Divorce

[smurfalicious]

If she hadn't filed a restraining order, I'd suggest counseling of some sort. It helps some people - not all people. Couples counseling helped me for awhile. Until I realized my husband just didn't have it in him to be honest - not with me, not himself, not the counselor, not anyone. Proof you both have to want it to work in order for it to work.

Which brings me to me next point: she doesn't want it to work. A restraining order is a pretty clear indication that she either (1) fears you and is removing you from her life, or (2) she's playing some kind of sick game because she wants it all on her terms, and do you really want any of that crazy-bitch action?

As long as there is a restraining order, do not have contact with the woman, even if she attempts to lure you into it. The law is clear, and there will be no excuse for you to violate the order, even if she initiates contact. She may be putting on a nice act to get you to do what she wants (i.e. make the divorce easy for her, and not rack up any more legal bills fighting her for it.) Actions speak louder than words, and right now her actions are divorcing and restraining you.


Letting go may be an option to consider here. Sometimes we want what we just can't have. I didn't want to get divorced. But I didn't want to be miserable more than that. It's not the end of the world. And it's been my experience that, for the most part, time heals all wounds. Have faith that this is happening for a reason - that Life is taking you in another direction than the one you were previously heading in, and one day it will all be clear to you.