I have a deep-seated need to be liked, coupled with a knack for pushing people away before they get too close (this may be that I was told once, and again it's back to the worst things you think about yourself, that if anyone REALLY knew me they wouldn't like me. This was back in the day when I seemed to have a million friends and a million admirers. This comment brought to surface all I'd unknowingly been telling myself for years, coming from a person I loved more than breathing. Devastating.)
It's a painful place to be, and results in lashing out followed by contrite shame.
As Dana said, a lot of this depends on my level of self-confidence on any given day. Which varies like the weather.
Last edited by infinite monkey; 10-20-2011 at 08:33 AM.
Reason: additional
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