The utterly pointless Chuck Norris thread - Page 7

Happy Monkey · 10-23-2006, 03:09 PM

Chuck Norris is the only thing in the universe more real than his reflection in a mirror.

Trilby · 10-23-2006, 03:12 PM

If Chuck Norris was a vampire he would be able to SEE his reflection in a mirror.

Spexxvet · 10-23-2006, 04:06 PM

When Chuck is about to kill you, you can see your entire life reflected in his eyes. Then you're dead.

Happy Monkey · 10-23-2006, 04:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Brianna

If Chuck Norris was a vampire he would be able to SEE his reflection in a mirror.

Chuck Norris casts vampires' reflections for them.

noviceathome · 10-25-2006, 07:46 AM

Chuck Norris can hit you so hard he can actually alter your DNA. Decades from now your descendants will occasionally clutch their heads and yell " What the hell was that?"

noviceathome · 10-25-2006, 07:47 AM

Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door

noviceathome · 10-25-2006, 07:51 AM

We live in an ever expanding universe. All of it is trying to get away from Chuck Norris.

Hippikos · 10-25-2006, 08:09 AM

Chuck Norris can catch a fart and paint it green.

Spexxvet · 10-25-2006, 08:23 AM

A criminal invaded my house. I don't own a gun, so I yelled "Chuck Norris" and the home invader ran away, crying like a little baby.

noviceathome · 10-25-2006, 08:27 AM

Chuck Norris can move faster than light. Albert Einstein tried to tell Chuck that this is impossible. We now know Albert Einstein as Stephen Hawking.

wolf · 10-28-2006, 12:41 AM

Ever wonder what Chuck Norris has to say about all this?

lumberjim · 10-28-2006, 12:56 AM

damn you wolf!

CHUCK NORRIS IS A BORN AGAIN CHRISTIAN?! oh for fuck's sake!

chuck norris is dead to me.

chuck norris can eat my asshole. with a spoon. slowly

interesting chuck norris fact: Chuck Norris wets the bed.

Elspode · 10-28-2006, 12:57 AM

Chuck Norris believes that The Host is actually a Hostess Twinkie.

10-28-2006, 01:10 AM

@ wolf; therefore, Chuck Norris has his own ministry so that God will have someplace to go to be inspired!

Iggy · 10-28-2006, 10:51 AM

Oh, did I miss the fun? And here I had some fun things to say...

Well, I will post them anyway I suppose.
When I told my SO about this thread, the first thing he said was "Chuck Norris and Mr. T walked into a building. It exploded. No one building can hold that much awesomeness."

And here is my contribution: The Ultimate Showdown

Edit: Oops, I thought Chuck Norris won in that song. never mind.

10-23-2006, 03:09 PM	#1
Happy Monkey I think this line's mostly filler. Join Date: Jan 2003 Location: DC Posts: 13,575	Chuck Norris is the only thing in the universe more real than his reflection in a mirror. __________________ _________________ \|...............\| We live in the nick of times. \| Len 17, Wid 3 \| \|_______________\| [pics]

10-23-2006, 04:06 PM	#3
Spexxvet Makes some feel uncomfortable Join Date: Dec 2005 Posts: 10,346	When Chuck is about to kill you, you can see your entire life reflected in his eyes. Then you're dead. __________________ "I'm certainly free, nay compelled, to spread the gospel of Spex. " - xoxoxoBruce

10-25-2006, 08:09 AM	#8
Hippikos Flocci Non Facio Join Date: Aug 2006 Location: In The Line Of Fire Posts: 571	Chuck Norris can catch a fart and paint it green. __________________ Believe those who are seeking the truth. Doubt those who find it.

10-25-2006, 08:23 AM	#9
Spexxvet Makes some feel uncomfortable Join Date: Dec 2005 Posts: 10,346	A criminal invaded my house. I don't own a gun, so I yelled "Chuck Norris" and the home invader ran away, crying like a little baby. __________________ "I'm certainly free, nay compelled, to spread the gospel of Spex. " - xoxoxoBruce

10-28-2006, 12:41 AM	#11
wolf lobber of scimitars Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Phila Burbs Posts: 20,774	Ever wonder what Chuck Norris has to say about all this? __________________ wolf eht htiw og "Conspiracies are the norm, not the exception." --G. Edward Griffin The Creature from Jekyll Island High Priestess of the Church of the Whale Penis

10-23-2006, 03:12 PM	#2
Trilby Slattern of the Swail Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 15,654	If Chuck Norris was a vampire he would be able to SEE his reflection in a mirror.

10-25-2006, 07:46 AM	#5
noviceathome Coronation Incarnate Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: perth, australia Posts: 87	Chuck Norris can hit you so hard he can actually alter your DNA. Decades from now your descendants will occasionally clutch their heads and yell " What the hell was that?"

10-25-2006, 07:47 AM	#6
noviceathome Coronation Incarnate Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: perth, australia Posts: 87	Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door

10-25-2006, 07:51 AM	#7
noviceathome Coronation Incarnate Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: perth, australia Posts: 87	We live in an ever expanding universe. All of it is trying to get away from Chuck Norris.

10-25-2006, 08:27 AM	#10
noviceathome Coronation Incarnate Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: perth, australia Posts: 87	Chuck Norris can move faster than light. Albert Einstein tried to tell Chuck that this is impossible. We now know Albert Einstein as Stephen Hawking.

10-28-2006, 12:56 AM	#12
lumberjim I can hear my ears Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 25,571	damn you wolf! CHUCK NORRIS IS A BORN AGAIN CHRISTIAN?! oh for fuck's sake! chuck norris is dead to me. chuck norris can eat my asshole. with a spoon. slowly interesting chuck norris fact: Chuck Norris wets the bed. __________________ This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality Embrace this moment, remember We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan

10-28-2006, 12:57 AM	#13
Elspode When Do I Get Virtual Unreality? Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Raytown, Missouri Posts: 12,719	Chuck Norris believes that The Host is actually a Hostess Twinkie. __________________ "To those of you who are wearing ties, I think my dad would appreciate it if you took them off." - Robert Moog

10-28-2006, 01:10 AM	#14
NoBoxes Guest Posts: n/a	@ wolf; therefore, Chuck Norris has his own ministry so that God will have someplace to go to be inspired!

10-28-2006, 10:51 AM	#15
Iggy Back and ready to tart up the place Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Kansas Posts: 850	Oh, did I miss the fun? And here I had some fun things to say... Well, I will post them anyway I suppose. When I told my SO about this thread, the first thing he said was "Chuck Norris and Mr. T walked into a building. It exploded. No one building can hold that much awesomeness." And here is my contribution: The Ultimate Showdown Edit: Oops, I thought Chuck Norris won in that song. never mind. Last edited by Iggy; 10-28-2006 at 10:56 AM.

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