Humor...I Need Humor...

[BigV]

An American purchases and moves into a very remote farmhouse in the Shetland Islands. One, two, three months go by and he sees no one. Finally, there's a knock on the door. When the American answers it, he sees a wild-looking bear of a man practically filling the door frame, rough wool sweater, rough full beard and a rough accent.

"I'm here to invite ye t' a paaarty."

"Well! That's very nice of you, I'd love to come to a party."

"But I have to warn ye, it'll be a wild Shetland paarty. There will be wild Shetland dancing."

"I'm light on my feet; when I was in college I enjoyed going to all the dances."

"There's goin' t' be a fight. There's aaalllways a fight."

"I can hold my own; in the army I was boxing champion of the whole battalion."

"There'll be sex afterward. Wild Shetland sex."

"I haven't seen anyone in three months; I'm looking forward to a little female companionship."

"Well, all right then. It's settled."

"It's settled. What should I wear?"

"Just come as ye are--it's only goin' t' be you and me."