Potential sub looking for guidance

[monster]

:sulks:

[jimhelm]

scuse me, but I happen to be a product of American schools... and I can tell you that Math is singular! Maths? bugger off.

[classicman]

Originally Posted by HungLikeJesus

She's not a product of American schools.

lulz - was thinking the same thing as I got to your post...

[morethanpretty]

*Ahem*
I would like to point out that I have been a very good writer long before I was 17 and that not only am I the product of an American school, I was the product a Texan school. My parents deserve the most credit for my success. My mom taught me to read and pushed me to get the best grades at all times because she knew I was capable of them. I think parents should take more responsibility for their children's education and not expect the school to be completely responsible. This attitude that "the school is at fault" pisses me off a bit, the teachers are not there to raise your kids and instill them with the self reliability and curiosity it takes to learn. My mother was not highly educated herself, she got her GED (equivalent of a high school diploma) after I was born. Her mother had not even been able to complete middle school. Despite those obstacles, my grandma instilled in my mom the importance of learning and my mom instilled that value in me.



Back to the subject of this thread:
Why do we always get female subs? Where are the men subs?
Kay, do be cautious about who you trust even if there is not supposed to be any sex involved. Also, maybe see a counselor. I'm not trying to be insulting, but from my personal experience I have not met a sub who was emotionally/mentally stable. I might just know the wrong subs, but from that experience, you might benefit from talking to a professional and exploring the reason why you're a sub. I don't mean to suggest that you need to change, but I am just saying that you are young and you might benefit from some professional insight. If you're already seeing a counselor, I'll just STFU.


****Disclaimer: Any spelling or grammatical mistakes in this post that may discredit my claim at being a decent writer were made under the influence of pain killers and are therefor not subject to scrutiny. I reserve the right to change/edit/add/retract any statement I have made at a later date without warning.****

Originally Posted by classicman

cough/bullshit/cough.
Never met a 17 year old that wrote that well.
But hey - welcome and all that.

That is sad. I was writing college level essays at 17. My writing skills have actually declined with age and not being in a setting where they are required.

Some 17 year olds are IN college by that time,,,,,or even further along

[GunMaster357]

Originally Posted by morethanpretty

Back to the subject of this thread:

Allright, time for some fun and a bit of a coming out.

I am what is considered by some as a Dominant.

Originally Posted by morethanpretty

Why do we always get female subs? Where are the men subs?

Well, there are male subs, but they are quite rare at least from an heterosexual point of view. I think it's because we're wired that way both physically and culturally. Don't get me wrong : I'm for the equality between men and women. It's just the way we are.

Originally Posted by morethanpretty

Kay, do be cautious about who you trust even if there is not supposed to be any sex involved.

That is the main point : TRUST. I cannot stress it enough. Kay, the kind of relationship you're looking for is NOT for casual sex. You have to know your partner literaly inside out. And it goes both way.

In my own case, I'm not currently involved with anyone. That's because when I encounter a woman that may become my partner, I put everything on the table. Otherwise, it's like any other sexual relationship. It may go on for some time

I consider a D/s relationship as something that has to stay behind the bedroom door. In everyday life, my partner would do as every independant woman should do : make her own decisions.

Another important point : SAFETY. If you ever decide to become involved with someone, start to experiment lightly. Especially if the Dominant hasn't much experience. There may be times you'll put your very LIFE in his hands.

So, no bullwhip on the first session.

Originally Posted by morethanpretty

Also, maybe see a counselor. I'm not trying to be insulting, but from my personal experience I have not met a sub who was emotionally/mentally stable. I might just know the wrong subs, but from that experience, you might benefit from talking to a professional and exploring the reason why you're a sub. I don't mean to suggest that you need to change, but I am just saying that you are young and you might benefit from some professional insight. If you're already seeing a counselor, I'll just STFU.

I've met with female subs that were very happy in their life (married and with children). Submission was only a side of their private life. An itch they sometimes wanted to scratch.

I've also met some that were a bit askew because they had a very bad image of themselves, not necessarily coming from their D/s relation.

I've never met with a true sex slave.

[sexobon]

No ménage à trois sub sandwich for you.

Come back next year.

[GunMaster357]

Originally Posted by sexobon

No ménage à trois sub sandwich for you.

Well, that's not what floats my boat. I'm a bit selfish : I don't share.

[monster]

Coming out? OK, I admit, I'm into subtext in a big way....

[ZenGum]

I like a good game of dominoes.

I like this newb. She knows both kinds of maths, not just the simple kind that they teach Americans. :p I am mildly amused that her current user title is "lead subordinate". I am concerned that we may need to develop a short form of her name, and the initials are a bit dodgy.

[monster]

maybe we could use the initials backwards?

[Rrrraven]

Originally Posted by morethanpretty

Also, maybe see a counselor. I'm not trying to be insulting, but from my personal experience I have not met a sub who was emotionally/mentally stable. I might just know the wrong subs, but from that experience, you might benefit from talking to a professional and exploring the reason why you're a sub. I don't mean to suggest that you need to change, but I am just saying that you are young and you might benefit from some professional insight.

I think that suggesting someone might need counseling to explore why they identify as a sub is like telling someone they're not okay for something as basic as sexual orientation. Different is not deviant.

I also think that there tends to be some misinformation outside of the D/s world as to who actually has the *power* in a D/s relationship. Most subs I know are extremely dominant in their professional lives/family lives and choose to submit in their sexual lives. One could argue that the sub has all the power, or even better that a D/s relationship is all about power exchange. Negotiation is optimal in D/s relationships, if you can't negotiate your relationship, your limits, then there is no D/s relationship.

Just my .02

[DanaC]

Personally, I think the fact that this lass is seeking further information and looking for safe ways to explore her inclinations (along with being quite clearly comfortable with the vocabulary of this sexual subculture) shows that she is coming at this from a self-aware and careful angle. To me that shows someone with a healthy mind, not the reverse.

[Gravdigr]

Originally Posted by kaykatiekay

...but I will take pictures of mself performing certain commands as proof if the Dominant wishes...I am also happy to carry out punishments as the Dominant believes I need them.

Originally Posted by Gravdigr

And, then again, you may...

Take a picture of yourself, spatula in one hand, and a handful of your ass in the other.

Originally Posted by kaykatiekay

I see your emoticons and I raise you...[here you say no]

Originally Posted by Stormieweather

Point - KayKatiekay

No point for you!!! Not only did you not take said picture, as you were explicitly instructed to do, you said no. That is strictly forbidden. All sorts of things will come out of your mouth in my dungeon, but, "no" better not be one of them. Not when the flail is in my hand. You have no idea of the punishment you are in for now. But, as you demonstrate, you cannot follow simple instructions, so the punishment you willingly seek will not be forthcoming. Suffer.

If you want a tiny, infinitesimal smidgen of redemption, you may take a picture of yourself with a paper bag over your head while smearing sweet pickle relish all over a white t-shirt you are wearing. Outside.

This is your final chance.

[wolf]

remember folks, we only have three rules here.

Don't be insufferably annoying.

Don't try to break the board.

Don't do anything illegal.

She's stated she's under 18.

No go. Not even if you just think you're being funny.

I, for one, do not wish to have to explain anything to Chris Hansen, or know anyone who does.