Do guys really care about a girls sexual history?

[Iggy]

I have a question for bmw, what qualifies a woman to be a slut (in your mind)? What if she has had several (let us say 3) serious relationships in her lifetime and was monogamous in all of them? She has slept with more than one man, but she has been cautious with her partners.

As far as men having made an accomplishment if they have slept with many women, I think it is a load of horseshit. Men that sleep around are no more noble than women who do the same. Sometimes a woman is the gatekeeper, but there are many times when the man pressures the woman into it. Pressuring someone to do something they don’t want to do is not an admirable trait in any person.

In my experience, women that sleep with anyone that has a penis have underlying emotional issues, and like Sundae Girl said, it is a symptom of something else. The only “sluts” I know* have been molested, most by family members. What do you say about women whose virginity was taken through molestation or rape? Are they damaged goods too?

When you say you can “spot a slut from a mile away” I suspect you are talking about those damaged women who have been abused and don’t know how to respect themselves. But that doesn’t mean that just because a woman has had several partners that she is a slut. Far from it. Again, like Sundae Girl said, if they have healthy loving monogamous relationships then I don’t see how on earth you can say they are a slut. But it would help to know the answer to my first question before I say that you are over generalizing.

*I should say that for a woman to be a slut in my mind she has to not care who she sleeps with and she doesn’t have healthy relationships with the men she does sleep with (and of course sleep with lots of men but that will happen if she doesn’t care who she sleeps with).

Originally Posted by Iggy

I have a question for bmw, what qualifies a woman to be a slut (in your mind)? What if she has had several (let us say 3) serious relationships in her lifetime and was monogamous in all of them? She has slept with more than one man, but she has been cautious with her partners.

Willful sexual acts and reckless behaviour.

As far as men having made an accomplishment if they have slept with many women, I think it is a load of horseshit. Men that sleep around are no more noble than women who do the same. Sometimes a woman is the gatekeeper, but there are many times when the man pressures the woman into it. Pressuring someone to do something they don’t want to do is not an admirable trait in any person.

Again you miss the point of sexual advantage women have. To those who are given much, much is expected

In my experience, women that sleep with anyone that has a penis have underlying emotional issues, and like Sundae Girl said, it is a symptom of something else. The only “sluts” I know* have been molested, most by family members. What do you say about women whose virginity was taken through molestation or rape? Are they damaged goods too?

Ah, the abuse excuses. I never met a women that didn't claim to not have an excuse for there Undesirable behaviors.

When you say you can “spot a slut from a mile away” I suspect you are talking about those damaged women who have been abused and don’t know how to respect themselves. But that doesn’t mean that just because a woman has had several partners that she is a slut. Far from it. Again, like Sundae Girl said, if they have healthy loving monogamous relationships then I don’t see how on earth you can say they are a slut. But it would help to know the answer to my first question before I say that you are over generalizing.

See previous answer.

*I should say that for a woman to be a slut in my mind she has to not care who she sleeps with and she doesn’t have healthy relationships with the men she does sleep with (and of course sleep with lots of men but that will happen if she doesn’t care who she sleeps with).

Jack Nicholson said it best in the character he played in” As good as it gets."
He answers a women’s question in an elevator on how he's able to write about women so well "its as if you know us."

His answer..."I think of a man and take away all reason and accountability."

If anyone has ever explain women better I've never heard it.

[Iggy]

Originally Posted by bmwmcaw

Jack Nicholson said it best in the character he played in” As good as it gets."
He answers a women’s question in an elevator on how he's able to write about women so well "its as if you know us."

His answer..."I think of a man and take away all reason and accountability."

If anyone has ever explain women better I've never heard it.

So now you are quoting a movie to defend your argument? Yeah, that gives your argument credibility.

I see we will not come to an agreement. Willful sexual acts within a trusting, loving, and long term* relationship do not make a slut. I can agree with the "reckless behavior" part though. If any person (regardless of gender) is completely reckless with their bodies I would say they are a slut/man whore.

I think you are putting way too much stock in the "advantage" that women have. What about the ugly girls that have to fight with the man to get them to have sex with them? They obviously have to wait for the man to open the gate for sexual encounters, so should they be applauded for promiscuity? I think not. No one should be.

But you are going to believe what you want to believe since you don't have really have a reasonable argument anyway.

Edit: *By long term I am referring to at least over a year.

[DucksNuts]

Originally Posted by 9th

I know guys generally like to commit more to girls who make them wait a period of time for sex (not sure of the exact underpinnings of that), do girls feel more attacted to a guy who turns down their sexual advances for a while?

Not sure, the *chase* is a bit more exciting, but not sure whether the inevitable outcome will differ.

Seriously, I think I live on another planet at times....I've had long term relationships (3yrs+), plus a few shorter term ones (over 6mths) and except for the first one (aged 16), I havent withheld the sex.

**Proof reading would be a good thing

[Happy Monkey]

Originally Posted by Iggy

So now you are quoting a movie to defend your argument? Yeah, that gives your argument credibility.

Not just that, but a hateful, mysogenistic, antisocial character in a movie...

[9th Engineer]

The chase? That's it? So it all boils down to the hunt for sex then...

[DucksNuts]

Originally Posted by 9th Engineer

The chase? That's it? So it all boils down to the hunt for sex then...

Its not about the hunt for sex, but its been mentioned that if a girl doesnt put out straight away, she appears more unobtainable/ desirable....therefor, the *chase* is more appealing, because, well...there IS a chase I guess.

Whether or not there is a chase or sex is given up straight away, wont change if the relationship is going to work or not...IMO.