Potty trained child retreating...

lookout123 · 04-25-2005, 04:17 PM

OK, so my son - the extremely strongwilled one from the other thread? He's got a little issue and I'm having a hard time dealing with it effectively.

He will be 4 in June and has been 100% potty trained since he was 20 months. No accidents in all that time. When it comes to his body he is a clean freak, just like me. until now.

He is having a little problem peeing in his pants. It has happened once a day for going on 2 weeks now. He doesn't go much - in fact, if he wasn't so horrified with the little bit of wetness there i wouldn't even bother to change his undies because it is so little. He will be sitting in the middle of the room and then get this panicked look on his face and run to the bathroom, but it is too late. When we talk about it he says that he was playing, or drawing, or whatever and it just snuck up on him. He isn't doing it on purpose or to make a point - he just gets too wrapped up in what he's doing until it is too late.

Has anyone run into this before? Is it normal? or might he have a little bladder infection that causes this? any ideas on how to get him to pay more attention?

the boy is horrified and embarrassed about it. my wife asks me about it and i'm clueless. i don't have any other kids and i'm almost 31 so i haven't peed my own pants for at least a month or two, so i don't know exactly what is happening here.

glatt · 04-25-2005, 04:33 PM

If he's been trained for about two years, then you might want to call the pediatrician's office and just ask them over the phone. They probably have a nurse you can talk to about it. It very well could be something medical like an infection. We have had occasional accidents with both of ours just in the few weeks after they were trained. They get distracted by playing and just don't pay attention until it's too late. It could be similar for your son, but sounds unlikely. He's been doing it right for so long.

Good luck!

perth · 04-25-2005, 04:36 PM

I have the exact same problem right now. In my case, I believe it has a lot to do with the fact that I'm finally dating again, and so he doesn't have my complete and undivided attention anymore. He always feels terrible, and it makes me feel bad, but I figure the best I can do is to make sure he has as much attention and fun with daddy as possible. This started a little over a week ago, and it's already gotten better, but the accidents are very upsetting to the both of us.

Has he had any unexpected changes in his life recently?

lookout123 · 04-25-2005, 04:39 PM

nothing has changed around our house. my wife and i haven't changed work schedules, no disruption in the marriage. it is just completely out of the blue, and i'm stumped.

kerosene · 04-25-2005, 04:43 PM

Lookout, he could be feeling a little insecure right now. I think toddlers can be that way without unusual circumstances. He might be going through a stage where he feels he really needs extra attention, so he dramatizes this situation. I dunno though. I think it would be a good idea to check with a doctor, in case of a bladder infection or something. Does it hurt him at all?

lookout123 · 04-25-2005, 05:01 PM

no he says it doesn't hurt him at all. i suppose it could be insecurity. i don't know what would have triggered it, but anything is possible.

Clodfobble · 04-25-2005, 08:52 PM

My stepdaughter went through the exact same thing, right around 4 and a half she started having accidents because she would ignore the urge in favor of playing until it was too late. She had repeated accidents over a period of a month or two (though not as frequent as your boy, maybe once every 2-3 days) and was horrified as well.

She mostly just got over it on her own, but we tried to help, while at the same time limiting the embarassment for her, by keeping track of how engrossed she was in something--not necessarily how long it had been since she last went to the bathroom--and breaking the reverie by casually announcing that one of us was going to go use the restroom. Usually that reminded her that she needed to go, without our having to directly ask her.

mrnoodle · 04-28-2005, 12:17 PM

I was pretty insecure when I started kindergarten (I wasn't very well socialized, except for with two neighbor kids). I was afraid to ask the teacher to go to the bathroom, and shit myself. I also peed my pants in the waiting room of the doctor's office one morning. It was about a 3 month thing, happened maybe 4 times total.

Come to think, it was right around the time my little brother was about to be born. That could've caused the insecurity as well.

I also peed the bed when I was 25 and had drank most of the alcohol in the town of Del Norte, CO one weekend, but that's another thread.

not going for a TMI award, just saying it's fairly common, IIRC

shadowhawk77 · 04-30-2005, 12:22 PM

I shat myself in bed a couple times when I was little, but it was because I didn't want to get up to go to the bathroom.

lookout123 · 04-30-2005, 02:18 PM

and as suddenly as it began, it ended. he hasn't done it since the day that i posted the thread. yippee for him.

Clodfobble · 04-30-2005, 02:25 PM

He must be a lurker.

lookout123 · 04-30-2005, 04:01 PM

wouldn't surprise me. he probably is the one who hacked the cellar yesterday. when he was two, i had to disconnect the mouse when i walked away from the computer if i wanted to keep programs open. he somehow figured out that moving the mouse until the arrow pointed at the red box with a white X made the screen change and he would just laugh and laugh and laugh.

04-25-2005, 04:17 PM	#1
lookout123 changed his status to single Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Right behind you. No, the other side. Posts: 10,308	Potty trained child retreating... OK, so my son - the extremely strongwilled one from the other thread? He's got a little issue and I'm having a hard time dealing with it effectively. He will be 4 in June and has been 100% potty trained since he was 20 months. No accidents in all that time. When it comes to his body he is a clean freak, just like me. until now. He is having a little problem peeing in his pants. It has happened once a day for going on 2 weeks now. He doesn't go much - in fact, if he wasn't so horrified with the little bit of wetness there i wouldn't even bother to change his undies because it is so little. He will be sitting in the middle of the room and then get this panicked look on his face and run to the bathroom, but it is too late. When we talk about it he says that he was playing, or drawing, or whatever and it just snuck up on him. He isn't doing it on purpose or to make a point - he just gets too wrapped up in what he's doing until it is too late. Has anyone run into this before? Is it normal? or might he have a little bladder infection that causes this? any ideas on how to get him to pay more attention? the boy is horrified and embarrassed about it. my wife asks me about it and i'm clueless. i don't have any other kids and i'm almost 31 so i haven't peed my own pants for at least a month or two, so i don't know exactly what is happening here. __________________ Getting knocked down is no sin, it's not getting back up that's the sin

04-25-2005, 04:39 PM	#4
lookout123 changed his status to single Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Right behind you. No, the other side. Posts: 10,308	nothing has changed around our house. my wife and i haven't changed work schedules, no disruption in the marriage. it is just completely out of the blue, and i'm stumped. __________________ Getting knocked down is no sin, it's not getting back up that's the sin

04-25-2005, 05:01 PM	#6
lookout123 changed his status to single Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Right behind you. No, the other side. Posts: 10,308	no he says it doesn't hurt him at all. i suppose it could be insecurity. i don't know what would have triggered it, but anything is possible. __________________ Getting knocked down is no sin, it's not getting back up that's the sin

04-28-2005, 12:17 PM	#8
mrnoodle bent Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: under the weather Posts: 2,656	I was pretty insecure when I started kindergarten (I wasn't very well socialized, except for with two neighbor kids). I was afraid to ask the teacher to go to the bathroom, and shit myself. I also peed my pants in the waiting room of the doctor's office one morning. It was about a 3 month thing, happened maybe 4 times total. Come to think, it was right around the time my little brother was about to be born. That could've caused the insecurity as well. I also peed the bed when I was 25 and had drank most of the alcohol in the town of Del Norte, CO one weekend, but that's another thread. not going for a TMI award, just saying it's fairly common, IIRC __________________ Sìn a nall na cuaranan sin. -- Cha mhór is fheairrde thu iad, tha iad coltach ri cat air a dhathadh

04-30-2005, 02:18 PM	#10
lookout123 changed his status to single Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Right behind you. No, the other side. Posts: 10,308	and as suddenly as it began, it ended. he hasn't done it since the day that i posted the thread. yippee for him. __________________ Getting knocked down is no sin, it's not getting back up that's the sin

04-25-2005, 04:33 PM	#2
glatt ™ Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Arlington, VA Posts: 27,717	If he's been trained for about two years, then you might want to call the pediatrician's office and just ask them over the phone. They probably have a nurse you can talk to about it. It very well could be something medical like an infection. We have had occasional accidents with both of ours just in the few weeks after they were trained. They get distracted by playing and just don't pay attention until it's too late. It could be similar for your son, but sounds unlikely. He's been doing it right for so long. Good luck!

04-25-2005, 04:36 PM	#3
perth Strong Silent Type Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Fort Collins, CO Posts: 1,949	I have the exact same problem right now. In my case, I believe it has a lot to do with the fact that I'm finally dating again, and so he doesn't have my complete and undivided attention anymore. He always feels terrible, and it makes me feel bad, but I figure the best I can do is to make sure he has as much attention and fun with daddy as possible. This started a little over a week ago, and it's already gotten better, but the accidents are very upsetting to the both of us. Has he had any unexpected changes in his life recently?

04-25-2005, 04:43 PM	#5
kerosene Touring the facilities Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: The plains of Colorado Posts: 3,476	Lookout, he could be feeling a little insecure right now. I think toddlers can be that way without unusual circumstances. He might be going through a stage where he feels he really needs extra attention, so he dramatizes this situation. I dunno though. I think it would be a good idea to check with a doctor, in case of a bladder infection or something. Does it hurt him at all?

04-25-2005, 08:52 PM	#7
Clodfobble UNDER CONDITIONAL MITIGATION Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Austin, TX Posts: 20,012	My stepdaughter went through the exact same thing, right around 4 and a half she started having accidents because she would ignore the urge in favor of playing until it was too late. She had repeated accidents over a period of a month or two (though not as frequent as your boy, maybe once every 2-3 days) and was horrified as well. She mostly just got over it on her own, but we tried to help, while at the same time limiting the embarassment for her, by keeping track of how engrossed she was in something--not necessarily how long it had been since she last went to the bathroom--and breaking the reverie by casually announcing that one of us was going to go use the restroom. Usually that reminded her that she needed to go, without our having to directly ask her.

04-30-2005, 12:22 PM	#9
shadowhawk77 Silent and Deadly Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Michigan, USA Posts: 2	I shat myself in bed a couple times when I was little, but it was because I didn't want to get up to go to the bathroom.

04-30-2005, 02:25 PM	#11
Clodfobble UNDER CONDITIONAL MITIGATION Join Date: Mar 2004 Location: Austin, TX Posts: 20,012	He must be a lurker.

04-30-2005, 04:01 PM	#12
lookout123 changed his status to single Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: Right behind you. No, the other side. Posts: 10,308	wouldn't surprise me. he probably is the one who hacked the cellar yesterday. when he was two, i had to disconnect the mouse when i walked away from the computer if i wanted to keep programs open. he somehow figured out that moving the mouse until the arrow pointed at the red box with a white X made the screen change and he would just laugh and laugh and laugh. __________________ Getting knocked down is no sin, it's not getting back up that's the sin

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