Humor...I Need Humor...

[TheMercenary]

> THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
>
> 1. Innovative
>
> 2. Preliminary
>
> 3. Proliferation
>
>
> 4. Cinnamon
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
>
> 1. Specificity
>
> 2. Anti-constitutionalistically
>
>
> 3. Passive-aggressive disorder
>
> 4. Transubstantiate
>
>
>
>
>
>
> THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN
> DRUNK:
>
> 1. No thanks, I’m married.
>
>
> 2. Nope, no more booze for me!
>
> 3. Sorry, but you’re not really my type.
>
> 4. Taco Bell ? No thanks, I’m not hungry.
>
> 5. Good evening, officer. Isn’t it lovely out tonight?
>
> 6. Oh, I couldn’t! No one wants to hear me sing karaoke.
>
>
> 7. I’m not interested in fighting you.
>
> 8. Thank you, but I won’t make any attempt to dance, I have no
> coordination. I’d hate to look like a fool!
>
> 9. Where is the nearest bathroom? I refuse to pee in this parking lot or on the side of the road.
>
>
> 10. I must be going home now, as I have to work in the morning.
>

[xoxoxoBruce]

Children's books
Daddy Has an Itch. Mommy Smells Like Fish: A Child’s Rhyming Guide to STD’s
The Best Things to Drink Are under the Sink
Toy Story 3: Buzz Gets a Woody
Is Angelina My Mommy?
Where the Wild Thongs Are
The Smith & Wesson Coloring Book for Kids
Ashley Has Two Daddies, and They’re Both Going to Burn in Hell
Dismemberment Donny Needs A Hand
The Secret Pot Garden
Princess Poledancer And The Twirly Tassle Gang
Santa Clause, The Tooth Fairy & The Easter Bunny: Just The Beginning of a Lifetime of Lies
Math Will Make You Ugly
The Magical World beneath the Tarp on the Pool
All Alone with the Internet: A Choose Your Own Adventure Story.
The Fog in the Looking Glass (and Other Ways to Find Out if Grandma’s Still with Us)
A Buzzing in the Night: Why Your Wii Control’s Batteries Are Gone
It’s Not that Grandpa Doesn’t Love You, He Just Loves Drinking More
You Don’t Need to Think When You’re Pretty
Furious George Gets Cut Off on the Freeway
Why Do Grandma’s Boobies Touch Her Waist? (And Other Questions Not to Ask Out Loud)
Rachel Has Seven Mommies: A Children’s Guide to the Book of Mormon
Things We Can’t Afford because Your Father Left Us
One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Mercury Poisoning
Frog And Toad Are Friends with Benefits