Down here at the pawn shop - Page 53

Sundae · 05-07-2013, 03:44 AM

TW are you allowed to be funny for more than one day a year?
Because that really cracked me up. Again.

Chris - stop being so handsome.
I'd hate to have to wrestle your wife in the old-fashioned Highland way, bare-breasted and each carrying an 8lb baby...

And UT

I don't know if groundhogs are good animals or bad animals (bad = pest, and/ or bitey) but the sad little drag marks on the pavement make me want to cry.

glatt · 05-07-2013, 08:11 AM

Put a sign next to it. "Groundhog $10" and someone will pick it up and bring it into the shop to try to pawn it.

Undertoad · 05-07-2013, 08:44 AM

Oh don't be sad Sundae! Those aren't drag marks.

Those are blood trails. It bled out in the warm afternoon sun.

jimhelm · 05-07-2013, 09:11 AM

we have turkey vultures out in the country to handle that kind of thing.

I think we should take bets on the removal date

Sundae · 05-07-2013, 09:12 AM

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Bambi's Mum. Then Hazel. Now an un-named groundhog.

monster · 05-07-2013, 11:02 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by glatt

Put a sign next to it. "Groundhog $10" and someone will pick it up and bring it into the shop to try to pawn it.

or $70 and accept no less than $60

infinite monkey · 05-07-2013, 11:50 AM

Stage a major scene: someone comes in and offers 40 for the groundhog. You firmly say 'no less than 60' and you banter a while.

THEN, out of nowhere, start screaming and frothing at the mouth. Go outside and pick up the groundhog and start trying to rip it to shreds, beat it against the nearest car, screaming and ranting the whole time, wave it in stranger's faces repeating 'what is this worth what is this worth what is this worth" like some groundhog-oriented Dan Rather mugger.

It'd be a great exit, you must admit.

SteveDallas · 05-08-2013, 10:57 AM

On Lincoln Drive, there's a median barrier that keeps flotsam and jetsam from rolling down the hill and off the other side of the road. Leaves, twigs, etc. often build up right at the edge.

When the flotsam includes a dead animal, it's usually there for days, if not weeks.

Sundae · 05-08-2013, 01:11 PM

Nice use of the word flotsam.

Undertoad · 05-08-2013, 03:06 PM

I txted the shop, and the hog is gone.

Sammy said "Probably on someone's grill."

orthodoc · 05-08-2013, 03:50 PM

Eeewwwww. If it'd been cleaned right away, maybe ... but bleeding out all afternoon and then lying in the heat?
Hopefully not on someone's grill.

Griff · 05-08-2013, 07:44 PM

Off to the ~~woods~~ pawn shop for to catch a groundhog.
Oh, groundhog.
Run here Sally with a ten foot pole, (repeat)
To twist that whistle-pig out of his hole.
Oh, groundhog.
Here comes Sal with a snicker and a grin, (repeat)
Groundhog gravy all over her chin.
Oh, groundhog.
Look at them fellers, they're a-goin' wild, (repeat)
Eat that hog before he's cooked or biled.
Oh, groundhog.
I dug down but I didn't dig deep, (repeat)
There laid a whistle-pig fast asleep.
Oh, groundhog.
Now the meat's in the cupboard and the butter's in the churn, (repeat)
If that ain't groundhog I'll be derned.
Oh, groundhog.
Well you eat the meat and save the hide, (repeat)
Make the best shoestring ever was tied.
Oh, groundhog.
Look at them fellers, they're about to fall, (repeat)
Eat till their britches won't button at all.
Oh, groundhog.
Little piece of cornbread a-layin' on the shelf, (repeat)
If you want any more, you can sing it yerself.
Oh, groundhog

I started changing more stuff but it got pretty racist feeling.

bluecuracao · 05-09-2013, 06:00 PM

Bleurgh. Philly is dirty and dysfunctional, but I'm sure the Streets Department took care of poor ol' Mr. Groundhog. I hope they did, anyway...

jimhelm · 05-09-2013, 06:51 PM

Probably a team of rats

Griff · 05-10-2013, 05:27 AM

Do Philly rats wear safety vests for that kind of operation? That's a straw hat job around here.

05-07-2013, 03:44 AM	#781
Sundae polaroid of perfection Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: West Yorkshire Posts: 24,185	TW are you allowed to be funny for more than one day a year? Because that really cracked me up. Again. Chris - stop being so handsome. I'd hate to have to wrestle your wife in the old-fashioned Highland way, bare-breasted and each carrying an 8lb baby... And UT I don't know if groundhogs are good animals or bad animals (bad = pest, and/ or bitey) but the sad little drag marks on the pavement make me want to cry. __________________ Life's hard you know, so strike a pose on a Cadillac

05-07-2013, 09:11 AM	#784
jimhelm a beautiful fool Join Date: Sep 2010 Location: 39.939705 Posts: 4,504	we have turkey vultures out in the country to handle that kind of thing. I think we should take bets on the removal date __________________ There's a Shadow just behind me. Shrouding every step I take. Making every promise empty, pointing every finger at me. _tool

05-07-2013, 09:12 AM	#785
Sundae polaroid of perfection Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: West Yorkshire Posts: 24,185	WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Bambi's Mum. Then Hazel. Now an un-named groundhog. __________________ Life's hard you know, so strike a pose on a Cadillac

05-08-2013, 01:11 PM	#789
Sundae polaroid of perfection Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: West Yorkshire Posts: 24,185	Nice use of the word flotsam. __________________ Life's hard you know, so strike a pose on a Cadillac

05-08-2013, 03:50 PM	#791
orthodoc Not Suspicious, Merely Canadian Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 3,774	Eeewwwww. If it'd been cleaned right away, maybe ... but bleeding out all afternoon and then lying in the heat? Hopefully not on someone's grill. __________________ The greatness of a nation and its moral progress can be judged by the way its animals are treated. - Ghandi

05-07-2013, 08:11 AM	#782
glatt ™ Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Arlington, VA Posts: 27,717	Put a sign next to it. "Groundhog $10" and someone will pick it up and bring it into the shop to try to pawn it.

05-07-2013, 08:44 AM	#783
Undertoad Radical Centrist Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Cottage of Prussia Posts: 31,423	Oh don't be sad Sundae! Those aren't drag marks. Those are blood trails. It bled out in the warm afternoon sun.

05-07-2013, 11:50 AM	#787
infinite monkey Person who doesn't update the user title Join Date: Mar 2011 Posts: 13,002	Stage a major scene: someone comes in and offers 40 for the groundhog. You firmly say 'no less than 60' and you banter a while. THEN, out of nowhere, start screaming and frothing at the mouth. Go outside and pick up the groundhog and start trying to rip it to shreds, beat it against the nearest car, screaming and ranting the whole time, wave it in stranger's faces repeating 'what is this worth what is this worth what is this worth" like some groundhog-oriented Dan Rather mugger. It'd be a great exit, you must admit.

05-08-2013, 10:57 AM	#788
SteveDallas Your Bartender Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Philly Burbs, PA Posts: 7,651	On Lincoln Drive, there's a median barrier that keeps flotsam and jetsam from rolling down the hill and off the other side of the road. Leaves, twigs, etc. often build up right at the edge. When the flotsam includes a dead animal, it's usually there for days, if not weeks.

05-08-2013, 03:06 PM	#790
Undertoad Radical Centrist Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Cottage of Prussia Posts: 31,423	I txted the shop, and the hog is gone. Sammy said "Probably on someone's grill."

05-08-2013, 07:44 PM	#792
Griff still says videotape Join Date: Feb 2001 Posts: 26,813	Off to the ~~woods~~ pawn shop for to catch a groundhog. Oh, groundhog. Run here Sally with a ten foot pole, (repeat) To twist that whistle-pig out of his hole. Oh, groundhog. Here comes Sal with a snicker and a grin, (repeat) Groundhog gravy all over her chin. Oh, groundhog. Look at them fellers, they're a-goin' wild, (repeat) Eat that hog before he's cooked or biled. Oh, groundhog. I dug down but I didn't dig deep, (repeat) There laid a whistle-pig fast asleep. Oh, groundhog. Now the meat's in the cupboard and the butter's in the churn, (repeat) If that ain't groundhog I'll be derned. Oh, groundhog. Well you eat the meat and save the hide, (repeat) Make the best shoestring ever was tied. Oh, groundhog. Look at them fellers, they're about to fall, (repeat) Eat till their britches won't button at all. Oh, groundhog. Little piece of cornbread a-layin' on the shelf, (repeat) If you want any more, you can sing it yerself. Oh, groundhog I started changing more stuff but it got pretty racist feeling. __________________ If you would only recognize that life is hard, things would be so much easier for you. - Louis D. Brandeis

05-09-2013, 06:00 PM	#793
bluecuracao in a mood, not cupcake Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Philadelphia Posts: 3,034	Bleurgh. Philly is dirty and dysfunctional, but I'm sure the Streets Department took care of poor ol' Mr. Groundhog. I hope they did, anyway...

05-09-2013, 06:51 PM	#794
jimhelm a beautiful fool Join Date: Sep 2010 Location: 39.939705 Posts: 4,504	Probably a team of rats __________________ There's a Shadow just behind me. Shrouding every step I take. Making every promise empty, pointing every finger at me. _tool

05-10-2013, 05:27 AM	#795
Griff still says videotape Join Date: Feb 2001 Posts: 26,813	Do Philly rats wear safety vests for that kind of operation? That's a straw hat job around here. __________________ If you would only recognize that life is hard, things would be so much easier for you. - Louis D. Brandeis

Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 3 (0 members and 3 guests)