between them until recently (except for my wife's complaining that started just a couple weeks before). Other than that... nothing. Weird! Anyway, the problem has been taken care of. Honestly, I kind of like the idea of having the house to my wife and I. I've always wanted to do it on the... well, it's a thought... or a dream... I kinda wonder what it is between wives and mother-in-laws? There seems to be this thing where the mom thinks her son should cater to her and the wife... well... that's obvious (I didn't marry my mother). All I have to do now is make sure they don't beat each other up before Saturday. Oh... The "straw that broke the camels back." Mothers Day! My mother "told" my wife that I was going to take her and a friend to Church. That didn't go over to well with my wife. She (my wife) must've said something then because I didn't hear about it until later.

05-19-2009, 09:36 AM	#3
Pie Gone and done Join Date: Sep 2001 Posts: 4,808	Doesn't have to be mother-in-law; the wife's own mother can also be sufficient to make one a MadMan. __________________ per·son \ˈpər-sən\ (noun) - an ephemeral collection of small, irrational decisions The fun thing about evolution (and science in general) is that it happens whether you believe in it or not.

05-19-2009, 10:41 AM	#6
TheMercenary “Hypocrisy: prejudice with a halo” Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Savannah, Georgia Posts: 21,393	My MIL lived with us for about 3 or 4 weeks and my kids wanted to move out. She drove me crazy but I just put up with it. Eventually she began to drive my wife crazy and it was at that point that I realized the effort to find her some place to live would be accelerated. Tough situation for sure. __________________ Anyone but the this most fuked up President in History in 2012!

05-19-2009, 11:21 AM	#7
morethanpretty Thats "Miss Zipper Neck" to you. Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: little town (but not the littlest) in texas Posts: 2,957	I would think it would be best to leave mom's and MIL's out of the equation. I know that there are situations where it just can't be helped. Such a living situation should be short-term if at all possible. So unless there was a medical or other serious reason why a mom can't live on her own, I would definately already be planning on her moving out, before she even moved in with me and my partner. Now if I'm single, my parents are of course welcome to stay with me for a prolonged period, until they start causing too much trouble. I can't be too harsh about that, seeing as how I'm an adult living with them. __________________ Addicts may suck dick for coke, but love came up with the idea to put a dick in there to begin with. -Jack O'Brien

05-19-2009, 12:35 PM	#8
Shawnee123 Why, you're a regular Alfred E Einstein, ain't ya? Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 21,206	I thought this thread was "my wife went off WITH my mom" and thought we had a Lifetime Lesbian Movie of the Week opportunity. __________________ A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones who need the advice. --Bill Cosby

05-19-2009, 09:28 AM	#2
glatt ™ Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Arlington, VA Posts: 27,717	No wonder you're a madman. Mother and wife under one roof?

05-19-2009, 10:31 AM	#5
Tiki Guest Posts: n/a	My mom lived with us for three months once. I was on the verge of abandoning my family by the time she moved out.

05-19-2009, 01:32 PM	#10
BigV Goon Squad Leader Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Seattle Posts: 27,063	(I've heard that) the Chinese ideogram for "trouble" or "war" is represented by "two women under one roof". If it isn't, it should be. My Mom came to live with us for a while after my Dad died. Tink was very generous and gracious. She did the right thing by agreeing and cooperating with the whole affair. I'm very thankful she did--I had much on my emotional plate at the time, and Tink took good care of my Mom. Still, it was an eternity, those few months. And I believe it left permanent scars on our marriage. If I had it to do over again, I would just work out the ending right at the beginning, skipping the whole "living with us for a while" part, and move directly to "moving Mom into her new place". ASAP or faster. __________________ Be Just and Fear Not.

05-19-2009, 01:39 PM	#11
kerosene Touring the facilities Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: The plains of Colorado Posts: 3,476	Letting MIL live at my house is not an option. These days, I have considered banning visits, too.

05-19-2009, 02:02 PM	#13
Juniper I know, right? Join Date: Aug 2008 Posts: 1,539	My mom's mother lived with us the entire time I was growing up. She and my father did not get along at all. He must've had the patience of a saint. Actually he had his own escape den in the basement - fridge, bar, beer, TV, girlie mags, etc...I'm sure that helped. But it sure didn't do my parents' marriage any good. And honestly I don't think it did any of us any good. Though it seemed like an ideal plan - Grandma did the cooking, cleaning, laundry, took care of me when I was little, she was a bitterly unhappy woman and made sure everyone knew it and shared her pain. I still bear the scars. Now, when my mom first started getting sick a few years ago we started making plans to move her in here with us. She was, understandably, adamantly opposed to it. We decided it would only work if she had her own separate apartment and planned to build her one, figuring that later on after she passed away it could be an office, studio, or house one of our kids that needed some extra space. It was to have its own full bath, kitchenette, etc. And I suppose I'd provide the built-in maid service. And cook for her because she didn't cook well. And...well, you know. It didn't happen because she got sicker more quickly than we expected. But I sure would've given it a shot. She was worth it. And unlike my Grandma, my husband and my mom did get along. Mostly.

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