Why does Spiderman hate Christmas?

Trilby · 12-10-2009, 10:23 AM

My kitteh, Spiderman, is destroying my Christmas tree. Every morning she climbs it and bats at precious and rare ornaments gotten in magical and exotic places like Gatlinburg and Chautauqua and Frankenmuth. I'll NEVER get back to those places and these are genuine GLASS ornaments we're talking here!

Instead of punishing her I am going to attempt to FIGURE OUT HER MINDSET and why she hates the birthday of Baby Jebus.

It could be that she's a heathen - but I thought heathens were cool with other gods? your advice, as always, is welcome.

Spexxvet · 12-10-2009, 10:27 AM

I do the same thing. My reason? It's fun. Try distracting Spidey with liquor and sex.

skysidhe · 12-10-2009, 10:28 AM

When I got my kittens I just didn't put up my ornaments.
(Put the rare ones on display in a safe place and just leave the lights on the tree plain? with maybe some wood bead garland or something?)
It was much easier than learning kitty speak.

xoxoxoBruce · 12-10-2009, 10:29 AM

Hello... it's a cat, that's how they roll. Nothing left unmolested, is their motto, creed, and life long quest.

Trilby · 12-10-2009, 10:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by xoxoxoBruce

.. Nothing left unmolested, is their motto, creed, and life long quest.

also the creed of the Hell's Angels.

interesting. maybe spidey is a biker..?

wolf · 12-10-2009, 11:51 AM

So, she hasn't shoved the tree over yet? You're lucky.

Trilby · 12-10-2009, 11:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by wolf

So, she hasn't shoved the tree over yet? You're lucky.

She's still quite little - only weighs a few ounces!

well, maybe a pound.

skysidhe · 12-10-2009, 11:55 AM

wow a pound...how cute. The perfect size for tree climbing.

classicman · 12-10-2009, 12:55 PM

yeh - After a few episodes years ago...My tree is now firmly secured to the wall. I have a herd at my house. You gotta see it from her perspective - all those flashy bright shiny things . . . MUST TOUCH!

I put the better ones up outta reach and got some cheaper plastic ones for the bottom - no harm there.

Juniper · 12-10-2009, 01:34 PM

Maybe she's pissed at you for naming HER after a MALE comic book creature. Jeez, cats have dignity after all!

But seriously, I would not DREAM of putting glass ornaments on a tree with a cat in the house. And since we've always had cats, we have zero glass ornaments.

Or glass drinking glasses, or anything else breakable in the house, for that matter. We do have a few, though, and GUESS WHAT? One of the cats broke a glass last night while we were sleeping! Some fool left it sitting on the coffee table.

Anyway . . . hubby's and my first Christmas together we had two really wild kittens. They knocked the tree over multiple times, till we finally TIED it to the ceiling (drop ceiling w/tracks) and adjacent curtain rod. That worked, but they still tried their best and it looked really wonky after a couple days.

Good luck.

Sundae · 12-10-2009, 02:07 PM

Diz thinks everything in the world is a cat-toy.
And everything I do is for his entertainment.

If you really want to traib your cat, your best bet is an eagle eye (metaphor) and a water pistol within reach. Shoot your kitteh every time she transgresses and she will learn it's not worth it.

Personally, I'd just put the precious things on display somewhere more secure. Good luck.

jinx · 12-10-2009, 02:20 PM

When the kids were little, we kept the glass ornaments towards the top of the tree. I've never made concessions for the cats though, I mean really, just tell them "no".

Trilby · 12-10-2009, 02:43 PM

She's named Spiderman because she is very progressive - she is not stuck in any one gender role. She feels free to explore her masculine side, as it 'twere.

I will just take the glass ornaments off now -- she is able to climb to the very tip top of the tree. I feel very mean-y if I squirt her with a water bottle. She IS an orphan, after all. No mommy! (that's why she sucks on my earlobe)

Just a funny little kitteh.

dar512 · 12-10-2009, 03:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Brianna

I feel very mean-y if I squirt her with a water bottle.

Tough love, baby. Remember she won't be 1lb forever.

SamIam · 12-10-2009, 03:11 PM

Well, Flicker, my kitty at large, has been pretty good at leaving the tree alone. Even a month ago this would have been impossible. I use an industrial size plant mister. What with all those baptisms, Flicker and the Christ child have adopted an uneasy truce.

The main problem stems from the era thousands of eons ago when cats were worshiped as gods. You can inagine what a come-down that must have been. One day eating the equivlent of Tinbuktu Fancy Feast, and the nexr fighting rats the size of small children over the leavings at the city dump.

You can see where cats are pissed off big time. If the only thng they do is break a few baubles, you are fortunate. Did I tell you about the 5 cats that ate a mother, father, 3 children, and Uncle Barnie for dinner?

12-10-2009, 10:23 AM	#1
Trilby Slattern of the Swail Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 15,654	Why does Spiderman hate Christmas? My kitteh, Spiderman, is destroying my Christmas tree. Every morning she climbs it and bats at precious and rare ornaments gotten in magical and exotic places like Gatlinburg and Chautauqua and Frankenmuth. I'll NEVER get back to those places and these are genuine GLASS ornaments we're talking here! Instead of punishing her I am going to attempt to FIGURE OUT HER MINDSET and why she hates the birthday of Baby Jebus. It could be that she's a heathen - but I thought heathens were cool with other gods? your advice, as always, is welcome. __________________ In Barrie's play and novel, the roles of fairies are brief: they are allies to the Lost Boys, the source of fairy dust and ...They are portrayed as dangerous, whimsical and extremely clever but quite hedonistic. "Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked and, jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her. —James Barrie Wimminfolk they be tricksy. - ZenGum

12-10-2009, 10:27 AM	#2
Spexxvet Makes some feel uncomfortable Join Date: Dec 2005 Posts: 10,346	I do the same thing. My reason? It's fun. Try distracting Spidey with liquor and sex. __________________ "I'm certainly free, nay compelled, to spread the gospel of Spex. " - xoxoxoBruce

12-10-2009, 10:29 AM	#4
xoxoxoBruce The future is unwritten Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 71,105	Hello... it's a cat, that's how they roll. Nothing left unmolested, is their motto, creed, and life long quest. __________________ The descent of man ~ Nixon, Friedman, Reagan, Trump.

12-10-2009, 11:51 AM	#6
wolf lobber of scimitars Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Phila Burbs Posts: 20,774	So, she hasn't shoved the tree over yet? You're lucky. __________________ wolf eht htiw og "Conspiracies are the norm, not the exception." --G. Edward Griffin The Creature from Jekyll Island High Priestess of the Church of the Whale Penis

12-10-2009, 12:55 PM	#9
classicman barely disguised asshole, keeper of all that is holy. Join Date: Nov 2007 Posts: 23,401	yeh - After a few episodes years ago...My tree is now firmly secured to the wall. I have a herd at my house. You gotta see it from her perspective - all those flashy bright shiny things . . . MUST TOUCH! I put the better ones up outta reach and got some cheaper plastic ones for the bottom - no harm there. __________________ "like strapping a pillow on a bull in a china shop" Bullitt

12-10-2009, 10:28 AM	#3
skysidhe ~~Life is either a daring adventure or nothing.~~ Join Date: Apr 2006 Posts: 6,828	When I got my kittens I just didn't put up my ornaments. (Put the rare ones on display in a safe place and just leave the lights on the tree plain? with maybe some wood bead garland or something?) It was much easier than learning kitty speak.

12-10-2009, 11:55 AM	#8
skysidhe ~~Life is either a daring adventure or nothing.~~ Join Date: Apr 2006 Posts: 6,828	wow a pound...how cute. The perfect size for tree climbing.

12-10-2009, 01:34 PM	#10
Juniper I know, right? Join Date: Aug 2008 Posts: 1,539	Maybe she's pissed at you for naming HER after a MALE comic book creature. Jeez, cats have dignity after all! But seriously, I would not DREAM of putting glass ornaments on a tree with a cat in the house. And since we've always had cats, we have zero glass ornaments. Or glass drinking glasses, or anything else breakable in the house, for that matter. We do have a few, though, and GUESS WHAT? One of the cats broke a glass last night while we were sleeping! Some fool left it sitting on the coffee table. Anyway . . . hubby's and my first Christmas together we had two really wild kittens. They knocked the tree over multiple times, till we finally TIED it to the ceiling (drop ceiling w/tracks) and adjacent curtain rod. That worked, but they still tried their best and it looked really wonky after a couple days. Good luck.

12-10-2009, 02:07 PM	#11
Sundae polaroid of perfection Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: West Yorkshire Posts: 24,185	Diz thinks everything in the world is a cat-toy. And everything I do is for his entertainment. If you really want to traib your cat, your best bet is an eagle eye (metaphor) and a water pistol within reach. Shoot your kitteh every time she transgresses and she will learn it's not worth it. Personally, I'd just put the precious things on display somewhere more secure. Good luck. __________________ Life's hard you know, so strike a pose on a Cadillac

12-10-2009, 02:20 PM	#12
jinx Come on, cat. Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: general vicinity of Philadelphia area Posts: 7,013	When the kids were little, we kept the glass ornaments towards the top of the tree. I've never made concessions for the cats though, I mean really, just tell them "no". __________________ Crying won't help you, praying won't do you no good.

12-10-2009, 02:43 PM	#13
Trilby Slattern of the Swail Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 15,654	She's named Spiderman because she is very progressive - she is not stuck in any one gender role. She feels free to explore her masculine side, as it 'twere. I will just take the glass ornaments off now -- she is able to climb to the very tip top of the tree. I feel very mean-y if I squirt her with a water bottle. She IS an orphan, after all. No mommy! (that's why she sucks on my earlobe) Just a funny little kitteh. __________________ In Barrie's play and novel, the roles of fairies are brief: they are allies to the Lost Boys, the source of fairy dust and ...They are portrayed as dangerous, whimsical and extremely clever but quite hedonistic. "Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked and, jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her. —James Barrie Wimminfolk they be tricksy. - ZenGum

12-10-2009, 03:11 PM	#15
SamIam Registered User Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: Not here Posts: 2,655	Well, Flicker, my kitty at large, has been pretty good at leaving the tree alone. Even a month ago this would have been impossible. I use an industrial size plant mister. What with all those baptisms, Flicker and the Christ child have adopted an uneasy truce. The main problem stems from the era thousands of eons ago when cats were worshiped as gods. You can inagine what a come-down that must have been. One day eating the equivlent of Tinbuktu Fancy Feast, and the nexr fighting rats the size of small children over the leavings at the city dump. You can see where cats are pissed off big time. If the only thng they do is break a few baubles, you are fortunate. Did I tell you about the 5 cats that ate a mother, father, 3 children, and Uncle Barnie for dinner?

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