What's mildly irritating you today?

[Pete Zicato]

Here's one I heard much like the first one, but much nicer.

A young couple get married and move to a different city where the husband has obtained a job. The wife who was still looking for employment got into the habit of making elaborate dinners. The husband tells the wife, "You don't have to make these elaborate dinners. We can live on Loooooove. She keeps making the dinners and he keeps telling her they can live on Looooooove.

The next night he comes home to find his wife naked, sliding down the bannister. "What are you doing honey?"

She turns to go up one more time. As she slides back down she smiles and says, "Warming dinner."

Not very funny here because you all knew what was coming.