Really Creative Insults

Trilby · 03-21-2007, 04:19 PM

It's hard to shake people up these days--everyone is so jaded and recherche. It's tough to make an insult stick. I like this:

I scorn you, scurvy companion. What, you poor, base, rascally, cheating, lack-linen mate! Away, you moldy rogue, away!

Taken from: Henry IV, part 2

Shakespeare is still the high water mark.

What's your favorite insult?

Griff · 03-21-2007, 04:26 PM

Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries!

glatt · 03-21-2007, 04:31 PM

If somebody is being a little too smug, bragging about a possession they have, or a club they belong to, or a school they are going to, etc., you can say with a smile on you face "Well, I'm sure you will be very happy with that."

It's nice and subtle, and said in the proper dismissive way, it's a real put-down without being vulgar. The implication that "you" must have something wrong with you if you are happy about such a trivial thing.

Kagen4o4 · 03-21-2007, 05:26 PM

when someone annoying makes a really bad joke and people laugh to be polite, all you have to do is laugh after everyone finishes and say very sarcastically "hahaha, wow, you're so witty!"

Spexxvet · 03-21-2007, 05:26 PM

Your mother fucking sucks big fucking elephant dick!

Did your parents have any children that lived?

The best part of you ran down your mother's leg.

lumberjim · 03-21-2007, 07:26 PM

ok, then......don't forget to eat a dick!

Sheldonrs · 03-21-2007, 07:31 PM

I knew they could pile it high but how did they ever teach it to talk?

Kagen4o4 · 03-21-2007, 07:40 PM

1 million sperm and you were the winner?

lumberjim · 03-21-2007, 07:44 PM

oh, i feel so bad...I totally forgot to offer.......did you want some? : points to crotch with both hands:

monster · 03-21-2007, 08:03 PM

I belive that this thread contributes evidence to support the theory that creativity and testes come from the same biological matter and are mutually exclusive.

(Which of course means that men have no creativity and what women call creativity is a potential load of bollocks)

lumberjim · 03-21-2007, 08:05 PM

did you ever think anything that you DIDN'T say?

monster · 03-21-2007, 08:14 PM

I like that one.

Kagen4o4 · 03-21-2007, 09:39 PM

im sorry were you talking? i thought it was a yak's mating call and you were responding

Guyute · 03-21-2007, 09:59 PM

Waiting for someone to complain about my baby screams being loud so that I can say "Sorry for the screaming, but she took one good look at you and she is too young to understand monsters aren't real"

Guyute · 03-21-2007, 10:01 PM

From the movie 300, when Xerxes asks Leonidus to surrender and kneel, he replies "sorry, but after spending the day slaughtering your soldiers, I've developed a horrible knot in my leg muscle, so can't see this happening".

03-21-2007, 04:19 PM	#1
Trilby Slattern of the Swail Join Date: Jul 2004 Posts: 15,654	Really Creative Insults It's hard to shake people up these days--everyone is so jaded and recherche. It's tough to make an insult stick. I like this: I scorn you, scurvy companion. What, you poor, base, rascally, cheating, lack-linen mate! Away, you moldy rogue, away! Taken from: Henry IV, part 2 Shakespeare is still the high water mark. What's your favorite insult? __________________ In Barrie's play and novel, the roles of fairies are brief: they are allies to the Lost Boys, the source of fairy dust and ...They are portrayed as dangerous, whimsical and extremely clever but quite hedonistic. "Shall I give you a kiss?" Peter asked and, jerking an acorn button off his coat, solemnly presented it to her. —James Barrie Wimminfolk they be tricksy. - ZenGum

03-21-2007, 04:26 PM	#2
Griff still says videotape Join Date: Feb 2001 Posts: 26,813	Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries! __________________ If you would only recognize that life is hard, things would be so much easier for you. - Louis D. Brandeis

03-21-2007, 05:26 PM	#4
Kagen4o4 The Sheriff of Nothingland Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Melbourne, Aus Posts: 1,794	when someone annoying makes a really bad joke and people laugh to be polite, all you have to do is laugh after everyone finishes and say very sarcastically "hahaha, wow, you're so witty!" __________________ something we both can enjoy??

03-21-2007, 05:26 PM	#5
Spexxvet Makes some feel uncomfortable Join Date: Dec 2005 Posts: 10,346	Your mother fucking sucks big fucking elephant dick! Did your parents have any children that lived? The best part of you ran down your mother's leg. __________________ "I'm certainly free, nay compelled, to spread the gospel of Spex. " - xoxoxoBruce

03-21-2007, 07:26 PM	#6
lumberjim I can hear my ears Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 25,571	ok, then......don't forget to eat a dick! __________________ This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality Embrace this moment, remember We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan

03-21-2007, 04:31 PM	#3
glatt ™ Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Arlington, VA Posts: 27,717	If somebody is being a little too smug, bragging about a possession they have, or a club they belong to, or a school they are going to, etc., you can say with a smile on you face "Well, I'm sure you will be very happy with that." It's nice and subtle, and said in the proper dismissive way, it's a real put-down without being vulgar. The implication that "you" must have something wrong with you if you are happy about such a trivial thing.

03-21-2007, 07:31 PM	#7
Sheldonrs Master Dwellar Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Los Angeles, CA Posts: 4,412	I knew they could pile it high but how did they ever teach it to talk? __________________ Laugh and the world laughs with you; cry and the world laughs AT you.

03-21-2007, 07:40 PM	#8
Kagen4o4 The Sheriff of Nothingland Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Melbourne, Aus Posts: 1,794	1 million sperm and you were the winner? __________________ something we both can enjoy??

03-21-2007, 07:44 PM	#9
lumberjim I can hear my ears Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 25,571	oh, i feel so bad...I totally forgot to offer.......did you want some? : points to crotch with both hands: __________________ This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality Embrace this moment, remember We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan

03-21-2007, 08:03 PM	#10
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	I belive that this thread contributes evidence to support the theory that creativity and testes come from the same biological matter and are mutually exclusive. (Which of course means that men have no creativity and what women call creativity is a potential load of bollocks) __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

03-21-2007, 08:05 PM	#11
lumberjim I can hear my ears Join Date: Oct 2003 Posts: 25,571	did you ever think anything that you DIDN'T say? __________________ This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality Embrace this moment, remember We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion ~MJKeenan

03-21-2007, 08:14 PM	#12
monster I hear them call the tide Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Perpetual Chaos Posts: 30,852	I like that one. __________________ The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity Amelia Earhart

03-21-2007, 09:39 PM	#13
Kagen4o4 The Sheriff of Nothingland Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Melbourne, Aus Posts: 1,794	im sorry were you talking? i thought it was a yak's mating call and you were responding __________________ something we both can enjoy??

03-21-2007, 09:59 PM	#14
Guyute Gamehenge Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Halifax, NS Posts: 168	Waiting for someone to complain about my baby screams being loud so that I can say "Sorry for the screaming, but she took one good look at you and she is too young to understand monsters aren't real" __________________ It's Really Plain and Easy To See, The Family grows like fungus on a tree.

03-21-2007, 10:01 PM	#15
Guyute Gamehenge Join Date: Feb 2005 Location: Halifax, NS Posts: 168	From the movie 300, when Xerxes asks Leonidus to surrender and kneel, he replies "sorry, but after spending the day slaughtering your soldiers, I've developed a horrible knot in my leg muscle, so can't see this happening". __________________ It's Really Plain and Easy To See, The Family grows like fungus on a tree.

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