The Cellar  

Go Back   The Cellar > Main > Home Base
FAQ Community Calendar Today's Posts Search

Home Base A starting point, and place for threads don't seem to belong anywhere else

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 11-03-2008, 11:51 PM   #2251
ZenGum
Doctor Wtf
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Badelaide, Baustralia
Posts: 12,861
People of the USA, be warned.

If you elect Obama, the Lord will surely destroy you, just as He destroyed Sodom, and Gomorrah, and all other places that aroused His Wrath, for the Lord hates abominations. And if you elect Barry, you will verily become an Obamanation, and surely you will be smote by His fury.
__________________
Shut up and hug. MoreThanPretty, Nov 5, 2008.
Just because I'm nominally polite, does not make me a pussy. Sundae Girl.
ZenGum is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-04-2008, 11:27 AM   #2252
Sheldonrs
Master Dwellar
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 4,412
Quote:
Originally Posted by ZenGum View Post
People of the USA, be warned.

If you elect Obama, the Lord will surely destroy you, just as He destroyed Sodom, and Gomorrah, and all other places that aroused His Wrath, for the Lord hates abominations. And if you elect Barry, you will verily become an Obamanation, and surely you will be smote by His furry.
Smote by his furry what?
__________________
Laugh and the world laughs with you; cry and the world laughs AT you.
Sheldonrs is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-04-2008, 11:30 AM   #2253
Shawnee123
Why, you're a regular Alfred E Einstein, ain't ya?
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 21,206
Hey...you got smote in my furry!

No, you got furry in my smote!
__________________
A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones who need the advice.
--Bill Cosby
Shawnee123 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-04-2008, 11:38 AM   #2254
TheMercenary
“Hypocrisy: prejudice with a halo”
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Savannah, Georgia
Posts: 21,393
Quote:
Originally Posted by ZenGum View Post
People of the USA, be warned.

If you elect Obama, the Lord will surely destroy you, just as He destroyed Sodom, and Gomorrah, and all other places that aroused His Wrath, for the Lord hates abominations.
Then he will smote us. Ok got that one.

Quote:
And if you elect Barry, you will verily become an Obamanation, and surely you will be smote by His fury.
Wait, now Obama is going to smote us!?!?! WTF? Is he God? Some think so, ask Farrakan.
__________________
Anyone but the this most fuked up President in History in 2012!
TheMercenary is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-05-2008, 02:05 PM   #2255
SteveDallas
Your Bartender
 
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Philly Burbs, PA
Posts: 7,651
Today's mail included a letter for Mrs. Dallas with her Official Union Voting Guide and a reminder to be sure and vote on Nov. 4.
SteveDallas is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-05-2008, 02:07 PM   #2256
Pie
Gone and done
 
Join Date: Sep 2001
Posts: 4,808
An older man wearing a stovepipe hat, a waistcoat and a phony beard sat down at a bar and ordered a drink. As the bartender set it down, he asked, "Going to a party?" "Yeah, a costume party," the man answered, "I'm supposed to come dressed as my love life."
"But you look like Abe Lincoln." protested the barkeep.
"That's right. My last four scores were seven years ago."
__________________
per·son \ˈpər-sən\ (noun) - an ephemeral collection of small, irrational decisions
The fun thing about evolution (and science in general) is that it happens whether you believe in it or not.
Pie is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-05-2008, 03:15 PM   #2257
Shawnee123
Why, you're a regular Alfred E Einstein, ain't ya?
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 21,206
Too late for a Halloweenie joke? Ok, it's a costume party joke.

Guy gets invited to a costume party where the theme was "emotion." Each person was to wear a costume that portrayed some kind of human emotion.

Guy walks into the party completely naked, except for a hollowed out Bartlett Pear covering his wee wee, ahem, penis.

"What are you supposed to be?" the host asked in horror.

"I'm fuckin' dis pear, man!"
__________________
A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones who need the advice.
--Bill Cosby
Shawnee123 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-05-2008, 08:10 PM   #2258
footfootfoot
To shreds, you say?
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: in the house and on the street-how many, many feet we meet!
Posts: 18,449
The next guy in line is naked except for a flan covering his penis.
"What kind of emotion are you?"
"I'm fuckin' dis custard"
__________________
The internet is a hateful stew of vomit you can never take completely seriously. - Her Fobs
footfootfoot is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-06-2008, 12:54 AM   #2259
ZenGum
Doctor Wtf
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Badelaide, Baustralia
Posts: 12,861
Well, this didn't take long.


One potential problem with the new president elect:

Name:  Obama money.jpg
Views: 657
Size:  88.6 KB
__________________
Shut up and hug. MoreThanPretty, Nov 5, 2008.
Just because I'm nominally polite, does not make me a pussy. Sundae Girl.
ZenGum is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-06-2008, 08:17 AM   #2260
Pie
Gone and done
 
Join Date: Sep 2001
Posts: 4,808
(searching for the "That's racist!" kid animated gif...)
__________________
per·son \ˈpər-sən\ (noun) - an ephemeral collection of small, irrational decisions
The fun thing about evolution (and science in general) is that it happens whether you believe in it or not.
Pie is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-06-2008, 10:46 AM   #2261
bartman
not really bart
 
Join Date: Oct 2001
Posts: 67
Quote:
Originally Posted by ZenGum View Post
Well, this didn't take long.


One potential problem with the new president elect:

Attachment 20301
Down here, it's pronounced 'fiddy'
bartman is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-06-2008, 04:50 PM   #2262
jester
why so serious
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 1,712
A husband walks into Victoria's Secret to purchase a sheer negligee for his wife. He is shown several possibilities that range from $250 to $500 in price -- the more sheer, the higher the price.
Naturally, he opts for the most sheer item, pays the $500, and takes it home.
He presents it to his wife and asks her to go upstairs, put it on, and model it for him.

Upstairs the wife thinks (she's no dummy ), 'I have an idea. It's so sheer that it might as well be nothing. I won't put it on, but I'll do the modeling naked, return it tomorrow, and keep the $500 refund for myself.'
She appears naked on the balcony and strikes a pose.
The husband says, 'Good Grief! You'd think for $500, they'd at least iron it!'
He never heard the shot.
Funeral on Thursday at Noon. Closed coffin.
jester is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-06-2008, 06:03 PM   #2263
Cicero
Looking forward to open mic night.
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: New Mexico
Posts: 5,148
Quote:
Originally Posted by Shawnee123 View Post
Too late for a Halloweenie joke? Ok, it's a costume party joke.

Guy gets invited to a costume party where the theme was "emotion." Each person was to wear a costume that portrayed some kind of human emotion.

Guy walks into the party completely naked, except for a hollowed out Bartlett Pear covering his wee wee, ahem, penis.

"What are you supposed to be?" the host asked in horror.

"I'm fuckin' dis pear, man!"


That used to be a joke about Austrians. The other emotion was fucking dis custard.

The bono one is also better with the scottish accent.
__________________
Show me a sane man, and I will cure him for you.- Carl Jung
Cicero is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-06-2008, 06:08 PM   #2264
skysidhe
~~Life is either a daring adventure or nothing.~~
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 6,828
Seven reasons not to mess with a child

these are great

http://www.badpets.net/Humor/Kids/KidsEmbarrass.html

A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small.
The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.
The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah".
The teacher asked, " What if Jonah went to hell?"
The little girl replied, "Then you ask him".
skysidhe is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-06-2008, 06:12 PM   #2265
Pie
Gone and done
 
Join Date: Sep 2001
Posts: 4,808
Q. What do you get if you cross a donkey with an onion?

A. A piece of ass that brings a tear to your eye!
__________________
per·son \ˈpər-sən\ (noun) - an ephemeral collection of small, irrational decisions
The fun thing about evolution (and science in general) is that it happens whether you believe in it or not.
Pie is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Tags
humor


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 13 (0 members and 13 guests)
 

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

All times are GMT -5. The time now is 09:08 PM.


Powered by: vBulletin Version 3.8.1
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.