Divorce

limey · 08-22-2007, 05:17 PM

Deuce, I can't comment on the US legal side of things, but I do agree with others that have posted here that it seems that your wife does not want the marriage to continue, and feels sufficiently strongly about it to set legal restrictions on your actions/contact with her and your child. As others have said this can only be for one of two reasons: either through actual fear of you, or through a wish to manipulate things to her own advantage. Only you can tell which of those is her motivation - think about it carefully. It's also worth repeating that if she is subjecting you to a restraining order which limits your contact with her, then it is hypocritical of her (at best) to be ringing you and urging you to contact her.
The best things I think you can do under the circumstances are to look out for yourself, get good legal advice, and never badmouth your wife to your child. Blake said it best - if you love something you must be able to let it go. Let your wife go.
I wish you strength, and the loving support of your friends and family at this most difficult of times.

kgg · 08-22-2007, 09:22 PM

It's been a while since Deuce mentioned her calling. Perhaps she hasn't for a while. And, Deuce, have you called her? You say you have been talking and that not all the talks have been bad. There must be some progress towards the good if you can call it that. Is she initiating all of your conversations or are you a willing partner?

I will still play the devil's advocate and give them both the benefit of the doubt. Not knowing either one, I will not condemn either. I hope things work our both both of you so that you may, hopefully, come out the other side as, perhaps, friends instead of enemies for your sons sake.

Deuce · 08-23-2007, 08:45 AM

shit. I had a long htankful post written. to all of you.

I lost it. I am lost.

today is our 16th wedding anniversary. Happy Anniversary!!

I'm going back over to that other thread. I'm broken. I'm done. I will never be whole again. My whole life has been ripped from me. What I have given is gone. My name will be removed from the history books. I'm being written out of the play. My usefulness has expired. I have nothing to offer. All that remains is the cooling rotting corpse. "Come away from there!" Don't touch it! That's not good for you! You'll get sick! You'll get hurt! Leave that alone, I don't care if it looks like your daddy, it's dangerous.

goddammit I can't win. I can't survive.

08-23-2007, 01:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Deuce

shit. I had a long htankful post written. to all of you.

I lost it. I am lost.

today is our 16th wedding anniversary. Happy Anniversary!!

I'm going back over to that other thread. I'm broken. I'm done. I will never be whole again. My whole life has been ripped from me. What I have given is gone. My name will be removed from the history books. I'm being written out of the play. My usefulness has expired. I have nothing to offer. All that remains is the cooling rotting corpse. "Come away from there!" Don't touch it! That's not good for you! You'll get sick! You'll get hurt! Leave that alone, I don't care if it looks like your daddy, it's dangerous.

goddammit I can't win. I can't survive.

Yes you can, she is NOT you. You can move on without her and redefine yourself.
That you feel this way SHOWS that you were in an unhealthy relationship.
I wish you could see this.
She is a separate person who is CHOOSING to handle this in the way she is because SHE wants to... it says NOTHING about YOU.
See that and let it help you sever those feelings.
Start working on creating love for yourself and your life now, she is the past and only that.

08-22-2007, 05:17 PM	#1
limey Encroaching on your decrees Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: An island within the south-west coast of Scotland Posts: 7,016	Deuce, I can't comment on the US legal side of things, but I do agree with others that have posted here that it seems that your wife does not want the marriage to continue, and feels sufficiently strongly about it to set legal restrictions on your actions/contact with her and your child. As others have said this can only be for one of two reasons: either through actual fear of you, or through a wish to manipulate things to her own advantage. Only you can tell which of those is her motivation - think about it carefully. It's also worth repeating that if she is subjecting you to a restraining order which limits your contact with her, then it is hypocritical of her (at best) to be ringing you and urging you to contact her. The best things I think you can do under the circumstances are to look out for yourself, get good legal advice, and never badmouth your wife to your child. Blake said it best - if you love something you must be able to let it go. Let your wife go. I wish you strength, and the loving support of your friends and family at this most difficult of times. __________________ Living it up on the edge ... of civilisation, within the southwest coast of

08-22-2007, 09:22 PM	#2
kgg A Friend Indeed Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Issaquah Posts: 42	It's been a while since Deuce mentioned her calling. Perhaps she hasn't for a while. And, Deuce, have you called her? You say you have been talking and that not all the talks have been bad. There must be some progress towards the good if you can call it that. Is she initiating all of your conversations or are you a willing partner? I will still play the devil's advocate and give them both the benefit of the doubt. Not knowing either one, I will not condemn either. I hope things work our both both of you so that you may, hopefully, come out the other side as, perhaps, friends instead of enemies for your sons sake. __________________ It was a rainy, stormy night.....

08-23-2007, 08:45 AM	#3
Deuce Pesky Pugalist [sp] Join Date: Jan 2007 Posts: 191	shit. I had a long htankful post written. to all of you. I lost it. I am lost. today is our 16th wedding anniversary. Happy Anniversary!! I'm going back over to that other thread. I'm broken. I'm done. I will never be whole again. My whole life has been ripped from me. What I have given is gone. My name will be removed from the history books. I'm being written out of the play. My usefulness has expired. I have nothing to offer. All that remains is the cooling rotting corpse. "Come away from there!" Don't touch it! That's not good for you! You'll get sick! You'll get hurt! Leave that alone, I don't care if it looks like your daddy, it's dangerous. goddammit I can't win. I can't survive.

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